5

I spent 10 mimutes contemplating if I should open the door or just stay in my room and tell everyone I'm sick.

I know that I should go and spend time with my parents and Mother-in-law but mayroong maliit na part sa pagkatao ko na ayaw silang makita. Mahirap pa rin sa akin na harapin sila knowing the state of my relationship with Lucian. I've been trying and trying for years pero para talagang wala itong patutunguhan. Im tired, I might as well just give up. 

Dumagdag pa ang madalas naming pag aaway at ang hindi nya pag uwi sa bahay. I'm scared na baka may makakita na kakilala ko kila Lucian at sa Kabit nya and ask for confirmation to me. I treasure my reputation more than anything else, That is how I was raised by my parents as a child. Kaya nga sobra nalang ang effort ko para sa aming dalawa. 

I took a deep breath in and out bago ko pinihit ang doorknob at nagdesisyon na lumabas. It would be a stupid and obvious move kung hindi ako magpapakita. They will have an idea and will soon start to ask questions as to what is the current state of my marriage. I calmed myself down from the thought that flows like an angry river in my head. Habang pababa ng hagdan ay iniisip ko na ang mga tanong na maaari nilang ibato sa akin o amin ni Lucian at sa kung ano ang isasagot ko dito.

"----- Chocolate Croissants --- Pain Au Chocolat is really ----." 

"I can't wait to meet my apo. I ----." 

I heard voices coming from the sala. Peeking through the small opening of the door. I saw my parents munching of the desserts I brought earlier. My grandmother was sniffing the fresh flowers while my Grandfather is inspecting the interior of the house, he was saying something to Aunt Mely but his voice was to faint and I can't understand it. Ate Lory was sitting in the sofa infront of my parents laughing and narrating the time she went to Brazil and ate a snake she caught by a stick in a small cave. Lahat sila ay nagtatawanan sa kwento nya.

"I can do this." I whispered to myself before walking to the sala. 

"Oh my god! Look at you, darling you look so good!" Aunt Mely screamed as soon as she saw me entering through the door.

Niyakap nya ako ng sobrang higpit. It was a bit uncomfy because hindi ako makahinga but I still wrapped my hands around her and hugged her back. She kissed my cheek bago ako hinila para tuluyang pumasok. My parents stopped eating and stood up to greet me, as well as my grandparents.

"Ang Ivy ko ang laki laki na." Grand Ida pinched my cheek and squished them.

Ginulo ni Grandpops ang buhok ko at tumawa ng malakas. "Syempre apo ko 'yan. Nasa dugo na ng pamilya natin ang pagiging maganda at gwapo."

Hinila naman ako ni Dad at pinaupo sa sofa kaharap ng isa pang sofa kung saan nakaupo si Ate Lory at Aunt Mely. Tumingin ako sa paligid hoping to see hi mbut he was not there. But Ate Lory is here? According to her kahit saan sya magpunta ay palaging nakabuntot sa kanya si Lewis. I can't hide the fact that dissapointed a little. I was kind of expecting him to be here but knowing his relationship with Lucian I know he wouldn't really bother to come.

"Have you eaten already? Have some Cream Bread." Naglagay si Dad ng isang Mango Cream bread sa platito at akmang maglalagay pa ng isa ng bigla syang sawayin ni Mama.

"Too much sweets is bad for pregnant women, Dane." Aniya nito at inalis sa kamay ni Dad ang platito na may isang Cream Bread at inabot ito sa akin. "Here have one!"

I awkwardly laughed. "But I-im not pregnant, Mom."