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Lahat ng Kabanata ng Belongs To Me : Kabanata 31 - Kabanata 40

54 Kabanata

31

He cleared his throat. "What about yours?"At that moment I realized that I had completely forgotten to call my mother. The last time I spoke to her was on Sunday, when she scolded me that she and her dad didn't know about Ollie's presence in town. Not that I was about to mention it. "I think it's fine... Dad is also at work from morning to night, they have a lot going on in the workshop." It had been like this for a few years and he was happy about it, but sometimes I also felt that he would he should have slowed down a bit."You know, good auto mechanics are few and far between," David remarked, but I almost thought it was a bit sarcastic. After all, the differences between our families were quite evident, and the fact was that my parents hated David's. And it was true and vice versa.I nodded. "Yeah, that's probably true."David scratched his jaw. "Dad, do you have a hairdresser for tomorrow?""What?" I asked confused."Well, for the party... it would probably be a good idea to get

32

Tate and I walked out of the movie theater into the hallway and I was a little drunk on her presence. I held her around the waist and she was lightly leaning against me. Despite the artificial lighting in the hallway, I noticed that her freckled face was all red and she was teething from ear to ear.A smile I would kill for.I was opening my mouth to poke her a little when she stopped abruptly."We still have to take a picture in front of that poster!" she blurted out, pointing to the World War Z poster.I grinned at her. "Like put it on Instagram and write how you liked the movie?""Like I'll print out the photo and put it above my bed, Haves," she corrected me angrily.I laughed and pulled her aside so the other visitors could pass us by. "I'm relieved because you don't know what the movie was about anyway."She frowned. "Brad Pitt was there!""So what?" I asked unconvinced.She frowned more and more as she thought hard. "Brad Pitt and a bunch of zombies?"I couldn't take it anymore

33

I decided to completely suppress the events of this morning and not think about them, otherwise I might as well collapse on the spot. That's why I just focused on today's party and the preparations for it.After the shower, I worked on my makeup, which I paid more attention to than usual. Then June arrived in the afternoon to do my hair. She asked what Ollie and I were doing and I rambled and rambled. I had no idea if she really believed everything, or if she already felt that she knew her stuff and it didn't matter what I actually said anyway. However, I had two glasses of wine with her and thanks to that she relaxed pleasantly for a while.She had to admit she did a good job. She combed a high bun on my head, from which individual strands of hair fell on my shoulders, and she also inserted small black pearls into the resulting work. Then she wanted to see the dress... and it's a wonder she didn't fall on the floor laughing. I wanted to pierce it with a fork, but I didn't have enough

34

I stood there like a pillar of salt - completely motionless and unable to speak. I replayed her words over and over and didn't understand where the resentment and coldness was coming from.Emily finally removed her hand from me and stood across from me with a look of hatred that she no longer bothered to hide."What do you really want from me?" I asked breathlessly.She smiled so sweetly that it made me freeze. "Without. Get out of here before you bring something much worse… and ideally don't come back.” And then she turned and walked away.Suddenly my lungs were getting no oxygen. I tried to breathe, but I couldn't. I didn't do well at all. There were too many people, too much talk, music and sensations.I turned on my heel, staggered through the guests into the lobby, and then ran upstairs. I slipped into the small bathroom opposite the staircase, locked the door behind me, and dazedly landed on the closed toilet. It was just in time, because my legs were already giving up.What the

35

I followed Ollie into Joe's Bistro, where we took a few steps through the space and stopped. Somewhere in the background there was a tuned rock radio, where the host had just announced that he was playing a cover of Alannis Morissette's You Oughta Know. I looked around. It was quite crowded on Saturday evening, the boxes along the walls and the tables were almost full. I glanced at Ollie and found him looking right at me.I smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. "What?"He shrugged without letting go of my hand. "I have a choice. I thought you might want to look at the menu," he explained, nodding his chin to the menu sign hanging above the counter.I shook my head. “You said they had great burgers and fries, didn't you? I don't have much to think about."Ollie ran his thumb over my palm, stirring the blood in my veins with that simple touch. “Mountain Dew? Or what do you fancy?""Mountain Dew will be fine," I agreed."Then go and sit down, I'll bring it," he told me with h

