Ch. 6: Past

Leonhardt Dietrich’s Point of View

  Pagpasok ko sa wing ko, I loosened my tie and tossed it on the dresser. Pakiramdam ko pati damit ko, bumigat sa stress ng buong araw. I didn’t want to see her. Hindi pa nga nagsisimula nang maayos lahat, pagod na ako.

  I grabbed a glass from the mini-bar, poured some bourbon. Hindi na ako naupo. Tumayo lang ako ro’n, staring out the window habang binabayo ng ulan ang salamin. Then, tumunog ang phone ko. Tsk.

  Ashlie: You looked miserable. Why marry her if you still hate the idea of love?

  Napapikit nalang ako, jaw tightening in frustration. Bago ko pa madelete ang thread, another text popped up.

  Ashlie: You don’t have to do this. We can fix us, Leon. I still love you.

  Damn it. Hindi pa rin ba siya susuko. I was about to delete it when I heard the door creak behind me.

  "Kasama 'ba sa kontrata ang pag-iinsulto ng ex mo sa akin?" Matalim na sabi ni Ingrid, hindi rin nawala yung pagod sa boses niya. I turned slowly. Nakatayo siya roon, naka-pajamas na, ang buhok niya medyo basâ pa rin, may hawak pa na towel at cell sa kabila. Her eyes flicked to my phone, then back to me.

  “So, you're still texting her, ha.” she snorted, her voice was so low and dangerous. Hindi ko siya sinagot. Wala naman akong tamang sagot dito.

  “Wow,” she scoffed, stepping further inside. “Wala pang 24hours tayong ikinasal pero ex mo pa rin ang iniisip mo? Pwedi bang pakisabi sa kanya na lubayan niya ako?”

  “She texted me,” I gritted my teeth, struggling to stay calm. “Hindi nga ako nag-reply.”

  “Pero binasa mo naman diba? Alam mo bang ginugulo niya ako? Magkasabwat ba kayo?” Her hands trembled in her side. “You could've blocked her. Pero hinayaan mo.”

  I threw the phone onto the bar with a loud thud. "You want honesty, Ingrid? Fine. Oo, nag-text siya. Oo, binasa ko. Because part of me still wants to understand why she destroyed everything."

  “And marrying me helps with that, huh?” singhal niya. “Ginawa mo lang pala akong distraction.”

  “Don’t twist this—”

  “Damn it, Leonhardt! Hindi ko rin naman ginusto 'to!” Her voice cracked. “Pero at least sinusubukan ko! Pero naman 'wag nyo naman akong idamay sa gulo niyo.”

  I stepped closer. "So am I." I answered not minding the last what she said.

  “Bullshit,” she spat. “You don’t even see me. All you see is her shadow. And me? I’m here, pretending this cold fucking condo is a home, habang ikaw, nagpapakasaya pa, isama mo pa 'yang ex mo. Puñeta magsama nalang talaga kayo.”

  She pressed a hand against her chest, breathing heavily. “I don’t care kung mahal mo pa siya. But don’t drag me down with you kung hindi ka rin naman lalaban.”

  That hit deeper than I wanted to admit. Tinitigan ko siya ng mariin. And for the first time, really looked. She wasn’t crying, but you could see she wanted to. Her chest rose with heavy breaths, fists clenched tight. Namumutla na rin ang balat niya sa lamig. And under all that anger is fear. Not fear of me, but fear of being left to drown alone.

  “I’m not asking you to save me,” she whispered, stepping back. “Pero ‘wag mo rin akong tuluyan na lunurin.”  And with that, she walked out na iniwang bukas ang pinto. Her words lingered like smoke in the air.

  Ashlie's name blinked again on the screen. Pero this time, hindi ko na binuksan. I turned the phone off. Some ghosts weren’t worth resurrecting. At siguro, mas masakit pa itong katahimikan na iniwan ni Ingrid kaysa kahit anong sigawan.

✧✧✧

  The morning after, tahimik lang ang buong mansion. Halos marinig ko pa nga ang tunog ng second hand ng grandfather clock sa hallway.

