Chapter Four

The Night We Finally Met

March 25, 2023.

I had been waiting for that day for months.

By then, Justin had become part of my everyday life. We had started talking in December, when I was bored and hurting and had created a dating-app account without expecting anything serious to come from it.

Somehow, he had stayed.

The messages became phone calls. The phone calls became late-night conversations. Before I realized it, I had become used to hearing his voice.

I still didn't know exactly what we were.

We had never sat down and called ourselves boyfriend and girlfriend, but after months of talking, I believed there was something between us.

Something real.

So when we finally decided to meet, I was excited.

And terrified.

I still had work that day, which was probably a good thing because it kept me from thinking about the meeting every second.

But as my shift came to an end, my nerves started getting worse.

I knew I couldn't go home looking the way I wanted to and then risk someone from Vince's family seeing me.

I was still working for my in-laws.

Even though Vince had betrayed me, I was still conscious of how his family might judge me.

I had spent so long dressing respectfully around them that wearing something different almost felt rebellious.

After work, I changed into jeans and a crop top that showed my boobs. I tied my hair neatly into a bun and looked at myself in the mirror.

For a moment, I hesitated.

What if someone sees me?

Then I remembered everything I had been through.

Vince had married another woman.

His family had known.

And somehow, I was still worried about whether they would approve of my clothes.

I shook my head.

"Not tonight."

I was going to see Justin.

I wanted to look good.

Still, the confidence didn't stop the nerves.

Before leaving, I had a can of alcohol.

I wasn't trying to get drunk. I was just nervous and wanted something to calm me down.

It didn't help much.

My heart was still beating fast.

I checked my phone.

Justin: Are you coming?

I smiled.

Me: I'm trying.

Getting a taxi turned into another problem.

I stood outside waiting, watching taxi after taxi pass.

Some were full.

Some didn't stop.

Others simply drove past me.

I became frustrated.

"Seriously?"

I checked my phone again.

Justin: Where are you?

Me: I'm struggling to get a taxi.

Eventually, I managed to find one.

I climbed inside and gave the driver the location.

As we drove, I stared out the window.

My mind wouldn't stop.

What if it's awkward?

What if he doesn't like me?

What if we aren't the same in person?

I had spent months talking to this man.

I knew his voice.

I knew his jokes.

I knew the way he could make me laugh when I didn't feel like smiling.

But I had never stood in front of him.

Until that night.

When I finally saw him, something inside me settled.

There was no awkwardness.

No strange silence.

No feeling that I was meeting a stranger.

I looked at him and it honestly felt like I had known him for years instead of months.

We started talking almost immediately.

It was exactly like our phone conversations, except now I could see his face while he spoke.

We laughed.

We teased each other.

We talked about everything and nothing.

The hours passed without me noticing.

I felt comfortable around him.

Too comfortable.

And maybe that was why I allowed myself to believe that what we had was more than it actually was.

I thought the months of talking meant something.

I thought finally meeting meant we were taking the next step.

I thought he saw me the way I saw him.

I didn't know that he didn't see me as his girlfriend.

I didn't know that, in his mind, the night meant something completely different.

I thought there was something growing between us.

He hadn't promised me anything, but I had filled in the blanks myself.

And because I believed there was something between us, I didn't question the closeness.

I simply enjoyed the night.

For those few hours, I wasn't thinking about Vince.

I wasn't thinking about his wedding.

I wasn't thinking about his family.

I wasn't the woman who had been betrayed.

I was just Amara.

And I was happy.

By the time morning came, I couldn't believe how quickly the night had passed.

Eventually, I decided I needed to go home.

I tried to arrange a taxi for myself, but I was struggling with the booking.

He gave me his phone so I could use it.

I started arranging the ride.

Then, because I'm naturally curious, I started looking around his phone.

I wasn't planning to search through everything.

At least, that's what I told myself.

But then I saw messages.

Women.

Different women.

There were several conversations, and some of them were clearly flirtatious.

I stopped.

I didn't scroll any further.

My heart sank.

I had spent the entire night believing that maybe I meant something to him.

Now I was wondering if I was just another woman in his phone.

I didn't ask him.

I didn't confront him.

I simply stopped searching and went back to trying to arrange my taxi.

Eventually, the taxi arrived.

I got inside.

As we started driving, I suddenly remembered something.

I looked at the driver.

"Who's paying for the taxi?"

He checked his phone.

"Liam."

I frowned.

"Liam?"

"Yes."

I stared at him.

"Who's Liam?"

He looked at me through the mirror.

"The guy who ordered the taxi."

My stomach tightened.

Liam.

That wasn't the name I knew.

The man I had spent months talking to had introduced himself to me as Justin.

Justin.

Not Liam.

For a moment, I didn't know what to say.

I could have asked the driver more questions.

I could have called him immediately.

I could have confronted him.

But I didn't.

I simply looked out of the window.

I didn't tell him that I had heard the name.

I didn't ask why the driver had called him Liam.

I kept quiet.

Maybe I was afraid of the answer.

Maybe I didn't want to ruin what I thought we had.

Or maybe I had learned from Vince that people revealed their secrets when you stopped forcing them to explain themselves.

So I said nothing.

I continued to know him as Justin.

But now there was another name sitting quietly in the back of my mind.

Liam.

I didn't know which one was real.

I didn't know why he had given me a different name.

And I didn't know how many other things about him I hadn't discovered yet.

All I knew was that I had arrived that night believing I was meeting someone who was becoming important to me.

And I was leaving with questions I wasn't ready to ask.

Still, a part of me believed there was something between us.

That was the part I didn't understand yet.

Because sometimes the person you think you're getting close to is standing right beside you...

while an entire part of their life remains hidden from you.