Panimula

"I can't believe you're my sister," puno ng pandidiring pahayag ng nakatatanda kong kapatid na si Pennie.

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa mga paa ko at doon ko ipinako ang mga mata ko para maiwasan ang mapanghusgang tingin, hindi lang ni Pennie kundi pati na rin ng mga kaibigan niyang kasama niya ngayon.

"Kapatid mo siya?" tanong ng lalaking—baklang—kasama ni Pennie. Hindi ko alam ang pangalan niya dahil ngayon ko lang siya nakita.

How did I know he was gay? It was the cute bunny hairband perched on his head that gave me the hint. If his hair had been longer, I might have mistaken him for a girl because of how strikingly beautiful his face was. And honestly, if it weren’t for that playful little hairband keeping me grounded, I probably would have already let my imagination wander and started fantasizing about him.

He's gorgeously handsome.

"Sad to say but yes," mataray na sagot ni ate. "Tara na nga, guys. Sa kwarto na lang tayo uminom."

Sumunod ang apat na kasama ni ate paakyat, kaya naman naiwan akong mag-isa sa baba.

Sinimulan kong linisin ang itinapong cake ni Pennie. It's her birthday today. Gusto ko sanang i-surprise siya, pero imbes na matuwa siya sa effort kong pagbili ng cake para sa kanya, nainis pa siya at itinapon iyon sa akin.

I want to reconcile with her. Palagi kasi kaming nag-aaway, kaya naman kahit ngayong araw lang sana ay magkabati kami at ma-celebrate namin nang sabay ang birthday niya. Pero mukhang hindi na niya ako kailangan dahil nandiyan na ang mga kaibigan niya.

If Mom and Dad were here, they probably would’ve scolded us already. Unfortunately, they’re too busy at the moment. Our parents are currently in the States, looking after their business. They run an apparel distribution company, which keeps them constantly occupied and away from home. That’s why, most of the time, it’s only Pennie and me left here on our own.

So yeah, I'm always stuck with my b*tchy sister.

"Hey, doll," tawag sa akin ng bakla habang pababa siya ng hagdan. Nakapamulsa siya at seryosong nakatitig sa akin. Bakla ba talaga siya o assumera lang ako?

Did he just call me doll? Dahil ba mukha akong manika?

"My name is Pixie," I said.

"I know, but I prefer calling you doll," maarteng pahayag niya saka niya ako inirapan. Okay, confirm. Bakla nga.

"B-Bakit?"

"Kahawig mo kasi ang voodoo doll ng mga mangkukulam." Humagalpak siya ng tawa na ikinasimangot ko.

"I want to punch your Adam’s apple. Pasalamat ka matangkad ka."

"Hahaha! Pasalamat akong pandak ka," sagot niya. Ang kapal niya. Abot ko naman ang mukha niya kung susuntukin ko siya, pero malaki ang possibility na makaiwas siya kaya sayang effort kung tatangkain ko pa.

Hinawakan niya ang ulo ko saka ginulo ang buhok ko na mas lalo kong ikinainis.

"Hindi mo ba itatanong ang pangalan ko?" tanong niya na nagpataas ng isa kong kilay.

“I don’t want to know. I don’t even like you anyway,” I snapped, my voice laced with irritation as I turned my back on him.

“You’ll come to like me soon, doll,” he said confidently, almost teasing, as if he were certain of the outcome.

“I won’t,” I shot back without hesitation.

“We’ll see about that.” With a sly smile, he removed the bunny hairband from his head and gently placed it on mine, letting his fingers linger for a brief moment. “Wayde,” he introduced himself, his tone smooth and deliberate. “My name is Wayde.”

"Bakit mo ’to ibinibigay sa akin?"

"Mas bagay ’to sa’yo kesa sa akin," sagot niya. He genuinely smiled at me. Jusko! Bakit naman nakakaakit ang ngiti niya? Para akong inaakit ng mga dimples niya.

"Sinasabi mo bang mas maganda ako kesa sa’yo?"

"Magkaiba ’yon, chaka. Assuming ka masyado!" singhal niya sa akin.

Chaka? Bwisit! Kanina lang doll ang tawag niya sa akin ah!

“Wayde!” tawag ni Pennie sa kaibigan niya. Masama ang tingin niya sa akin kaya mabilis akong umiwas ng tingin at lumayo kay Wayde.

“Halika na. Don’t waste your time on her,” dagdag pa ng kapatid ko.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Susunod na.”

Kahit hindi ko nakikita ang mukha ni Wayde, sigurado akong tinatarayan niya si Pennie.

“Chaka doll.”

“Bwisit ka.”

He sexily chuckled and messed my hair again. Siguro naiinggit siya sa buhok ko.

“See you later,” saad niya bago umakyat papunta sa kwarto ng kapatid ko.

I don’t want to see him again, but what choice do I have? Kaibigan siya ng bitchesa kong kapatid, kaya for sure palagi kaming magkikita.

“DOLL!”

Hindi ko nilingon si Wayde at ipinagpatuloy ko na lang ang paglalakad palayo sa kanya. Nang makasabay siya sa akin, bigla niyang iniharang ang paa niya sa harap ko dahilan para matalisod ako. Nabitawan ko ang dalawang paper bag na yakap ko na may lamang groceries, kaya nagkalat ang mga laman sa kalsada.

“Why did you do that?!” sigaw ko kay Wayde.

“Sinubukan ko lang kung alerto ka.”

“Siraulo ka talaga!” nanggagalaiti kong sigaw sa kanya habang sinimulan kong pulutin ang mga pinamili ko. Hindi man lang ako tinulungan!

I hate him!

How on earth am I supposed to like him when all he ever does is annoy me every single day? He seems to take pleasure in pushing my buttons, as if driving me crazy is his favorite pastime.

I will never—absolutely never—like him! Not now, not tomorrow, not in this lifetime!

Even if he were the very last person left in this world who could possibly help me, I would still refuse to run to him. Not even if my problem were a matter of life and death would I ever rely on him. That’s how much I can’t stand him.

I ended up swallowing my own words.

Wayde Jhon Johnsons—the guy who never missed a chance to call me “doll,” “voodoo doll,” or “chaka doll.” My bully. For so many years, I swore I hated him, that I would never, ever see him in any other way. I was certain of it.

But fate has a cruel sense of humor. After all that time, I found myself in a situation I never thought would happen. I turned to him for help, and in exchange, I became something I once swore I would never be—his partner… in bed.