LOGINA few rounds into the night, when Ethan Brooks set his glass on the table and suggested a reverse game of Never Have I Ever. The rules were simple. Everyone took turns naming something they'd done. Anyone who hadn't done it put a finger down. The first person to put all five fingers down had to take a dare chosen by everyone else at the table. So when Ethan grinned and said, "I've dated a Grant," I laughed and raised my hand too. "What do you know? So have I." The whole table cracked up. When it was Claire Howard's turn, she lazily swirled the drink in her glass. She glanced at me, then looked at Noah. "Last month, Noah and I celebrated our seventh wedding anniversary." My smile slowly faded. "Don't joke about that." But Leah Collins, sitting next to her, burst out laughing. "Who says she's joking? We were all there for that 'wedding' of theirs." Seven years. Noah and I had only been together for five years. And our real wedding was still nine days away. I turned to Noah on instinct. He had his head down, fiddling with his phone as if he hadn't heard a thing. But the screen was still open to his text thread with Claire, and at the very bottom was a kissing-face emoji she'd just sent. I ended up with the dare. Ethan egged me on to use Noah's phone to call the third number on his recent-calls list and put the call on speaker. A woman's voice came through the speaker, warm with laughter. "Babe, you left your underwear in my bathroom when you showered here yesterday. Are you coming by tonight to pick it up?" The room went dead silent. I knew that voice. Leah. The others didn't even look shocked. Each of them had a piece of Noah's past: flirty jokes they'd once shared with him and secrets only his friends were in on. Some of them had even slept with him. And I, the woman who was marrying him in nine days, was the outsider. "You all win this game," I said, looking at him. "But him? I don't want him anymore."
View MoreA year after I called off the wedding, I moved into a new apartment I'd bought myself.It wasn't big, but I'd chosen every single thing in it. No one else knew the door code, and my parents had the only spare key. The couch in the living room wasn't fancy, but for the first time, I had a home that belonged only to me.I rarely asked how Noah was doing after that.After dinner at the company's year-end holiday party, everyone started another reverse game of Never Have I Ever.A young coworker who'd only recently joined the company racked her brain for something that would win the round, then declared smugly, "I've called off my own wedding."The few people at the table who'd been around long enough to know my story went quiet.But I raised my hand without missing a beat. "What do you know? I've actually done that one."The new hire's eyes went wide. "No way. Do you regret it?"I thought about it. "No regrets.""What about the groom?""Dumped him. Didn't want him anymore."Everyone at th
Claire and Noah had their big falling-out two months later.Ethan, of all people, told me about it as if it were some awkward joke.Their whole group was at a friend's party that day, and Claire had been drinking heavily. Just before everyone left, she grabbed hold of Noah in front of them all. "Irene doesn't want you anymore. Why won't you give us a shot?"Noah's expression changed on the spot. He shook her off and turned to leave.Claire clung to his jacket and finally screamed, her voice almost hysterical. "You spent seven whole years with me. Seven years! Noah, what am I to you?"When I heard that, her words sounded strangely familiar.Back when Noah broke my heart again and again, I'd wanted to ask him that exact same question more times than I could count.Ethan said Noah was quiet for a long time. In the end, all he said to Claire was, "You crossed the line."I almost laughed out loud.The man who had always dismissed his girlfriend's boundaries as unreasonable was finally deman
A month later, the apartment sold without a hitch.After the remaining mortgage balance, the broker's commission, and taxes were deducted, the proceeds were wired to our separate accounts under our ownership and contribution agreement.The day Noah got his share, he came looking for me again.This time, I agreed to meet him at a coffee shop near my office.Some things really did need to be said once and for all.He'd lost a lot of weight, and there were dark circles under his eyes. The first thing he did when he sat down was slide a cashier's check across the table to me."I don't want this money. It's yours."I pushed the check back. "It was split according to our agreement. Keep your share.""That was our home," he said, staring hard at me. "We lived there for three years. Don't you miss it even a little?"I picked up my coffee and looked up at him. "What is it you really miss? The apartment? Or the days when I kept everything in order so you could come home and not have to deal with
Noah started asking our mutual friends to plead his case.Ethan was the first to call."Irene..." He hesitated. He'd probably been about to call me the future Mrs. Grant but caught himself. "Noah's in really bad shape. He's been holed up at home drinking for days. Could you go see him? He won't listen to anyone right now."I couldn't help laughing."Ethan, when I had a fever of 103 and begged him to come home, he didn't listen to me either."The line went quiet.After a moment, he forced himself to explain. "We really didn't mean to hurt you with that game at the party.""I know."They really hadn't meant to hurt me.Because they'd never thought of me as someone whose feelings they had to consider.To that crowd, everything was material for a joke: who Noah had flirted with, who had kissed him, and who had a key to his place. My feelings as his fiancée mattered least of all.I had no interest in hearing anything else, so I hung up.A few days later, Leah somehow got hold of my number.






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