36

I cleared my throat. Once. Twice. That doesn't seem weird at all, does it? "Of course I'm not flirting."And his half-smile just turned devilish. "So when is your shift?"I fought for every breath. "Monday morning...I'll be on the morning shift all next week."He nodded in satisfaction and let me go. "I'm going out for coffee on Monday." He took his phone out of his pocket and glanced at the screen. "Shall we still go to that concert?""What?" The sudden change of subject had obviously confused me. Surely that must have been it.He put his cell phone away and started to put on his sweatshirt. "As I said before, Dead Souls are playing at Mads. I would quite like to see them. You're coming too, aren't you?"I bit my lip.Ollie stood up and zipped up. “Actually, I have to tell you, if you're going to crash, I'm going to put you in the car and drive you home anyway. I won't let you wander around town with a bare ass."This time I had to laugh. I reached for my jacket, put it on, and slung

37

I should be fine.I successfully finished school, I had a girlfriend, friends, I sang in a band that had hopes of breaking through...But.But the future was uncertain.Mom couldn't finance my little girl, and she wouldn't have if she could. Our relationship wasn't great before (actually it was pretty shitty), but ever since I shut up about James, it's kind of gone downhill because she decided to prioritize him over me. Yeah. Even though it was such a piece of shit. The only good thing was that James was obviously pissed off from our confrontation, and that's why they met at his house most of the time.So now I was working in the bistro full-time and occasionally working part-time at Bill's workshop. To make money, to save... and maybe one day fulfill my dream. The guys from the band and I have already talked about the fact that we will gradually start looking for a place to live in another city due to the fact that we didn't manage to get anywhere with the music here.I was looking f

38

Today was four days since my dad's heart attack. Four days in which mine and my mother's universe turned upside down. Over the weekend, we took turns at his hospital because we didn't want to leave him alone, if at least a little bit possible. And this despite the fact that the doctors reassured us that the heart attack was minor and dad's life is no longer in danger. But telling something like that to two nervous women was like talking to the wind.They did all the necessary examinations and over the weekend they gradually let him sit up, walk around the bed, and on Monday he had the mandatory careful walks around the entire floor. He seemed to be recovering well, but it was already clear that when he returned home he would have to undergo a major diet change, regular heart pills, and probably exercise later on. He needed to reduce his body weight due to elevated cholesterol and blood pressure, so there was no point.My father was definitely not happy about it. But since Danni wasn't

39

I had Bill's bag slung over my shoulder and was pacing the hospital corridor while he was checking out at reception, signing some forms and who knows what the hell. I did not pay attention.I thought about Tate and why we couldn't get things back together. I wanted. I wanted to do it every fucking day. I was even so bent over on Tuesday that I texted her. But I didn't decide to read the burning topic, which definitely didn't disappear anywhere.And why?I was probably afraid that instead of reconciliation it would just lead to another argument and everything would get worse.Christmas was around the corner and I didn't really even register it. Bill had already given me a vacation, but I still had no idea what to do with the free time. So I spent it all recording songs or working in the boxing gym. I was quite successful in pretending that there would be no holidays. Definitely not for me, because I obviously had no one to spend them with.I kind of thought she wanted to invite me to D

40

I was happy that dad was back home. Even though he looked so exhausted and tired of life. There was hope... that things would get better.When mom came home from work, we cooked dinner together and ate it at the dining room table. Dad talked about how he didn't like the diet food, but I was sure it was still more palatable than what he was getting at the hospital.Then we made cocoa, in which everyone got their share of marshmallows (that is, except for dad) and we sat in the living room on the couch until evening.During the crazy week that Bill spent in the hospital, Danni even managed to put up Christmas decorations. And that's only thanks to the fact that she probably didn't get much sleep either. But at that moment, when we turned on the lights on the Christmas tree and my parents started bringing up shameful stories from my childhood, everything seemed perfectly fine after a long time. We were laughing, dad was holding mom's shoulders and I was smiling.It was just an illusion.

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