Absurd Funny Quotes

He was born with a mask. The mask was a result of curse that was placed on his mother when he was in the womb. Due to this mask, he has neva been granted free movement and this make him a wicked King. Nobody has seen the king except those that are living in the Palace but they all known that he is a masked king. Only "her" can lift the curse and soften his wicked heart. She is a human with crazy personalities. But something seems to be wrong when she was chosen as the Alpha mate. Who on earth will ever imagine alpha Jayden's mate will be a mere human being. Whereas, they were born on the same day, the same place and the same time but fate had it's way in their lives. This is the story of Alpha Jayden's crazy mate

Normal na buhay ang kinagisnan ni Joel o mas kilala bilang si Wella sa Barangay Maligaya—ang baklang harot subalit hindi basta mahahablot. Iisa lang kasi ang ang tininibok ng kaniyang imaginary merlat. Iyon ay walang iba kundi si Hans, ang ultimate hunk basketball player tuwing liga sa kanilang baranggay.Subalit hanggang tingin na lang talaga siya not until makilala niya si Beki-God mother na nagbigay sa kaniya ng kahilingang gawin siyang babae. Natupad naman iyon at nahumaling nga sa kagandahan niya si Hans. Sino ba naman siya para tumanggi? Nagpakilala siya sa binata bilang si Cindy at niligawan siya ng binata. Subalit hanggang kailan niya itatago ang katotohanan sa lalaking nagugustuhan?

A modern man from Earth, Caden, woke up and discovered he became a cat! Not only that, he had woken up to a world that can only be found in fantasy stories! What's even more incomprehensible is that he had found himself a mysterious owner! His owner likes to threaten him, likes to make him remember all the goodness he has done for him, likes to touch him here and there---! He is truly pitiful. ----- Evan: I have a cat. My cat likes to stick his tongue out to me, so I pulled it. My cat likes to cry and is very timid but he can kick ass. I love my cat.

Sext Buddy: [I’d do anything to fuck you right now.] Alicia: [I want you so bad too…really.] During the summer, Alicia has been sexting with a total stranger in hopes that she’d never meet him. At the beginning of college, her mum tells her that they have a guest. She meets the stranger she was constantly sexting. But then, what happens when the stranger is her cousin?

Zane is a werewolf and his planet was destroyed by vampires. His mother sent him to Earth, the planet of humans, just before their planet was destroyed. Zane was a young werewolf and he didn't know how to survive on his own, in a planet of humans, but then, he found an orphanage and his life changes

Cassandra Johnson is Pixie. Pixie is Cassandra Johnson. She's the same girl who's leading two extremely different lives. Nobody would suspect the school's nerd as Pixie. 'Cause Pixie's a street fighter badass and the nerd does not have a single badass bone in her body. The chances of people discovering this peculiar secret is close to none but of course this is where fate inserts the certified new boy into the equation and makes an exception for him. Warning: heavy flow of profanities ahead. - and tears - or so I've heard.

Sa gitna ng masalimuot na buhay sa Maynila, si Heart Cruz, isang dedicated nurse, ay nagkakaroon ng muling pagkikita kasama ang kanyang mga kaibigan mula pagkabata, sina Althea, Angie, at Janith. Isang araw, habang abala sa kanyang duty sa isang pribadong hospital, nakatagpo siya ng hindi inaasahang insidente kay Brandon Flores, isang mayamang businessman at may-ari ng hotel at beach resort at isang Multi-Billionare. Ang isang simpleng banggaan ay nagresulta sa isang hindi kanais-nais na pagkakahawakan na nagpasiklab ng galit ni Heart. Habang ang kanyang kaibigan na si Janith ay nalalapit na sa panganganak, nagiging masalimuot ang sitwasyon nang magtagpo muli ang kanilang mga landas. Sa gitna ng emosyon at tensyon, kailangang harapin ni Heart ang kanyang galit at ang mga hindi inaasahang damdamin kay Brandon, na tila may mas malalim na ugat sa kanyang galit at ang kanyang asal na para dito. Ano kaya mangyari sa dalawa habang tinatahak ang hamon ng kanilang nakaraan at kasalukuyan? May pag-ibig ba kayang mabubuo sa kanilang alitan. Ano kayang kwentong sa pagkakaibigan? May pag-ibig pa kayang bumuo sa kanilang wasak na puso? At pagtuklas sa tunay na pagkatao sa kabila ng mga pagsubok at hamon sa buhay? "PAHIRAM NG ISANG GABI (BOOK #1)

Claire thought her life couldn’t get any worse when her boyfriend broke her heart, but a night out with her best friends turned her world upside down. A spiked drink, an unforgettable one-night stand, and an awkward morning-after encounter lead her straight into the arms of Mackenzie Allister—a powerful CEO and the man who now claims she’s destined to be his wife. Mack’s offer seems absurd, but his charm, persistence, and a shocking family rivalry involving her ex-boyfriend, Liam, pull Claire into a whirlwind of passion, deceit, and schemes. Forced into a marriage of convenience, Claire navigates the complications of corporate power plays, bitter betrayals from her closest friends, and a family determined to tear her apart from Mack. As enemies close in, Claire must decide who she can trust and whether she’s willing to risk her heart for a man whose motives may not be entirely pure. Will she succumb to the chaos of revenge and ambition, or can love and loyalty triumph against all odds?

Man dies. His last act in the previous life generates him an absurd amount of karma. He meets a god, and it reborns him in a crossworld of Larry Potter and DxD. He gets a gift, one that can only be fully explored with the knowledge that he learned in his previous profession in the previous world. The keeping of knowledge is also a gift. And with that, his karma is spent. Thrown in the world with a 'good luck' and a slap in the back, he fights to survive until the start of canons. The time until that, 1000 years. Yeah… Now read about some of his adventures in this crossed over world, beginning already in HP canon. English is not my main language, so you will find some strange stuff, like the mix of North American and the Queen’s English. Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize from the franchise of Larry Potter and DxD are propriety of its respective creators and I only wish that they were mine. But they are not. I only own the MC, the OCs, and the ideas that generated the non canon plot.

HYPNOTIC POISON Synopsis: Siya si Monina, ang babaeng naligaw sa teritoryo ng mga delikadong tao. Sa isang pribadong bar na pagmamay-ari ni Frelan Dela Sierro, isang makapangyarihang mafia. Mayaman, ma-awtoridad, pumapaslang ng mga taong sumasalungat sa pananaw nito at walang ibang nasusunod kundi ang sarili lamang. Nag-bago lamang iyon nang hayaan niya ang isang babae na mag-lasing sa kanyang bar. Para bang may malalim itong problema dahil hindi man lang ito nakaramdam ng panganib. Nilapitan niya ito hindi upang magpa-kilala kundi takutin nang bigla siya nitong kabigin at mariing hinalikan sa labi. Naramdaman ni Frelan na naalarma ang kanyang mga tauhan ngunit senenyasan niya ang mga itong 'wag makialam. Nais sanang palalimin ni Frelan ang halik dahil nadadala siya sa malambot na labi nito nang bigla itong nawalan ng malay sa kanyang mga bisig. It was just a one night that started with a kiss but here he is getting addicted to her soft lips. When their lips crashed into one, he knew he tasted a hypnotic poison. And because of that, he planned to hide his true identity that he's a dangerous mafia king just to be with her. But can Monina accept Frelan's real identity? Will the both of them stay together and conquer love against all challenges? Well, there's one way to find out…