stupid knock knock jokes

"All men are the same, you are all stupid, selfish pigs and I vow to never love again! NEVER!" Nera's voice echoed with the sound of the rain. Nera Bradford, a young selfless girl who spent her life dedicated to loving one man until he betrayed her. No longer interested in love, she finds comfort in an old rich man named Marcus Rasshell and marries him. Unfortunately, their heaven crumbles when Marcus discovers he is impotent, he hires a man to secretly impregnate his wife, setting off a chain reaction of Desire, Greed, and Deceit. Will Deceit and Desire consume her or will she recover and get the happy ending she deserves?

"Fine!" I acquiescently cave in. "He better keeps his eyes off of you, or I'll poke his eyeballs out of its socket!" I grumbled exasperatedly. She just shook her head again in disbelief. It seems like it's becoming her habit soon. After a few minutes, he came back, and he barely glances to her side which made me happy. That guy is not stupid after all. I know, I am very possessive, but I'm just protecting what's mine. Whatever is mine, is mine alone, and sharing is not on my vocabulary. Deceitful Lies, Betrayal, Revenge, all in the name of Love. Will they both find their happy-ever-after?

The darkness in his eyes, the dangerous smell of in his breath, and his deathly grip keeping me bound to him made my heart pound in my chest and my body quiver beneath him. Shamefully, it wasn't anything that I wasn't used to, because…the things I let him do to me? When he was frustrated, annoyed, and angry at the world, I was here to be his pound of flesh. In return, he masked the void of my loneliness because for months, that was the transaction of our relationship. He'd pin me to the wall, bend me over the counter, pull my hair, slap me, choke me, and I enjoyed every second of it because in that moment, it finally felt good to be powerless. Irony is a funny thing. I enjoyed being in pain because it made me forget how much I was hurting. *** "I warned you, doll." His voice strikes a string of chills down the base of my spine, a reminder that all of the time in the world could pass, and he's still not letting go. This is where the good girl in me dies. "You're mine now," he whispers. *** My name is Mercy—Mercy Carter. I went to college. Got myself a useless Bachelor of Science in Mathematics degree. His name is Marcel—Marcello Saldívar. However, at the time, I didn't know that he, the heir to the Saldívar Mafia empire, was the man that I had blindly offered myself to. As smart as I am, I was stupid all the times when it actually mattered. After all, he did warn me he was dangerous. I just didn't think he could be much worse than my thug brother. I was vulnerable—naive. I belong to him. My name is Mercy, and I am the Mafia's Mercy.

Aubrey longed for just one night of pleasure with the Alphas son in bid to get him out of her system and what better day could it be to do so than the night before his wedding? Especially if he was the one that had initiated it. What was meant to be a night of secret pleasure turns into a scandal and ruins Aiden's wedding hereby causing his Coronation to be held on a standstill, to Aiden's dismay. Her claim of having a night with him as the pictures indicated angered him and, fueled with anger Aiden disgraced and slutshames her. In shame and unknowingly pregnant, Audrey is forced to flee her home and leave her life behind. Years later, a knock interrupts the usual banter of her children, only to discover that her presence is needed to cure the land of the pandemic threatening clear the existence of werewolves. Aubrey, now a famous and renowned doctor and married to Hayden, the man that had held her today when she felt like she had no one. They are a little bit too late as she had moved on and wasn't about to let go of the only thing that had kept her normal over the years. The brothers who once betrayed her in their different ways now find themselves at odds - one seeking her forgiveness, and the other hoping to use her for his ends but amidst their differences both of them share a common goal, getting her back by all means. A choice must be made, The Angel, Devil, or the man that had been there for her at her weakest, or why not all? Audrey must decide whether she can let go of the past before it affects everything and everyone around her.

"What I want to do to you," He murmured as he buried his face on my hair, "I want to bend you over this counter and fuck you to oblivion." My heart leaped and my face flush. I couldn't let him get to me, I kept promising myself that. But when the stupid bond keep getting stronger and I couldn't resist his seduction, it was only a matter of time for me to give in to Kian Santos. ***** She was the good girl. Faye Bennett. She could do no wrong in her father's eyes. She was the next in line Alpha of her Pack, she was held to a high standard, very much respected. But a one night mistake ruined her life. The night when the tyrant Alpha whose name is Kian Santos refused to let her go.

"The Prince I Love to Hate is an absolute must read! This romcom will have you rooting for Niamh and Olivier right from their hilarious first meeting. - Harlequin Junkie Blog top pick This prince? He’s anything but charming. I’ve never been the girl who’s dreamt of a prince rescuing me from a fire-breathing dragon before whisking me away to his castle. So when I fly all the way to Ireland to find my long-lost dad, I have no intention of playing the damsel in distress to some dude. But the night I encounter—and accidentally wallop upside the head—Prince Olivier of Salasia, my plans are completely upended. This prince is the opposite of charming, though. After thirty seconds in his presence, I want to feed him to a dragon. But fate is a fickle b*tch. Before I know it, I agree to team up with Olivier in the search for my dad. As I travel across Europe with this actual honest-to-god prince, I wonder, what’s the worst that could happen? It’s not like I’ll be stupid enough to fall in love with Prince Charming."

