Twilight Funny Quotes

What happens when Noah Hudson who's a famous chef, a billionaire and handsome, has to babysit Millie Quinn who's clumsy, a college student and cute, who turns out to be his wife after an accidental drunk marriage in Las Vegas?

"Master, it is done!" At exactly twilight, an unfortunate lifeless head rolled on the floor, completely detached from the body. "Good ! Have the express mail package delivered before midnight today." "BOOM!" the gun went off. Mila came rushing in with only a towel wrapped around her body. "What the fuck happened?" She asked the petrified Brant who sat on the bed with his legs wrapped up and his head cringed upwards. He did not reply her. She followed the line of his eyes and that was when she saw it, a perforation in her roof. The sunlight was literally shining directly on them. She looked back at Brantley in confusion, well, he looked more confused than she was. "What…?" She opened her mouth to interrogate him but decided against it. Instead, she climbed beside him and carefully took the weapon from his hand. He did not protest. "This is not a toy." She said, taking off the bullets and partially dismantling the gun. Just in case his itchy hands decided to touch the pistol again. **** Being the lone survivor of a fire accident that claimed her entire family, Mila Rivers is back to get the company that once belonged to her father. But she's got one problem... Brantley White, the new CEO,  son to the man behind her family's death and her childhood friend-turn-rival. She needs to get him out of her way at all costs, but she can't deny the fact that he's hot and she keeps on finding herself in his bed. He does not hide his desire for her, no matter how high a wall she builds between them. Would she be able to resist her Rival's desire to get her revenge or would she fall for him instead?

How did this even happen? The girl whom she thought of as her best friend, the girl with whom she's sharing her room, is actually a guy? Hazel stood there with her feet rooted to the white marble floor, not even bothering to fake that utterly shook expression of hers by watching the handsome man dressed in woman's clothes. "She's a guy!?" Finally Hazel let it out straighning her mind. Tristan Sanchez is an undercover cop who by bad luck had to pretend as a sexy paino teacher According to his Cheif's orders. What would happen if the most dedicated and cold officer of the department falls in love with the clumsiest and cheerful girl ever. Can he complete his mission to find the culprit he's looking for? Or he will get distracted by the feeling called love.

Principal Rockwell isn't the only unusual thing at HG Wells Junior High school. The prankster strikes again and again and the inhabitants of the school are powerless to stop them.Till one day, they make a surprising discovery...Bullying beefs, jerky jocks and feisty kids.Hilarious pranks are made by the Prankster. Until what is thought to be a prank results into the death of a student and the incapability of the other. Hunter Zoey, Chirag and Josh do not believe these are mere coincidences.And they're all set to prove it

"What's happening?"The color of the once dead petals opened up to me, the brown and shriveled leaves, matching the petals in unbelievable harmony. A sight to behold.Who said moving could change anything? Wrong. For Kamara Kidjo, moving changed everything. New friends, new crush, new attitude. New powers?Ageline Kidjo knew the powers Kamara possessed but how long can one keep a secret? The truth as they say, will always prevail.

Eniola Fayola is fresh out of a 2-year relationship that ended in premium tears. However, a few days later she receives some good news when she gets a job offer at Legacy Real Estate company. Despite the unusual methods of Daniel Jacobs, the CEO, he is undeniably successful. Eniola, who is an aspiring businesswoman, seizes the opportunity to learn in such an enterprise. Little does she know that she is in for more than just learning how the ropes of business work. Tempers will rise, rumours will spread, family crises will be encountered and love will bloom in the strangest places. Book Cover Design: Samuel Umar.

The second installment of Seductive Vibrations series. Alena fights to bring Jackson back after he struggles to cope with possibly losing his closest friend and brother. They take their relationship to a new level, inviting a third and fourth to join on their nights of pleasure. Only someone lurks in the shadows, unhappy that Alena is getting all the attention.. Is destined for another painful ending? Will Alena forget to lock her heart away and give it to someone else and destroy her marriage?

Who meets Prince Charming in an elevator while carrying their broken shoe? Lena Masterson was having a rough day. Her coffee pot exploded, her favorite heel broke on the way to work, her computer died, and her coworker sabotaged her performance review that she should have aced. To top it all off, she had to stay late. So when she ran into a handsome stranger at work, she was certain that it was the worst day of her life. Instead, it was the start of something wonderful. From the moment she nearly bowled the man over, she thought about him. She didn’t know anything about him, and could only assume that he was someone’s assistant. Still, the encounter left her with new self-confidence. She made a move assertive enough to get the attention of her boss’ boss, and be granted a new position as the personal paralegal of the head partner. This promotion soon led to an important trip to the Caribbean, where she saw a familiar face on the beach… Everything seemed perfect when she was in Aiden’s arms, but he was holding something back. Worse, Lena was keeping a secret from him as well. She knew that she couldn’t keep up her little white lie forever, but it turned out that Aiden’s secret was much bigger. Much much much bigger. A billion times bigger, in fact. Even though he treated her like Cinderella at the ball, it was possible that the billionaire playboy just thought of her as one of his “flavors of the week”. After saying goodbye with one last barefoot kiss and returning to the real world, there was a burning question on Lena’s mind: Did this Prince Charming love her as much as she loved him?

Tough, self-willed, silly and not so awkward. Audrey is a young college student is determined to pass through college with good grades. No drama, no complications. With her best friends in the same college, she couldn't have been more happier. It was like having her safe circle around. Everything was going according to plan till Pretty boy, basketballer, Enzo Santana walks in. He's bold, effortlessly cool, Handsome to the core, with a panty dropping smile and a voice that could make any lady wet without having to try. Now here's the deal, he wants her to tutor him and she doesn't want any boy drama. How long will she be able to resist his charms and act oblivious to him. Because there's one thing about Enzo, what he wants, he gets. And as for her, it will be a cold day in hell before she gets her heart broken. If you love humor, sarcasm, romance, friendship and eternal war against goofiness, then this is definitely the book for you.

This isn't your typical human/vampire story. Claire is a human, raised by vampires. She grew up alongside werewolves and other Mythicals. But what happens when an old "family friend" visits and her world is turned upside down? Will she choose the life expected of her or will she fight for the life she wants?