Chapter 1

“How many times do I have to tell you that you need to focus on your studies, not your talent?” I can now see the veins on his neck while looking at me. He even grits his teeth and clenches his fist as if he is now ready to kill me but I just shrug my shoulders. I’m still studying but the way he reacts makes me roll my eyes. Good thing, I know how to control my emotions.

Ever since my parents fight for some reason, I decide to train myself not to show my emotions to someone because once I do that, they’ll use that weakness against me and I don’t like that. Later on, my parents decide to separate and I am just 14 years old at that time. My mother left me here in our house while my dad always focus on his work and he rarely come home.

A year later, one of our maids said that my mom married someone else. She forgets about me. She forgets her child. At that time, I don’t know what to feel. Questions fill my brain and my heart fills with anger and sadness. I’m her child but why did she leave me? 

“You’re still a student, Kyna. You shouldn’t be focusing on your talent because talent can wait but to finish your study? No.” He massages his temple and turns his back on me. He reaches for the glass of water on the table and starts drinking it.

When did he care about me? He only cares about his wealth, not his only daughter. I look at him and said, “Why do I need to choose when I can do both?” I walk to my room not minding him shouting in the hallway. No matter what he said, I’m not going to follow him.

I know, I should respect him even if he broke his marriage with my mom but what can I do? I’m just their child who seeks attention and love for her parents. They don’t even think of me nor ask my opinion regarding their decision if I’m okay with it or not. They just decide as if I’m not existing as their child. Do you think, they deserve to be respected here in the first place, it’s their fault?

Yes, I don’t know the reason but can you blame me? Tears roll on my cheeks, remembering our memories. I love them but why can’t they love me back?

I close the door of my room right away before my dad catches me. He only visits me here whenever I do something wrong which I don’t consider something wrong. It’s just that, he doesn’t understand me. The reason why I also choose my talent is for the sake of my mental health. I don’t want to pressure myself in studying. Once I do that and get a low grade like 89, I will be disappointed because I didn’t reach 90.

My forehead wrinkled when my notebooks and make-up were scattered on my desk. “Goodness! Why did I forget to clean my mess before I go to school?” I whisper and shook my head. I open my bag and take my phone to check if my mom is on her social media account but to my surprise, the news appears in my newsfeed that makes my mouth part.

“Adelaide Viamonte finally open her museum in Las Vegas.”

A smile appears on my lips due to the headline. Her fans can now finally see her artwork and take a picture of it. This is the reason why I’m trying to manage my time and enhance my talent so that I can also show it to everyone.

I admire my mom for choosing her career although I also want her attention but what can I do except on supporting her secretly even if she’s already married? There’s still a trace of bitterness and anger but as the time passed by, I have no choice but accept it.

I am interrupted by the notification I receive so I quickly tap the message button to see who send me a direct message. My eyebrow raises straightaway the moment I see the person who intervenes in my thoughts.

“Kyna, we have a practice later.”

I sat on the edge of my bed and close my eyes. I want to relax because of what happened earlier but I think, I can set aside that for now so I type a message instantly.

“Noted. What time, Serene?”

I tap the send button and relax my back on my bed but my eyes widen when I heard my phone ring. I immediately reach for my phone and answer it.

“8:00 p.m., Kyna. Do you have your driver?” she interrogated.

I sigh and stare at my ceiling, “My dad.”

I heard her laugh for a bit and said, “We’ll pick you up later.”

“Thanks, Serene. Until what time our practice will be?” I think I should start cleaning my desk now before going out with my friends. I start putting my lipsticks one by one in the drawer while waiting for her answer.

“3 a.m., we need to practice for our new song.” My forehead creased when she mentioned that we have a new song. “Did Gavin tell you about that?” she added.

“No, who compose that?” I put my phone on the desk and turn it on the loudspeaker, I start to put my notebooks on the bookshelves when I’m done with my make-up.

“Katty and Gavin,” she simply answer so I nod my head even if she can’t see me.

“I’ll hang up now. See you later!” and she taps the end button right away. It’s still 7 p.m. what shall I do before they fetch me?

“I think, I need to write a song lyrics since I have a sample of an instrument that I made days ago,” I utter and get the paper and ball pen. I play the recorded instrument on my phone and close my eyes.