Chapter 22

SEBASTIAN

I could feel her breath quicken as I spoke into her neck.

"You're delusional," she said, hee voice calm despite her hitched breath.

I chuckled.

"Maybe, or I am right."

I lifted my head until our eyes met again.

"Why does your body contrast those hateful eyes so much?"

"My body and my eyes convey the same message," she hissed. "With all due respect, you make my skin crawl, Alpha."

I smiled at that.

"Of course."

I snaked an arm around her waist and pullee her into me until there was no space between our bodies.

"Why don't I trust you?"

"I neither know, nor do i care," she replied defiantly. "If you would excuse me, I'd like to take my leave."

"And if I don't?" I asked. "What would you do?"

"Do you really want to do this here?"she asked as she gently squirmed in my arm, trying to create any sort of distance even though she knew it was futile. "Sienna is just a few paces away."

"Since when did you care about Sienna?" I asked as my eyes trailed down to her breasts again. "Even to the untrained eye, you both are not exactly fond of the other."

She was silent for a minute this time.

I could feel her forcing herself to breathe properly until her breath was no longer hitched and her chest rose and fell in a regular rhythm.

When she spoke, her voice was calm but final. There was no indignation in it, no anger, or defiance. It was a simple request. One devoid of any emotion.

"Could you please let me go?"

For a second, I was frozen.

Her attitude had changed after the words I said.

"If you don't then we can stay like this for as long as you want, but Sienna is going to come knocking soon."

I slowly let go off her to look into her eyes properly and I met pure indifference.

"You somehow are much worse than I thought you were," she said coldly. "You think I hate Sienna because of you? You think you're so important because everyone fawns over you, don't you? You think you're the only thing on everyone's minds."

I was dumbfounded by those words but she already turned and placed her hand on the door knob.

"I did not give you permission to leave, Athena," I said. "What do I have to do, huh? Why do you insist on treating me like I am something vile?"

"Aren't you, Alpha Sebastian?" She asked without turning around. "Aren't you vile and disgusting?"

I had no words to reply and she didn't need it because she continued.

"What kind of man turns his mate into a plasma donor for his mistress while treating her like she was invisible? Frustrates her until she left him, and then immediately jumps on the opportunity to date his mistress and is now about to do a mating ceremony with her said mistress?"

She turned to look at me.

"Isn't he something vile and disgusting?"

She continued before I could answer.

"Now, the woman he rejected is back, but she's better. She doesn't need him, nor does she care about him. He has lost his control of her, and that hurts his ego, so now, he wants her back. He wants to be in control of the woman he discarded. He wants to dominate her while still possessing his mistress, and sate his inflated ego."

She took a step closer to me and angled her head up to look into my eyes.

"Isn't that man something vile and disgusting?" She asked. "You tell me."

I stared into those beautiful eyes and I couldn't tell what I felt.

Betrayal. Anger. Rage. Guilt. Repentance.

"You have no idea what you're talking about," I said as I backed away from her. "You can leave."

She stared at me for a second longer than I thought she would and then turned the doorknob and walked out, closing it gently behind her.

Those words hurt me more than anything she's told me.

They hurt me a lot more than when she said she hated me.

It gave me much more insight and perspective into her feelings. A lot more than I needed.

"So, that's what she thinks of me?" I said out loud.

An egoistic scumbag and serial cheat with a domination complex.

The thought enraged me.

Not because she was wrong about me, but because she was wrong about the circumstances.

I was in fact everything she mentioned.

Personally, I think I am worse than she thinks.

But, I didn't treat her that way because I was what she thought.

I am not treating her the way I am because I wanted to regain control over her.

Despite my selfishness and ego, I made a sacrifice for her.

I sacrificed myself, my feelings, my desires to have her all to myself. I sacrificed the very idea of my character just to give her a chance to find happiness.

So this was what it looked like on the outside.

While I rationalized my actions with my intentions, she saw them as the heartless actions of a vile and disgusting man.

The thought hurt.

Even if I was to everyone else, I didn't want Athena to see me as something this twisted.

I convinced myself that I could handle her hating me, but I couldn't handle the look on her when she said those words.

The indifference and passivity in that look. Like I was nothing that could ever affect her or provoke a reaction or emotion out of her.

That looks was unbearable to witness.

It made me feel so small.

So insignificant.

The door opened and Nathan strolled in with a somewhat sneaky approach, like he was trying to not make any noise.

"What are you doing?" I asked as he tiptoed to a seat.

"You seemed like you were brooding, Alpha," he replied as he sat down. "I didn't want to disturb."

"Nathan," I sighed as I leaned into my seat. "Am I vile and disgusting?"