1000 Jokes Novels & Stories

Only I could turn what was supposed to be a romantic, moving proposal into such a humiliating scene. And the worst part was that I'd already been through this 99 times. Isabelle and I had been together for seven years, from ages 23 to 30. I'd already proposed 99 times, and today was my hundredth. On every previous proposal, she'd refused me, saying that her childhood friend, Ronald Shaw, hadn't married yet, and she couldn't break their promise.

“With due respect, miss. For me as an investor, keep luring newcomers to get the older ones paid, this sounds like a textbook Ponzi scheme.” Miss Irwin stiffens as she hears the metaphor. “Oh, Thomas, this joke is too much.” Mom doesn’t know what happened. She is always the one who plays nice. So she smiles sorrily at Miss Irwin. My hand reaches under the table, firmly holding hers. Miss Irwin eyes me back, I gave her a “Never Mind. He is always like that” head shake. We don’t need to waste time on talking to people who is simply beyond save. It’s just not worth it.

"You have no idea–I was just joking around, but those disgusting guys went crazy asking me for your contact." The old me would have already been crying, asking her how she could do this to me, voice breaking. Not this me. My teeth clenched so hard they hurt. My whole body trembled with anger. I snatched the flyer out of her hand and slapped her across the face. Tara screamed, clutching her cheek in disbelief. "You hit me? I treat you like my best friend, and you can't even take a joke anymore?" Best friend? I let out a cold laugh.

The employee was on edge, but Seth cut him off with a sharp tone before he could finish. "What are you talking about? Over a hundred cancellations?" He stepped forward and grabbed the employee by the collar. "Is there some mistake? These customers paid deposits. Why would they all cancel at once?" Lily pushed her way in, fixing a hard gaze on the employee. "There's got to be a mistake. Check it again! "Is this some kind of sick joke? Someone pretending to be a customer just to mess with us?"

The room exploded with laughter. "Mark, let's bet—how long till she crawls back?" "I'm calling it now—Jenna's in your bed tonight, crying to make up!" "I'm in. Her mom sucks up three grand a day—without you, she couldn't even afford a cremation!" The escort flashed a ring in my face, all sugary sweet. "I'm broke, but I'll toss in fifty—she's not getting that divorce." I stared at the ring... then laughed.

she wailed uncontrollably, frantically clawing at Vanessa's clothes. Everyone in the room was stunned. "What are you doing?" Vanessa screamed as she struggled. "Let go, you insane woman! Investments always come with risk! How is it my fault if you lost money?" "Investments?" I scoffed coldly. I pulled out a thick stack of bank statements from my bag and slammed them onto the dining table. "You call these 'investments', Vanessa?" I glanced at the male colleagues who had been cracking vulgar jokes at the table earlier and said loudly, "Over the past six months, Vanessa has used Mr. Studdard's name to set up three investment group chats and scammed nearly six million dollars from everyone.