He Isn’t Here To Say Goodbye

“I asked him not to tell and he was also embarrassed about taking money from my mom. But it has helped his family a lot and he isn’t working as much,” she noted.

Again, something I didn’t know. Jada was more his girlfriend, pretending, than I ever was.

“Jada, I appreciate you for coming by, but I do really need to get going,” I said, giving her a side hug. “It was kind of you to do this for me and for Keegan,” I finished, heaving a giant duffel bag into the hallway.

“No problem. I hope you have the best time at your training camp. Get lots of goals and stuff. Or whatever they do in softball,” she joked.

As she said goodbye I thought about what she had said. I wished Keegan had trusted me enough to know I would understand. We obviously didn’t have the relationship that he and Jada had.

I went outside to place my remaining bags on the curb. Everyone was already there to see me off: My dad, Alison, Casey, Cyman, Quinn, Ms. Kyren and the twins. I didn't see Keegan. I gave out hugs and kisses to them all as the bus was nearing our house according to the assistant coach’s text messages in our Band app. I looked around frantically for Keegan. Why wasn’t he here to say goodbye?

Baylen pulled me aside.

“I texted Keegan and called him, but no response,” he said, placing his arm around me and hugging me.

My brother has twin instincts even if we weren’t twins. He knew my heart was breaking, not being able to say goodbye to Kee.

As the bus pulled up, my stomach dropped. This was it. I would be gone for almost a month. I had never been away from home unless it was a one day sleepover or at my dad and Alison’s place. To say I was nervous would be an understatement. My stomach was in knots and my palms were sweaty. Mom had packed me a few snacks and Baylen let me take his LSU tiger that mom had bought him when he was five.

The bus pulled up in front of our house and Coach Brandy jumped off to greet me. She was in LSU gear from head to toe. Her gold trimmed baseball cap was something I definitely wanted to own. She looked so professional.

“Brees James Hamlin?” she asked as she reached her hand out.

“Yes! That’s me!” I said, shaking her hand firmly.

She checked off a few things on her clipboard and then she greeted my parents as well. I introduced the rest of the family. She motioned to the boys to grab my luggage and they loaded it under the bus. She said goodbye and gave me five minutes to say goodbye to my family and friends, as she hopped back onto the bus. I loved seeing her purple and gold button-up shirt. It was so official.

I gave my last hugs and waved goodbye. I headed to the bus, wishing Keegan and I were leaving on better terms. I wanted him here. I waved and blew kisses and started to board the bus. But before I hit the first step someone grabbed my hand. I was whipped around quickly and was standing face-to-face with Keegan. What was this? Where was he?

“Brees, I can’t let you leave without telling you this. I know it isn’t ideal with our entire family here and some of our friends,” he said jokingly, gesturing to the small crowd, “but I need you to know. The last few months have been torture. I have been struggling with helping my mom and sisters and my mental state has been all over the place. I haven’t been a good friend to you and I’m so sorry for that,” he said.

“It’s okay. I’ll see you soon and maybe we can hang out with Baylen,” I said, patting his shoulder like we were just pals.

“Brees, hear him out,” I heard a familiar voice say through the crowd.

I scanned faces and saw Jada.

“Jada made me come. I was certain I should stay away from your special day, but she called me and told me to get over here. She even picked me up,” he said, pointing to her car.

“I'm glad you came, but we could have FaceTimed later Kee. I really have to go,” I said, seeing my coach Brandy tap her watch.

“But then I couldn’t have done this,” he said.

He pulled me by the front of my joggers and placed his hand on the small of my back. I was suddenly entranced by him and his blue eyes. He grabbed the nape of my neck and kissed me. Right there in front of my whole family, he kissed me. His lips were so soft. My stomach started to flutter and the warmest feeling came over me. I had been dreaming about those lips for months and never thought they would be on mine ever again. I couldn’t believe what was happening. This was all I had ever wanted. I didn’t exactly want to be kissed in front of our parents, but it is what it is. Our hearts, for the first time ever, wanted the exact same thing.

As we broke away from our passionate kiss. I realized that everyone was still standing there watching us, including the bus filled with girls and coaches. Suddenly, hoots and hollers erupted from the bus and the small crowd.

I hid my face in his shirt and he hugged me close.

“I’m not letting you get away again,” he whispered in my ear.

The warmth of his breath was so sexy. He was lucky people were around or he would be in trouble.

After our family and friends congratulated us on finally taking the leap, I got on the bus. I was leaving less sad. More full of hope. Possibly as Keegan Patts’ girlfriend.