Lahat ng Kabanata ng Was It Worth It Taking The Risk: Kabanata 1 - Kabanata 10

Ang buhay ay isang laro. Dapat kang manalo, pero dapat ay tumatanggap ka ng pagkatalo. Kasi hindi ka naman laging panalo. Winning isn't always winning. Because in every failure, there's a lesson to learn. There is knowledge to acquire, and new beginnings to start. Sa buhay ko naman, marami ang pagkakamali, ganon rin ang aral. Sa bawat maling desisyon, may bagong pinto para sa diskusyon. A right balance of regrets and right decisions. I had to remind myself a couple of times about the lessons. Sometimes, it would slip away from me, but I am thankful that I had a great hold of it. I had to have principles. I had to have something to stand on. I had to have something to hold on, to believe on. "Happy Birthday and Congratulations, Tali!" My friends cheered the moment I opened the door of the bar. Iunupahan ba nila ang buong bar? "Thank you, guys! This is really much appreciated!" I thanked them. They throw a party for my birthday, at sakto pa na lumabas ang resulta ng board exam pa

Wala akong interest sa mga relasyon, at mas lalong wala akong pake o alam pagdating sa pagmamahal na ‘yan. Hindi ‘yan totoo, pwera nalang kung familial.Bakit? Dahil hindi naman talaga totoo ‘yon. My mother had to suffer through things alone. My father left us for another woman he'll marry. Kung may pagmamahal, bakit mas pinili ng tatay kong iwan ang mama ko kahit na alam niyang may anak sila? Kung may pagmamahal bakit kami iniwan? Hindi pa ‘yon nasasagot.I don't want to be like her. I should be wise enough. Gusto ko ng sex? Sige, pero mag iingat ako. Hindi ako pa-pabuntis. Wala akong plano para ‘don."If I didn't offer you a ride, you'd probably go with London," his cold baritone voice.Ngumisi ako."I wouldn't ride with him. I'd ask to ride with you instead.”"Don't fool around," he scoffed.Humarap siya sa akin. His face was dark, only lighted by the faint lights in the parking lot. "I'm not, Psalm Saint," I matched his stare.His eyes were daggers and cold. What I love the most

Commitment is not needed when you only want sex. I don't need some reassurance for a fucking promise when I only want a dick and good performer to give me the pleasure I want. I have been called so many names. I have been told so many unreasonable words. I have been through bullying. I have struggled a lot since I was a kid. Giving myself good sex and pleasure now is my way of thinking I had it good. At least, hindi ako mamatay na virgin, ‘di ba? Sex without commitment is a win-win situation for me. Because I had no plans in entering a damn relationship. It would only cause me heartbreak, tears, and all that matters. I have no time to waste on a damn lose case. Walang lugar sa akin ang mga relasyon. Hindi naman kasi totoo ‘yon. Malay ko bang nakikipagrelasyon lang ang iba kasi uso? Si mama ko nga, iniwan, e. “Mmmm. . . Ah!” ungol ko. Shit. I didn't know I was this flexible! Damn it! Fuck! He then slowly started thrusting. I matched his thrust by moving my waist. Naka angat

Ang kapal naman ng mukha ng lalaking ‘to para sabihing tumutulo ang laway ko sa kaniya! Nilapag ko sa island table ang dalawang pinggan na kinuha ko. Binalikan niya ang niluluto niya. I guess his cooking adobo. Ewan ko lang bakit adobo 'yan, e breakfast naman. "So you're admitting that. Masarap ako?" Tanong niya. He turned off the cooker, and get a bowl to put the adobo. Nagugutom na rin ako. Naamoy ko rin ang niluluto niya. "Hindi ka pa nasabihan dati niyan? Kawawa ka naman..." Sabi ko. I smirked when I saw his confused face. "I know girls like it but they don't really tell me that they like it," aniya. Nilapag niya ang bowl ng adobo sa island table. May kanin na rin roon kaya umupo na ako. "Bakit 'di mo itanong?" I started getting a plate. "What? Why would I ask? I already know..." Oh, mayabang. . . "Ah... Kaya hindi ka makapaniwala na may nagsabi sayo? Psalm, masarap ka..." Sumubo ako ng kanin na sinabawan ko ng sabaw ng adobo. He choked on his drink. "I know, Talli

Deal is sealed. No strings attached. Full commitment on sex, only. No other business than fucking. All the more, no asking of personal questions. Sex is what all there is to it. Sinalubong kami ni Ate Tar at sobra ang saya niya nang makitang kasama ko si Psalm. Ayos, ah? Mas masaya pa makakita ng lalaki kesa sa kapatid? “Tali!” She ran to me, but her eyes stayed behind my back, to Psalm. I scoffed. “Hello! You must be Psalm? Nice to meet you! I'm Tarla, Tali’s sister,” she smiled, then extended her hand. Umirap ako. Hindi niya man lang ako niyakap at agad lang na nagpakilala kay Psalm. Psalm extended his hand as well, to acknowledge my sister. He smiled. “I'm Psalm. Nice to meet you…” Tumango si Ate, may ngiti pa sa labi niya. “Kamusta kayo ni Tali? Hindi naman siya sakit sa ulo?” Nakangiting tanong niya. “Ate!” I exhaled. What the hell? Why is she asking? Bringing Psalm here is too much, already! Dadagdagan niya pa ba ang kahihiyan ko? Nakakaloka! Psalm chuckled. I shot