Prologue

Erin’s POV

Icy cold rain belted against my face as I slowly forced my eyes open. Everything was dark and blurry, but I could make out branches moving above me while thick grey fog curled between the trees.

I blinked several times, trying to clear my vision.

Wet leaves stuck to my cheek, and mud had soaked through my clothes until they clung painfully to my skin.

“Carlos?” His name slipped from my mouth before I could stop it.

Nothing answered except the rain.

I swallowed, closing my eyes again.

Why had I called for him?

Carlos wasn’t coming to help me. He hadn’t helped me in months.

I tried to push myself up, but my arms started shaking. The second I lifted my head, pain exploded through it.

I gasped, falling back down. My face smashed into the mud and wet leaves.

I couldn’t remember a thing. My mind was foggy. Everything inside me felt heavy and tingly.

I grabbed my stomach as hot cramps tightened around my stomach.

“No.”

I rolled onto my side, every inch of me screaming in protest. I moved my hands frantically over my stomach. Nothing, no kick.

Tears streamed down my face, mixing with the rain. 

I pushed hard, pausing, waiting desperately for a kick.

“Come on. Please.”

Still nothing.

“No, no, no.” I couldn’t breathe or think past the terror racing through me. My baby always moved when I touched him.

Always.

“Please, Mummy needs you to move.” I pressed my palm against the side of my stomach and waited.

A small kick beneath my hand. A sob burst from my lips as all the air I had been holding in rushed out of me.

“Oh, thank the goddess.” I fell back onto the wet ground and kept both hands pressed tightly against my stomach.

I closed my eyes and tried to force myself to remember.

The warehouse. Flashed into my head.

The same cold, damp room Carlos had kept me locked inside for months. The tiny window had been too high for me to reach, and the only place I had to sleep was a thin mattress pushed against the wall.

I had been sitting on that mattress with my back against the cold concrete when I heard the rusty old lock scrape open.

Carlos hadn’t come to see me in days.

The door opened, and he walked inside. His eyes moved straight to my stomach, and his lip curled up in disgust.

He hadn’t been there in days, and he hadn’t brought any food.

“Carlos?” 

“Julia gave birth last night.” He stepped further into the room, his eyes never leaving my belly.

“Five months, Erin. Five months pregnant and she gave birth to a healthy boy. Exactly how a werewolf pregnancy is supposed to happen.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I need you to understand me.” His voice hardened as he looked down at me. “You have been pregnant for almost ten months. Ten!”

“There is nothing wrong with our baby or me. He is alive. His heart is strong. He's just taking a little longer.”

Carlos ran a hand through his hair, looking away.

“So was mine and Julia’s son. The difference is hers isn’t a fucking monster.” his wolf flashed through his eyes.

“Don’t call him that.”

“What else am I supposed to call it, Erin?” Carlos snapped his hands flying up as he came towards me. “A normal pup would have been born four months ago. Instead, you’re still carrying something no doctor can explain while half my pack whispers that their Luna is cursed.”

“He’s your son.”

“Julia gave me a son.”

I swallowed against the pain growing in my throat.

“Then go be with her.”

Carlos stared down at me. His eyes cold and distant. 

“Make Julia your Luna. Raise her baby as your heir. I won’t fight you. Just let me take my baby and leave.”

Carlos’s face hardened. “You think I can just let you walk away with it?”

“Why not? You don’t want us. No one…”

“That isn’t the fucking point.” He snapped, stepping closer. “You don’t get to walk out of here and parade that thing in front of every pack in the country. Ten months, Erin. Look at yourself. You’re a fucking embarrassment.”

I pulled my knees up in front of me, wrapping my arms around them as if I could shield my baby from his words. 

“The second anyone sees you, they’ll talk. And when that thing finally claws its way out of you, they’ll want to see what kind of freak their Alpha created.” His eyes lifted to mine. “I won’t let you humiliate me like that.”

“I don’t care what they say!”

“Well, I do!” he shouted. “I have a pack to lead. A name to protect.”

I stared up at him as my fear slowly turned cold.

