Chapter 12

We stared at one another for a moment and then without even thinking we lunged toward each other. It was like a magnetic force pulling us together. Her tongue massaged mine slowly and gently. Her fingers ran through the back of my hair, pulling me closer as they did. She smelled so good and tasted so sweet. Her kisses were passionate yet gentle. It was as if she had been wanting to kiss me since we met. I could kiss her all night. She cradled my back and leaned me against the swing. Her hand caressed my thigh. Chills went all over my entire body. She kissed my neck for a moment and then returned her lips to mine. It felt good to be wanted by someone again.

Just as I thought we would engulf one another in kisses. I heard a car. When I pulled away from Jagger, I saw the silhouette of someone standing in front of the headlights.

“What the fuck Brees?” I heard Keegan say.

“I came here for you. I-I missed you. I needed to say goodbye. I needed to tell you that I still love you. But…” he didn’t finish his sentence.

He looked so hurt. I didn’t even know what to say. I scooted away from Jagger. I wanted to run to him, but that didn’t seem like a welcomed choice. Why did I let Jagger kiss me? Was it something I truly wanted or was I just caught up in the moment of my sadness? Regardless it hurt Kee and I hated myself for that.

“Keegan, you have to understand. We haven’t spoken in weeks and I have been so torn up about you. Jagger was helping me today and so was Casey,” I said.

“Helping you with her tongue down your throat?” Keegan screamed.

“Hey, it wasn’t like that Keegan. This wasn’t some random hook up,” Jagger interjected.

“Shut the fuck up Jagger. Nobody asked you,” he said angrily.

At that very moment Jagger’s dad pulled up and my mom and Baylen were right behind him.

“Please just go Keegan,” I begged.

I didn’t want him to share what happened with the rest of my family or Jagger’s dad. He looked at me and shook his head. He was clenching his car keys so tightly that I thought he might hurt himself.

Jagger jumped up. “I gotta go, Brees. Please call me so we can talk,” she said, squeezing my hand.

I nodded, but didn’t speak. I didn’t even know what to say. She walked off and gave Keegan a look of pity, before climbing into her dad’s truck.

“Brees, how could you? Did our love mean nothing to you? I truly love you. I just needed time to adjust to our moms’ engagement and you couldn’t even give me that?” he said, looking at me with such hatred.

“Time? I’ve been sitting over her drowning without you Kee! Drowning! Someone showed me some affection and I accepted it because my heart is so broken because of you!” I screamed.

“What did we walk in on,” Baylen asked, as he and my mom approached the porch.

“Nothing!” I shouted, giving Keegan a pleading look.

“Bay, Missy, thank you for coming to my going away party today. It meant a lot. I’ll see you all at Thanksgiving,” Keegan said, walking towards his car.

“No problem Kee, you good though?” Baylen asked, walking after him.

“Yeah. Just need to get out of here and get my mind right for training camp. Best of luck next week when you head out dude. Arizona is lucky to have the best left tackle this side of the Mississippi!” Keegan said, giving Baylen a brief hug.

He got into his car and started to back away. I could see the hurt in his face. The pain that I had put there with my carelessness. I loved Keegan Patts so much, but this was the end of us. The end of what I thought would be forever. How did we get here?

I wasn’t sure how and I wasn’t sure when, but I had to win back Keegan’s heart. I had to show him that I loved him so much that it hurt. But first I had to deal with the Jagger situation. I did care for her, but I wasn’t sure this was best for our friendship. She was leaving soon and that wouldn’t be able to blossom into anything serious. I pushed the idea of her being with me out of my head. I couldn’t date her. I just couldn’t. Maybe in time, but not right now. Tomorrow I must go see her and I must let her know this can’t happen again.