Because This Is My First Life Novels & Stories

"Because you’re the first thing in my life that ever felt real." The words came slowly, deliberately. Like he was admitting something he had never told anyone before. "Everything elsethe business, the money, the games, the womennone of it ever felt like it actually meant anything." His eyes locked onto mine, dark and completely unguarded for the first time since I met him. "But then you walked in. And for the first time in my entire life, I wanted something that wasn’t just about winning." I swallowed, my chest tightening painfully.

In my first life, I had died believing love was a trap. In this one, I realized it was a choice. “Yes,” I whispered. Then louder, steadier, “Yes.” He pulled me into his arms, holding me like he was afraid the world might still try to steal me away. For the first time since my rebirth, I wasn’t looking over my shoulder. Yet somewhere deep in my chest a faint unease stirred. Because I knew better than anyone else. A second life didn’t mean the universe was done collecting its debts. As the sun fully rose over the city, my phone vibrated on the counter behind us.

-I don't believe you. -It's the truth. I wouldn't know how to prove it to you, if I had the chance to let you into my head and into my heart you would realize how special you are to me. You're the first one in my life, at least the first one I feel all this with. Do you think I'd be asking you to live together if I didn't?

I woke in bed to see the day had broken. It was finally Monday, and a part of me wished this day wouldn’t come because I knew what it meant. Monday meant returning to our normal lives. This life, although brief, felt more real than anything I’ve ever experienced in all my twenty-one years of existence. It made sense why I didn’t want to let it go.

"I really can't tell why things happen." I couldn't agree more. The first time I met Laurent I was dying. That time, I was just a normal human, trying so hard to live and get by.

Genesis My breath hitched in my chest as I stared at the strangers around me. What did that even mean? Life itself? I was nothing. Why would I be taught humility and self-hate my whole life only to be told by the very ones I was supposed to fear that I was life itself?

The page loaded. For the first time since leaving, I wasn't thinking about where I had come from. I was thinking about what I could build from here. I opened a blank document beside the new account and typed two lines. New life. New rules. Then I began working.

He looked exactly as he did now. But he was smiling. I walked closer. What is this? Your first life. I watched myself hold a newborn baby. My daughter. I began crying. She was beautiful. Cassian placed his hand on my shoulder. We did it. I smiled. No. We began it. The memory shifted. The sky became dark. The Ancestors descended. The First King appeared. The Creator appeared. Everyone wanted the child. I watched myself make a decision. I gave the baby to the First Life.

Alexa I never thought my life turned out like this. Never in my life want something like this to happen. I bet no one ever wants to. All my life, I only want happiness and a happy ending which later, I can tell my grandchild that my life is like a fairytale. I guess that will never happen then. You guys might be wondering why I said this. let me tell you.

And for the first time in my life — I didn’t know what to do next. Because whichever path I chose — I might not survive it.