Chapter 1

Laura's POV.

This day was supposed to be perfect.

It was my last day in college, and for once, my chest felt light instead of tight. The kind of light that came with endings that promised new beginnings for me.

I stood in front of my mirror, turning slowly, smiling at my reflection like I was meeting myself for the first time.

But tonight mattered more than anything to me. 

There was a graduation party happening off campus, and Chad, my boyfriend, had planned everything together.

Down to the smallest detail. Matching outfits. Matching Colors. A couple's statement. We were supposed to walk into the graduation party together and let everyone see what we were.

I had imagined it so many times.

I was adjusting my earrings when Zara, my best friend, walked in. She didn't smile at me. She didn't tease me. She didn't say my name.

Her face was calm, almost too calm, but her eyes gave her away. 

 “Laura,” she said softly. “Have you checked your phone?”

I felt anxious and I turned to her. “Is everything okay?” I asked that and she hesitated for half a second, then smiled too quickly at me.

“Have you checked it?”

“No,” I said slowly. “Why?”

Relief flashed across her face. “Thank God.”

“Zara.” I said, as my heart skipped a beat but my voice was more audible now. “What is happening?”

She relaxed and reached for my hand. “You should sit.”

That was when my heart started racing.

I grabbed my phone before she could say anything else. My fingers trembled as I unlocked it. The class group chat was exploding, messages were flying in too fast to read properly and piling on top of each other Laughing emojis. Shocking reactions. Names being tagged.

Then I saw it. A video and my stomach puked me so hard that I thought I might throw up.

It was Chad. And Camilla. I saw them kissing and it was not just that.

It was an undeniable and very intimate passionate sex between them. The way she was grinding on his dick so hard, and in all honesty it was ugly to me.

 My vision blurred away as I watched Camilla laugh, her voice low and teasing.

“What about your girlfriend Laura?” She asked in the video. 

“There is nothing between us. She's the one forcing herself on me.” Chad said with so much confidence and I felt like I had been slapped.

My hands started shaking so badly, before my brain could catch up and I had to sit down. 

The room spun around in circles, my ears were ringing as though I had been dropped underwater as I struggled to breathe.

This was a man I loved. This was the man I defended. The man I imagined forever with.

The comments outside the video were worse.

“I didn't know Chad was single like this.”

“Serves her right. Laura really thought she stood a chance?”

“She is just a nerd.”

“I was shocked when I heard Chad was dating her.”

“Without him, who even is she?”

“She is nothing without him.”

“I wouldn't even know her name if not for Chad. So she should be grateful he ever noticed her.”

Then Chad's message appeared.

Each message peeled something off me as the criticism grew louder. I just felt emotionally drained, my chest ached so badly that I thought it might split open.

I had loved him quietly and completely. I bent myself around his life, his schedule, his moods. 

I didn't for one day disregard him even when he forgot about my birthday and still did not make it up to me, I forgave him for that and even celebrated his birthday in a more grand manner.

I told myself that love meant patience. That if I was good enough and soft to him he would always choose me.

Zara knelt in front of me, grabbing my hands.

“Laura, breathe. Please.”

That was when the tears rushed down my cheeks. It was silent and uncontrolled.

“I loved him,” I whispered. “I really loved him.”

She pulled me into her arms, rocking me gently.

“I know.” she said.

“I planned everything with him.” I said through my tears. “My future. My life. I thought_” my voice broke. “I thought he was my forever.”

“He doesn't deserve you Laura. Trust me when I say he doesn't.” Zara said and she pressed her forehead to mine.

I wanted to believe her. But I didn't know if I could or I could not.

“I'm fine.” I said instantly, even as my heart shattered. The words tasted like blood. That was who I was. The girl who said everything was fine while falling apart inside.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I wasn't supposed to go to the graduation party.

After that humiliation, after seeing that video. I wanted to disappear. Lock myself away and pretend the world didn't exist.

But Zara wouldn't let me.

“You are coming with me to the graduation party.” She said firmly, standing in my doorway. “You are not hiding. You are going to walk in there with your head high.”

So I did.

I wore the dress Chad had never seen me wear before. It was a gold colored dress, it was fitted, bringing out all my curves and bold in a way I had never allowed myself to be before.

My hair fell loose down my back. My makeup was sharper and bolder. When I walked inside the party, heads turned to look at me and for once, they stayed turned.

“Look at you Laura. You look so beautiful” Zara said as she squeezed my hand.

I felt unreal. Like I was playing a role I didn't audition for and stepping into a version of myself I didn't recognize yet.

Then my eyes landed on the one person that I did not even think I was ready to see.

Chad leaned against the bar like he owned the place. He was smiling and he looked very relaxed. Untouched by the damage he had caused.

When his eyes landed on me, he smirked. Of course that was what he would always do. That same familiar arrogance.

He walked over to me in slow steps as his eyes scrutinized my body.

“Wow Laura, you look beautiful.” he said. “I didn't think you would show up. 

“You are dressed in a different way tonight. Did you do all of these just for me to notice you? Don't tell me you got jealous over that little video?

My hands curled into fists. I said nothing to him and he leaned closer. 

“You know.” he continued, lowering his voice. you don't have to act proud. We both know you still want me, after all you have never been able to get a handsome guy like me or should I rather say you would never be able to do that.”

Hearing him speak to me with so much arrogance had already stirred up anger inside of me. I dug my nails into my palm because I was trying so hard to swallow everything he was going to say to me.

“Camilla is just fun,” he continued. “But you? You are safe. I could still keep you around.”

People were watching us. He didn't even care about that because all he was bent on doing was just to humiliate me. He was just willing to tarnish the little reputation I held unto myself.

He just wanted people to laugh at me as usual because he knew that Laura would never say anything. She would never even try to defend herself, but for how long must that continue?

“I know you love me. You always do.” he said softly.

And something inside of me snapped. Not loudly or even dramatically, and I looked at him. 

I really looked at him. And for the first time, I didn't feel small anymore.

Before my brain could even try to stop me from doing what I wanted to do. I had already slapped him across his face as the slap echoed and gasps filled the room.