  I stayed in my wing longer than usual. I wasn’t avoiding her, I was avoiding what came next. Ang pamilya ko.

  Pagbaba ko sa main hall, nandun na agad sina Uncle Joel, tita Juna, at si Rachel, my cousin. Nakaayos na parang may pupuntahang opera, kahit breakfast pa lang. Of course, press appearances were everything to them.

  “Ah, there he is,” my uncle said with a tight smile. “The newly married heir.”

  “Where’s your wife, Leon?” Tita Juna asked, sipping her black coffee. “O baka naman you already scared her off?”

  I gave her a dry smile. “She’s upstairs.”

  “Sleeping in or crying?” sabat naman ni Rachel.

  I didn’t respond. Instead, I sat across them, grabbing a slice of toast. Silence stretched, until my uncle leaned forward.

  “So, what’s the verdict? Maganda nga ba talaga siyang trophy o tinik sa lalamunan?”

  Napatingin ako sa kanya dahil sa sinabi niya. “She’s not a trophy, tito. She’s my wife.”

  “A wife you didn’t even look at during the ceremony,” Rachel nodded, crossing her legs, amused. “You think people didn’t notice?”

  “They noticed enough,” I muttered. “Which means the press ate it up. 'Yun lang naman ang mahalag, right?”

  Tito Joel chuckled. “He learned the language of the family.”

  Then suddenly, there's heels clicking. Lahat kami napalingon. It's Ingrid. She walked down the stairs slowly, composed pero ramdam mo ang tensyon sa bawat hakbang niya. She wore a simple beige dress, her hair up, skin pale, and eyes blank.

  Pero ang ganda niya. Even in silence, kuha pa rin niya ang atensyon ng buong silid. Tita Juna stood up. “Oh, finally. The bride emerges.”

  “Apologies,” Sabi ni Ingrid ng mahinahon. Hindi mo halata na nagkasagutan kami kagabi. Na akala mo matagal na kami nagsasama. “I didn’t know there was a family inspection scheduled.”

  Napangisi naman si Tita Juna. “You’ll get used to it. We’re big on performance here.”

  “I grew up surrounded by politicians,” Ingrid replied, taking her seat beside me. “Performances don’t scare me.” Ramdam na ramdam ko ang presensya niya sa tabi ko, kasing lamig ng ulan sa gabi na kahit malayo pero hindi pa rin natinag. Bumuntong hininga ako.

  Tito Joel leaned back, observing her. “So, tell us, Ingrid. What’s the plan now that you’re part of the Dietrich line? Charity events? Babies? Or just existing for headlines?” Bubuka na sana ako ng bibig para putulin siya, pero nauna nang magsalita si Ingrid.

  “I’m not here to be paraded,” she said calmly. “I’ll fulfill the contract as required, but don’t expect me to smile and nod for your games.”

  Wala namang umimik sa amin ng ilang minuto, pero bigla nalang may humalakhak na galing kay tito Joel.

  “Feisty,” ani niya habang patango-tango, sipping his whiskey despite the hour. “No wonder you picked her.”

  “I didn’t pick her,” I said, my voice colder than I intended. “I signed a deal.”

  Everyone went quiet again. Napalingon naman ako kay Ingrid. She was staring straight ahead, her chin lifted. She didn’t flinch. Pero 'yung mga kamay niya? Clenched on her lap. And I hated that I always noticed her. Because it meant I still cared, even just a little.

  "Sulitin nyo na ang almusal nyo," sambit ko habang tumatayo. "Marami pa kaming kailangang ayusin." Ingrid stood with me, just as poised.

  Aalis na sana kami ng biglang magsalita si Rachel , “Careful, Ingrid. The Dietrich name cuts deeper than any knife. Especially when worn like protection.”

  Napatigil naman si Ingrid, then looked over her shoulder. “Good thing I stopped bleeding a long time ago.”

  Hindi na siya naghintay ng sagot. Basta na lang siya naglakad palayo sa hall. And me? Of cours, sinundan ko na siya. Because for once, someone had outplayed my family. And it wasn’t me.