“Carlos, please.” I crawled towards him and reached for his hand. Desperate to talk some sense into him.  I reached for his hand. “Please.”

His fingers closed around mine as he crouched down in front of me. His thumb brushed over my knuckles the same way it used to when everything between us had still been good.

This gave me hope. A father couldn't really hurt his own child, right?

His face twisted in the next second, and his hand slammed into my shoulder and shoved me backwards.

My back hit the wall hard. Pain shot through me.

“Ah—” I folded forward and wrapped both arms around my belly as it cramped.

Carlos stayed staring down at me with rage burning in his eyes.

He had once loved me.

At least, I had believed he did.

My chest began to ache worse than my back, and Blue let out a weak, broken whimper inside my head.

We could both see what he was about to do.

“I, Carlos Serrano, Alpha of the Silver Moon Pack, reject you, Erin Westwood, as my mate—and the abomination inside you as my heir.”

All the air left my body. I fell forward and caught myself on shaking arms as his rejection ripped through the bond that had connected us for years.

Blue screamed loudly inside my head.

One hand clutched my chest, the other my stomach as tears spilled down my face.

He really did it.

The man I had once loved, the mate I had spent years believing would protect me, had finally cut me free.

I sucked in a shaking breath and forced myself to look at him.

“I accept your rejection.”

Carlos’s eyes flashed, and his teeth clenched as he blocked out the pain.

But I didn’t.

I let myself feel it because I was no longer his mate.

I was free.

I could leave now.

I could take my baby somewhere far away and build a life without him.

Using the wall, I slowly pushed myself up.

“I’ll be gone before morning.”

“You really are that stupid, aren’t you?” Carlos laughed. “You can’t leave with that child.”

He came toward me.

My heart raced as I tried to get away from him, but there was nowhere to go.

“Carlos, no.”

I shoved at his chest, trying to force him back, but I was too weak. 

His hand grabbed the back of my neck.

“Let me go!” I fought him.

Something sharp stabbed into the side of my neck.

I gasped and reached for it, but Carlos held me still.

“What did you—”

My tongue felt heavy, the words dying inside me.

“You made me do this.” He threw me to the floor.

The room blurred. My body tingling but heavy.

My eyes opened fast.

Carlos.

He had brought me here. To get rid of me and my baby. Blue whimpered inside me. Lightning split across the sky, and a crack of thunder followed loudly, making me flinch.

The rain was getting heavier.

My body shook violently as I grabbed hold of a tree trunk and dragged myself to my feet.

“Erin, we can’t stay here,” Blue warned.

“I know.”

I pushed away from the tree and forced my shaking legs to work.

“How long can you stay with me?” I asked Blue.

“At most half an hour.”

Since Carlos had locked me in the warehouse and barely fed me, Blue had grown weaker every day. Most days she could only stay awake for an hour before disappearing back inside me.

“Half an hour is enough.”

It had to be.

I reached for the next tree, but before I made it there, pain suddenly tightened across my stomach.

“No…”I buckled at the knees and slammed into the mud.

Biting down hard on my bottom lip. cramp grew stronger and stronger, but I forced myself to breathe through them.

In and out.

In and—

Another one hit.

“Ahh!”

I curled in on my stomach as my nails dug into the mud.

No, goddess, no.

I couldn’t have my baby here.

I pushed myself onto my hands and knees and started crawling forward, digging my fingers into the mud as I dragged myself through it.

“Please,” I begged through gritted teeth. “Goddess… please.”

The pain pushed lower, building. Something warm spilled between my legs. Slowly, I looked down at my dress and watched blood mix with the rain and mud beneath me.

“Oh goddess”, I sobbed. 

The pain was too much; I couldn't take it.  Fire spread through my chest.

Something pulled painfully tight inside me. Pulling and pulling.

Until it snapped.

“No,” I screamed.

Blue howled inside my head.

My hands moved across my stomach, searching for him.

He had moved before.

I had felt him.

Blue’s howl turned into a broken cry, and I squeezed my eyes shut.

I knew.

Goddess, I knew.

My baby was dead.