Chapter 1 -Stunned: Vanessa

‘Mate!’ my wolf, Lena, screamed in my head on the morning of my 18th birthday. I was sitting by the river waiting for my best friend, Ty, to arrive for a swim. I turned on the boulder that I was sitting on to see Tyler heading in my direction. 

‘Nice try, Lena. That’s Tyler, and we’ve been friends since we were tiny pups. It’s not like that between us,’ I told my wolf. The goddess wouldn’t do something like that, would she? ‘MATE!’ Lena boasted in my head as she pranced around. 

There has got to be some sort of mistake. Why would the goddess mate me with my best friend? Tyler and I have done everything together since we were old enough to start getting into mischief. Well, everything except for having sex. We kissed once several years ago; it was gross and awkward. Two nights ago, we brought Cass and Lucien with us to the river, and though we couldn’t see each other, I knew he was screwing her while I was riding Lucien for a night filled with orgasms. This has got to be a joke, right?

My mother has always told me that the moon goddess designs our mate pairings so that two halves become one whole. That even though you live a happy and fulfilled life, once you find your mate, you will wonder how you ever survived without them. The love between mates is sacred, unconditional, and together you are complete.

I watched Tyler approach our spot by the river, and when the wind shifted, his beaming smile vanished. Horror and confusion took its place. He tried to paste a smile on his face as his pace slowed before he stopped beside me. “Happy Birthday, Vanessa,” he mumbled as he looked around for something.

“Th-thank you, Tyler,” I stuttered as he looked everywhere but at me. Damn the goddess, why would she do this? 

“This is for you,” he muttered, holding out a small box as he continued to search the area. Whatever he was looking for, it was making him more frustrated by the minute.

“Tyler, are you okay?” I asked as I could sense his agitation building.

“Yeah. I’m fine, I guess. I just thought I smelled something, but I don’t see anything around here,” he murmured as he finally sat beside me. 

I knew what he smelled, I was smelling it too. His wolf, Stalker, had to be going as crazy as Lena is, but I wasn’t going to be the first to say anything. Tyler was probably in denial and needed to come to terms with this mess before he talked about it. I am okay with that for now. I don’t even know what to say anyway.

I unwrapped the slender box, and when I opened it, I was both thrilled and filled with dread simultaneously. It was a stamped leather bracelet that said ‘T & V BFFs 4 life.’ “Ty, it’s beautiful. I love it.” When I leaned over to give him a sideways hug, my bare arm brushed his, and he jumped up as if he had been burned by silver. 

“What the fuck, Vanessa? You’re kidding me, right? It’s you?” he growled. I didn’t understand his anger. Confusion, I could appreciate, but outright anger, I didn’t understand.

“Calm down, Ty. I don’t want this any more than you do. It isn’t like I asked the goddess for this. We just need to figure out what to do about it. Others have rejected their fated mates before. It isn’t unheard of,” I stated, trying to remain calm for both of us.

“You know that Alpha Riker forbids mates to reject one another, unless one is abusive to the other or if they are dying. I am supposed to ascend to Delta of the pack next month on the night of the super blue moon. If we reject each other, it will make me weak, and I could be stripped of my title before I even get it,” he ranted as he paced back and forth in front of me.

“I know that, but we both have someone else anyway. I’m sure you don’t want to give up Cass any more than I want to give up Lucien. Ty, I love you, but I don’t think I could ever love you in that way. When I pictured us growing old, it was you with your mate and me with mine. Delta Tyler Houston and Lead Female Warrior Vanessa Stinson with our pups growing up best friends just like we did,” I tried to reason with him.

I really didn’t know how to make Tyler see that rejection was our only real option. We should be able to speak with Alpha Riker or one of the ranked members of the pack and straighten everything out.

“Like you don’t already know that neither of those relationships is going anywhere. Both of them want to better their status by being seen with someone of a higher rank, Vanessa. They probably fuck each other when we aren’t around,” he sneered, and I felt like I had been punched in the gut. 

Why would he say something so malicious? Cass and I aren’t exactly close, so I couldn’t be completely sure she wasn’t like that. However, I was completely certain Lucien would never use and betray me in that way.

Incensed, I jumped to my feet and punched Tyler in the face. “Take that back!” I screeched as I took another swing at him. He caught my fist in his hand this time and twisted my arm behind my back. 

“Vanessa, stop. You know what I am saying is true. Cass and Lucien just want to be somebody, so why not do it with someone of a higher status? They may or may not be fucking each other, but people like that do those things,” he said with his lips next to my ear. When did Tyler turn into a judgmental, self-righteous bastard? Worse yet, why did anyone think he was the appropriate choice for Delta?

I felt like my world was rapidly falling apart around me. Who was this man holding onto me, making such vicious remarks? We’ve been best friends since we were very young, and now I feel like I didn’t even know him at all. This was who the moon goddess thought would complete me? Tyler single-handedly destroyed everything. I would rather grow old without a mate at all than be mated to him. Some birthday this has turned out to be, I would have been better off to be killed by rogues or whatever else is out here killing pack members.

When Tyler let me go, I fell to the ground sobbing with my heart broken. I don’t know how long I lay there with my world shattered around me. When I woke up this morning, I was a woman with a bright, even if unknown, future ahead of me. Now I feel like an empty shell with lies for a past and no discernible future. 

I sat up and just stared at the water as it rushed downstream. Usually, when I had a problem, I would go to Tyler and we would go for a run or do something crazy, which would make me feel better. Now that he is the problem, I feel so lost. 

As I leaned back to look at the sky, my hand brushed something on the ground. When I looked down, it was the bracelet that Tyler had given me for my birthday. Tears stung my eyes as I traced the lettering; ‘T & V BFFs 4 life.’ The bracelet was a lie, just like my life has been. Even though I felt as if I had a hole in my chest where my heart had been, I was keenly aware that my heart was still there: beating in pain and sorrow. The hole I felt, was rapidly filling itself with anger at Tyler for destroying my happiness. 

I clutched the bracelet in my hand for only a second before my arm drew back and I heaved it into the rushing waters. “I HATE YOU, TYLER ERIC HOUSTON! I hate you for destroying everything, and I hope that I never see you again!” I raged as the bracelet hit the water and sank below the surface. It wasn’t like Tyler was there to receive my anger, and throwing the bracelet wasn’t as cathartic as a physical release of the anger would have been. Throwing away the gift that Tyler made was nothing more than symbolic of removing the rubbish from my life.

I drew my knees up to my chest, wrapped my arms around my legs, and lay my head on them as I sobbed once more. I had lost my best friend, and a seed of doubt had been planted in my heart and mind about the man I had spent the last year of my life with. Why would the goddess do this? Aren’t we supposed to be her beloved children?

I stayed by the river because I didn’t want to go home and pretend to be happy. I didn’t want to listen to my mother’s dreamy drivel about finding my mate and feeling completed by them. I had found my mate, and it destroyed every shred of happiness I had.