1. Died Months ago?

KIKI POV

Excitement was not the word to describe how I felt.

“Ma’am, we have beautiful dresses that fit your size,” the sales rep's friendly voice tore through my thoughts.

“Oh, please, let me see them,” I responded, my smile spreading on my face as I followed behind her to the female wear section

Not just any section, but the plus-size section. I was excited to be back in the city I grew up in but that wasn’t the main reason I was excited.

After two years of dating Jordan and eight months of a long-distance relationship we were finally going to have sex tonight.

“What’s the occasion?” the sales rep asked, stopping in front of an array of gowns.

I almost blurted out that I was going to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time.

“Nothing too corporate—a sexy gown and lingerie,” I replied instead

“Ohhh, someone is going to have a fun night,” she smirked and it only made me blush.

Well, for a sales rep I am sure she knows that she is supposed to have her boundaries with what she said to customers but I was not even angry, instead I was blushing.

“Then I recommend a gown that would show off those beautiful curves,” she replied, looking at me in admiration.

Girl please. She was about my age, twenty four-ish.

She walked further to the rack of gowns and I followed, admiring the dressed up plus size mannequins. I for one had never been the girl to show her curves, rather I hid them behind baggy dresses, sweaters…

Life felt better that way, but I certainly didn’t want my first night with Jordan to be with the baggy T-shirt I was wearing.

I felt guilty somehow because whenever he wanted to touch me, I always resisted, not because I didn’t feel anything, God, I love Jordan very much.

The only reason I didn’t want to get intimate with him was because I was insecure. He understood, never pressured me, and was willing to wait for the right time.

When I became a teenager, puberty came, the damn insecurities came along too, a double package.

My girlfriends used to tease me about my virginity every time, especially on our girls’ nights out when I was supposed to be a reckless college student.

Oh well, I finished my last college exam a day ago, and I just got back to Louisiana unannounced. No one knew I had taken the flight back except my parents. My older brother, Harry, was busy with work, so…

My first stop was the mall, where I could shop for dresses before heading home and yes, next to Jordan’s apartment to surprise him.

The vibration of my phone made me take my eyes off the flowery gown the sales rep was showing me. I looked down at my phone.

A text from Jordan

: I know your final exams were stressful yesterday. I sent you some money now for flowers, a sweet treat or anything you want, take care. I miss you and I love you.

I giggled, looking down at my phone like a girl drunk in love. Time was running out, after a delayed flight, it was already 7p.m and I had not found a dress yet.

“Do you like this?” She pulled out a green gown straight from the rack of cloth, it was a smoky hot gown which had a very wide opening.

“Nah, it will reveal too much of my boobs,”

“And why? Are you hiding your beautiful girlies?” she asked like she wanted to clock me instantly.

“Let me try it on,” I gave in, moving into the dressing room.

When I got out, I was not sure how it looked on me.

“Oh my, you look so stunning,”

If I wasn’t standing in front of a mirror I would have told her to stop bluffing.

The dress was fire! I moved closer, then twirled to see how perfectly the gown hugged my curves.

Maybe I should start dressing this way more often and shouldn’t get just one gown. Since I was back in Louisiana, job hunting soon and staying permanently, it meant I needed more sexy dresses for my man.

I tried on a gold dress with a long slit, and an off-shoulder style.

“No man would be able to take his eyes off you,” she complimented

“You think so?” The imposter side of me asked before I could even think

“Look at those curves, not all men like it but the one that does? Know the tea,” She said, packing the gowns and a black lace lingerie I had picked out.

I loved the fact that she wasn’t just casual to me but friendly. “Thank you, Taylor.” My eyes moved from her name tag to her face.

“I am not really a sales rep here. I recently finished from college, helping my uncle run his boutique,”

“Really? I also just finished,” what else did I have in common with her, I liked her already.

“Congratulations girl,” Taylor beamed a smile at me “There is a party on the side of town tonight, will you like to attend?”

I missed partying in my city “Ouch, not today. I uhh got somewhere to be tonight,”

“Right, where you will show up dressed in those sexy gowns?”

I swear I didn’t want to blush but I did whilst nodding my head.

“You must love this man,” Taylor asked more than said

We exchanged contacts, promising to keep in touch but just before I walked out of the boutique Taylor’s voice called after me “Be hot for daddy tonight, in that sexy lingerie.”

A feeling of embarrassment washed over, what did she want me to say? Yes I will? I quickly left the mall before she could say anything.

***

Back at my childhood home, I took a long shower and when I was done it was already 9:00pm. I put on my makeup, styled my hair. I put on the lingerie, the dress and matched it with a pair of low heels.

I grabbed my purse and took one last look in the mirror, I couldn’t help but shriek. I could not wait to meet my boyfriend “Jordan is going to love this,”

My phone vibrated on the table and it was a picture and text from Jordan.

: Don’t get flowers and treats. Use it for your gym membership. You really have to start taking your weight loss seriously. I love you.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. Jordan was always on about how he wanted me to lose weight and it usually made me sad but the attached picture of Jordan didn’t allow me to be sad.

A smile crept up my face, as I looked at my man’s picture.

Since we were in a long-distance relationship, we usually shared pictures randomly. I drew in a sharp breath about to put the phone in my purse so I could get going but something in the picture caught my eye.

The background of the picture looked strangely odd, zooming in, my jaw dropped.

I didn’t spend years studying computer science not to differentiate what an AI picture looked like.

Jordan could have fooled me with this once. He must have been too lazy to take a picture, that was why he sent an AI-generated picture of himself.

Just to confirm my suspicion, I scrolled to other picture he had sent me earlier “What the fuck?”

Even pictures from months ago? For the first time I was seeing the tiny inconsistency in the pictures, my boyfriend had been fooling me with fake pictures of himself?

It dawned on me that Jordan and I didn't talk on calls and rarely chatted, we were fine that way, right?

I slid the phone into my purse, looking at the mirror, my dress, my makeup, all for Jordan, they were not going to go to waste. AI pictures of Jordan were forgivable, he must have his reason.

I walked to the front door, “Mom, I will be out for the night,”

My mom looked up from her knitting, “You are becoming a woman,”

Uh? Yes? I am twenty four, why?

I noticed her gaze drop to my gown, oh that. So I was a child for not dressing up to show my curves?

“It’s still not my style,”

She furrowed her brows “Oh come on. You have to finally accept yourself the way you are Kiki,”

That word “finally” meant a lot. Since high school, I had been bullied because of my size. That was the reason I chose a college in a city far away from home.

“Goodbye, mom” I opened the front door. Soon I would get a job and move into my own apartment.

I hailed a cab, a strange thought crossed my mind. What if my boyfriend died months ago? Maybe no one had found it easy to tell me hence the AI pictures and generic chats?

I pushed the thought out of my head as fast as it came, I would get my answers when I got to his apartment.