Twilight Quotes Funny

Faraiah Villegas; a woman with a simple life. Since losing her parents at the age of eighteen, she has learned to work for herself. She provided her own food, daily expenses, et cetera. As she grows, the cost of living she has to maintain also increased. Because of that, she had to find a job that can provide an income that would meet her needs. Luckily, Zarelli's mansion—owned by the richest family in town—was looking for a maid. Without an ado, Faraiah grabbed the opportunity not knowing that it would be the beginning of her chaotic life. After meeting and finding the dark secret of the master of the house—Cleon Reve Zarelli—her world turned upside-down. "The alpha . . . has been chasing me."

SIX-PACK SERIES BOOK THREE *While this book can be read as a standalone, I'd highly recommend reading books one (Alpha Gray) and two (Alpha Theo) for context before this book* JAX : I'm no stranger to one night stands. Lots of girls want a hook-up with an alpha, so why should this one be any different? Maybe it's because she's the best I ever had. Maybe it's because she refused to tell me anything about herself. We agreed to one night, no strings attached. The problem is, I can't get that night out of my head; I've been obsessed with finding this girl since. When she shows up at the squad complex for training, I feel like it's my lucky day- until my best friend introduces her as his sister and things get... complicated. I can't go against bro code, right? Even if Quinn is my dream girl. Even if there's a crazy attraction between us that's harder to resist every day. I'm so screwed.  ~ QUINN : One night. It was supposed to be one night of anonymous, meaningless with a stranger. I just wanted to have a good time and forget about my cheating ex. It definitely did the trick- I haven't thought about my ex since, but now I can't stop thinking about that night or the sexy stranger who had all the right moves. When I arrive at the complex for a fresh start, I'm shocked to see him again- and even more surprised to find out that he's not only an alpha, but also one of my brother's best friends. Theo would Jax if he found out about that night. He can never know- which means I have to keep my distance. Even if I can't stop fantasizing about Jax. Even if it kills me.

After a very public break-up between the university's 'it' couple, all eyes are on the heartbroken Quarterback, Caleb Briggs. His life had been laid out in front of him for as long as he can remember. After one drunken night with a dream girl, he wakes up alone and is determined to find her. Little does he know, she doesn't want to be found. The last thing that Violet wants is to draw in extra attention. It's bad enough that she's the football coach's daughter, but to be dragged down in the gossip mill as The Rebound? Not on her life. When she breaks her father's one rule to keep away from his team and sleeps with the school's quarterback, she is prepared for the consequences. That doesn't mean that she isn't planning on running from them for as long as possible.

Ivy Reed, a twenty year old with a haunting past. Ace Romano, the soon-to-be Italian mafia boss and also Ivy's brother's best friend who instantly takes a liking in Ivy when he first sees her. What happens when Ivy finds herself falling for him? And he, for her? Read to find out

Three thousand years ago came the twilight of the gods. The betrayal of the Fire God reduced all civilizations to ashes, along with order itself and the glory of the divine realm. Three thousand years later, upon the new lands created by the King of the Gods, the deities were gradually reborn. The silent and ruthless King of the Gods. The beautiful and gentle Queen of Heaven. The innocent yet cruel Fire God. The endless conflicts between gods and giants, the blessings left behind for a thousand years, the memories preserved within the Hall of Valor… To me, all of it had once been nothing more than tales recorded in ancient scrolls. Even my encounter with Loki felt like a destiny long foretold. Only after becoming engaged to him did I realize that my marriage to Odin had once been the happiest time of my life— and that Loki himself had been the one who destroyed that happiness with his own hands. Had there been no memories left by the God of Love, had the war between the two tribes never begun, I would have known clearly what I was meant to do. To remain by Loki’s side. To accompany him—from rebirth… to destruction.

Gwen is a rogue who hates pack wolves. After her parents were brutally murdered by their pack for a crime they did not commit, Gwen has had nothing but hatred in her heart. On a night hunt, Gwen encounters the legendary rogue killer, Alpha Liam. A man who hates rogues with every fibre of his being. However, the moon goddess likes to play funny games. Liam and Gwen are mates. But this bond does not stop their hatred for each other. Liam takes her back to his pack, unable to leave her but hateful of her existence. He offers Gwen a deal. They would be mated for as long as it took for her to produce an heir. The rogue and alpha are dancing on the thin line between lust, love and hate. Can they pretend for long?

After a 12-year absence, Austin returns to the horse farm in Wyoming she has always considered her true home. But things have changed, and the farm she inherited comes with some enemies - one of them being the Carter family. Cortland Carter now handles his family's affairs and is determined to get the water rights back from his neighbor, who won them from his grandfather in a poker game. Fate has a funny way of bringing people together, and when Austin saves Cortland's niece, the two finally meet. Despite the feud between their families, they both feel a mutual attraction that cannot be denied. But with their families at odds, is there any hope for a future together? "Coming Home" is a heartwarming tale of love and betrayal.

Until recently, Carolina Lane has lived a normal life, but when she moves to this town, things change. Having Kayler Brown, the sexiest and most respected boy in school, as a neighbor is not funny at all. While Caroline is trying hard to make this bossy yet meddling boy stay out of her business, she receives death warnings: Attention, Carolina. The forest will be your new enemy. Do not approach Kayler, or otherwise, your death will be even more painful than I had planned. Who sent this letter? What is Kayler hiding behind? What's the secret of this town? Caroline desperately wants to figure out the truth. However, Kayler won’t answer the questions. He just takes her hand and gazes at her. “You are mine.” He said.

A security guard caught a snake in our apartment complex and delivered it straight to my door. I was just about to scream when floating comments cut in. [The male lead got dumped and turned back into his real form just to spy on his girlfriend, and he actually got caught? This is funny as hell!] [He got dumped, and his girlfriend hates him. He's probably gonna cry himself to sleep!] [Aww, poor little snake can't curl up on his girlfriend tonight.] The big black snake looked pitiful in the guard's hands. It secretly sized me up with its slit pupils. I tried holding out my hand, and the black snake stared in disbelief. Two seconds later, it obediently rubbed its head against my fingers.

How can a young, cute man have bad intentions? He just wants to "warm your bed". Open it and experience a whirlwind romance. “I Slept With My Ex-boyfriend's Uncle” When I was drunk, I went to see my ex-boyfriend and tried to get back with him. But when I woke up, I found his uncle lying beside me. “A Brave Jump to My Crush” A love story between an aloof Prince Charming and a funny underachieving girl。 I had been in love with him for many years, and I finally went after him. On the night of our classmate reunion, I pretended to be drunk. I took his clothes off and tried to sleep with him. But I regretted it halfway through.