Blurb When I was fifteen years old I fell in love, he was a walking wet dream and for a teenage girl that was only learning to control her hormones, he was Death. I grew up in a religious household, my grandfather was a catholic pastor and so we were raised on a biblical perspective but somehow I always galloped more to worldly things. I was taught no cussing, no deception, and certainly no fucking a hot boy you just met two weeks ago, but- I loved him. I wanted to love him in all the ways I could, and I think he too loved me because he always promised forever. Somehow forever lasted short, I ended up in the wrong hands, terrible hands. I saw some bad things and did worse, my perception of life was ruined long ago now I have nothing, nothing but scars and demons. I had long forgotten about him, but years later, he crashes into my life, and he's married. His wife, making me an unwelcome proposal, and him, making me feel like the indistinguishable stupid girl I was seven years ago. However I'm no longer her, and he isn't the same eighteen-year-old I lied to, he breathes power and seduction that can be seen from miles away. All I want is to get my life in order but with my past feelings and demons resurfacing, I know one thing for sure, I am screwed. We both are. Caelum thinks he is the only fiend in my story, yet there's a far bigger demon lurking in the dark, and no matter the times he goes hunting, he won't find it, the demon hides in the most open places and the longer Caelum searches, the more broken he will be when he encounters it.

If she ever had a name, she didn't remember what it was. Cursed as a child to pay for her selfishness and pride, she was doomed to live out the rest of her life as a wolf. This was fine until local packs relented to let her live her life in solitude. It was fine until she forgot who she was and became a lonely she-wolf fending off every male in the territory. It was fine until she met him, the prince from the royal family ruling over her land. The stupid man found himself in danger and if she didn't save him, the entire royal army would be slaughtering all life in her beloved forest. So she saved him. And how everything she ever knew about who she was and who she is, is being questioned. Her body is beginning to change randomly into a human form she doesn't recognize. There is a glimmer of hope for a human life again, but does she want it? She was happy with who she was, wasn't she? And then, Prince Philip's older brother, Morgan, gives her a name... Aria. And he talks to her as if he understands her every thought. With emotions swirling, threats to her life, and a potential to love a man who is betrothed to another, Aria must decide between a human fate or eternity as a wolf.

A villain is just a victim whose story hasn't been told… And evil queens are the princesses that were never saved… She had the typical cliché story. The queen bitch in her school ruled over her peers while she dated the quarterback from the football team. A newbie good girl entered the picture and changed everything. After bunch of heartbreaks, stupid pranks, teenage jealousy and stuff, the quarterback fell for the new girl and everyone called it a happy ending. But it wasn't so happy for our girl. Because she wasn’t the good girl. She was the bad one. She was the rich and bitchy queen bee. When high school ended with her boyfriend of more than three years who was now her ex, vowing to keep some other girl happy forever, our girl lost it. So she let life take her wherever it desired. What she didn't know was that such recklessness will lead her directly to the most feared mafia boss of all times! How could she have guessed that going to a popular club with a fake ID and boldly dancing on top of a table will catch the eye of some dangerous people? And how could she have known that it'll also get her into some serious trouble when suddenly, gunshots are being fired all around her? Leaving a young super drunk girl alone in the night after she had witnessed him shooting a dozen of enemies was something the mafia leader couldn't do. That's why he took her with him...

My husband died in a fire trying to save me, leaving behind a mountain of debt and a newborn child. I worked hard to pay off the debt while raising the child, only to unintentionally discover that my husband hadn’t died at all. Instead, he was sleeping with my cousin. “Honey, you’re so clever. You transferred all the company funds and faked your death, leaving that stupid wife of yours to shoulder all the debt. “She’s so clueless that she doesn’t even realize the son she’s raising isn’t hers, that I swapped him out. Once she’s done paying off the debts, the three of us can live a great life together.” I silently sneered, pretending I knew nothing, and continued to raise the child. Twenty years later, my son returned home after studying abroad. The company went public in New York. On the day of the IPO, my cousin appeared arm in arm with my husband, holding a paternity test. “Claire, your husband never died. We’ve been together all these years. Alex is my son. Now that you’ve been his mother for so long, isn’t it time to return him to me?” My husband also presented a divorce agreement. “I built this company from scratch. It’s premarital property. Sign the divorce papers, walk away with nothing, and you can leave now.” I smiled and told him, “I’ve prepared a special gift for you too. I wonder if you’ll like it."