Dirty Stories Funny Novels & Stories

He shifted on his stool conspiratorially and whispered, “Me too, and know what we need to do to ease the stress.” Mario had a sly grin, and I had a feeling I knew where this was going, but I asked anyway, “What is it?” “We should fuck it out.” His voice had lost its wit. It’s turned sultry. Five minutes ago, I was a girl who moved to this town to live a quiet life, obsessed with starting over, and one look at this guy made me want to throw it all away. I didn’t like him and thought he was pompous a few seconds ago.

Dustin grumbled. "What? You're kidding me," Aiden laughed as he placed the dry dishes in the cupboard. "She's good for you, man. I enjoy seeing you so uncoordinated and happy. You are happy, aren't you?" "Yes, I am," Dustin smiled. "I'm the happiest I've ever been. Plus, that thing Taryn does with her back and tongue, it amazes me every time." "Alright, TMI, Dusty," Aiden gagged. "Where are the ladies?" Aiden wondered.

Nathan answers for me, still grinning like a damn fool. She stares at me like he just told her I used to be royalty. “Yes, okay,” I say, trying not to cringe. “I used to strip. There were two clubs I worked for, then I started doing private calls. Paid well. That’s all.” The second I finish speaking, she bursts into laughter. Full-blown, hand-over-mouth, shoulders-shaking laughter. She tries to contain it but fails miserably. “Finished?” I ask dryly, watching her try to catch her breath.

In the end, readers are crazy for being readers in a world where words flow down the monosyllabic drain of unculturedness. * This is a chronicle that I love, from the time when Bia was still married and she would gossip to me over the phone. Added a dash of comedy. I burst out laughing every time I read it! almost divorce "Your fart is so stinky!" ― And by any chance, is there a smelly fart? “There are the not-so-overly-stinky ones. You look like you died inside, you're rotten! Go to the bathroom or I'm going to pass out.

There was one thing to be caught in the middle of testosterone knock-off, it was other to be the reason of it. “We have nine lives, imagine my ghost haunting you. Creeping into the shower when you are naked. Or worse, having sex. Do people here know you once slipped in the shower and took down a lady friend of yours? Oo. Ms.Shelly was not happy.” Boisterous laughter shook the table. Surprisingly, Mikhail laughed too. Everyone did, except Noah. “How did we go from cherry blossoms to this? There is a kid at the table, Rhys.” Noah was displeased so everyone had to pretend it wasn’t funny. How God-like.Vanessa was wise to keep the derision to herself.

“Who the hell cares? Don’t you see how much money it pays?” “Yeah I do. But don’t you think it sounds kinda weird? Cleaning maid wanted where? In the freaking attic? For a porn filming production? Or maybe even better; for a freaking weirdo who likes to watch women cleaning his house naked?” Her friend let out a hearthy laugh at the sound of that, the thought of his shy and all-too-innocent for this world friend prancing around butt-naked and with one of those rainbow-colored dust sticks making him double over with laughter. “Yeah well, say what you want but you’d be definitely killing it with that,” He commented, waving a finger to the length of her body.

The room erupted in laughter and shouts as Joyce let out a muffled squeal that quickly turned into a laugh. When they finally pulled apart, Joyce’s face was flushed pink. “You’re insane!” Sandra grinned. “And you liked it.” Amara whistled. “Well, this party just got interesting.” The game went on… wild, messy, and full of laughter. Amara dared Joyce to flash her bra through the window. Sandra made me take a shot off her neck… which ended in both of us giggling uncontrollably and almost spilling the drink. And when it was Amara’s turn, Joyce dared her to sit on Sandra’s lap and whisper something dirty in her ear.

“That’s nothing! Did you see the politician who wore mismatched shoes to the press conference? Black left, brown right. And he stood there confidently for an hour. I was embarrassed for his ancestors.” Jane pushed up her glasses, giggling. “It was trending number one for a whole day. People were making memes faster than I could keep up.” Amara found herself smiling, the heaviness of her morning already dissolving. These women were a storm—loud, witty, endlessly amused by the absurdities of the world. Their words tumbled out like waterfalls, bouncing from one scandal to another, from celebrity breakups to viral dances, always in that infectious rhythm of hot gist.

' Cassian soon returned with a bag in hand. Uea stared at the bag as his eyes slowly regained their enthusiasm. He bit his lower lip, trying his best to suppress his excitement. But his heart was racing fast. This was what he'd been waiting for. The kinks of the old Mafia lord. The kinks that turned his readers against him. Uea couldn't wait to enjoy them all! Cassian opened the bag, revealing different kinds of sex toys. Their sizes vary, and there were even some with sharp ends.

Joe’s eyes bulged, his brows furrowing in pure rage, but his hands moved against his will, rubbing moose excrement into his own face. “You know what Gigi told me?” I said conversationally, turning to Nikolai. “She saw on TikTok that some men don’t wash their asses.” I tutted at Joe. “We can’t have that. Rub your ass in that shit, bro. Get it between the cheeks.” Joe looked like he was about to slaughter us, but he was powerless as he rolled his ass in the dung, grinding into it like he had the world’s itchiest bottom. At this point, Nikolai and I were crying with laughter, struggling to breathe as we doubled over, barely able to steal glances at each other without completely losing it again.