Beyond the Rub (Tales of a masseuse)
I became a prisoner in my own life.
The final straw came when Ryan’s anger turned violent. He would hit me at every slightest chance he got. I was not allowed to mingle or keep friends. My friends literally stayed away from me.
Funny thing was, the more he messed with me, the more my love for him grew stronger. He knew I couldn’t leave him, and he used that against me.
After constant battles, I escaped, shattered and vulnerable.
Since then, I have built walls around myself, safeguarding my emotions. Intimacy became transactional to me, not a connection. I sought pleasure, not commitment or attachment.
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