Drunk Funnies Novels & Stories

Edward and I held our engagement party in Las Vegas. Everything seemed perfect—until someone suggested a game of Truth or Dare. One of Edward's female coworkers looked me straight in the eye. "I am pregnant. It is your fiancé's baby." Laughter burst out around us. Everyone thought it was a joke—except Edward. After the trip, we returned home. He looked uneasy. "I'm the father of Juliet's baby," he admitted. "Don't overthink it. We were on a business trip and got too drunk with a client. We accidentally spent the night together. "She is from a British aristocratic family. Reputation matters a lot to her. She will never marry me. She only wants to have the baby and raise it alone." "So what are you saying?" I asked. "I am the father. I have to take responsibility. I will stay in the apartment I rented for her and take care of her pregnancy on weekdays, and come home on weekends. "Our wedding will be delayed. We will get married after the baby is borned." I gave a small smile. So he had it all planned out. He was just here to inform me. He let out a sigh of relief, picked up his Rimowa suitcase, and walked out without looking back. I wiped the tears off my face and began packing away all the memories of our relationship. Suddenly, my phone buzzed. The voice on the other end sounded messy and emotional. "Margot, I freaking love you. Don't marry him. Marry me instead." I froze for a second, then replied, "Okay."

We stepped out of his car after we spotted a basket in front of the gate. As we approached, I heard a sound. I walked closer and gasped. “What’s that thing?” he asked. “This isn’t a ‘thing.’ It’s a baby,” I deadpanned. I picked up the child. A baby girl. My eyes widened. she had every feature of my boss. Almost like they were related. A note hung from her necklace. “How the hell did she get here?” he asked, coming closer. I shrugged. Slowly, I opened the note and read it aloud: Dear Nick, You probably don’t remember me. We met at a party almost two years ago. We had a one-night stand. Too drunk to use protection. Luciana is the result of that reckless night. I’ve cared for her for a year, putting my life on hold. Now it’s your turn. I don’t want anything from you. Just take care of your child. Xoxo. I watched him run a finger through his hair. Even stressed, the gesture was hypnotic. He’s that beautiful. I couldn’t deny it. “What the fuck? Set up an appointment with my doctor immediately. I’m going to conduct a DNA test for this…thing.” I snorted internally. “Her name is Luciana,” I replied, and he rolled his eyes. I stared down at the baby. She didn’t deserve any of this. How could a mother leave her own child? And what if someone had taken her before we arrived? Luciana. At least she had a name.

He steps closer to me... Closer... More closer... He pulls me close to him. His hand wrapped around my wrist. His eyes are into my lips. His hand grips my chin and his finger touches on my lower lips. I swallow my saliva... He slowly leans towards me. Our lips are an inch far. I closed my eyes... Against my ear, he whispered, "You are my women"... He steps closer to me... Closer... More closer... He pulls me close to him. His hand wrapped around my wrist. His eyes are into my lips. His hand grips my chin and his finger touches on my lower lips. I swallow my saliva... He slowly leans towards me. Our lips are an inch far. I closed my eyes... Against my ear, he whispered, "You are my women"... My temper sparked. I evert my eyes in his."In your dream", I shout and forcefully pushed him away... I run out of the room. My heart was pounding wildly in my ear. I took a deep breath, claim the rapid thuds in my chest. I desperately want to claim my heartbeat down... In reality, I am confused why my heart was pounding when he was close to me? Why did I close my eyes? Why I am blushing? I just hate him, isn't I? I asked myself why he said that to me? Is he drunk? I pulled my hair, Questions in my heart driving me crazy...

On our wedding night, my husband Grayson's sister-in-law, Scarlette, stumbled drunkenly into our bridal suite and threw her arms around him, refusing to let go. "Kayla, my husband died young, and I really just want a child. Please, lend him to me for one night," she cried through her tears, shoving a toy into my hand. "I promise I'll return him tomorrow. And if you get lonely… you can use this to comfort yourself." I stood there, dumbfounded, my gaze shifting in confusion to Grayson, who was already helping Scarlette steady herself. "You're really going to sleep with her?" He avoided my eyes, his tone strangely urgent. "Don't overthink it. She's drunk and talking nonsense. I'll take her back to her room to rest." As he started to leave with her, I stepped in front of them, blocking their way. "Grayson, it's our wedding night tonight. Are you seriously going to walk out with her?" His expression darkened as he pushed me aside. "You're my wife now—try to be more sensible. Don't get jealous over something so trivial." Then, carefully, he guided her out of the room. I wanted to run after him and stop them, but when I saw the deep concern in his eyes as he looked at her, the truth finally hit me. The love this man had for me was no longer mine alone. And if that was the case, why should I cling to a marriage that had already soured? I might as well walk away with my head held high.

“I-I was in the shower then I got horny while thinking of you and started fingering myself until I came,” I said.  “I think I have become a nymphomaniac because of you, Donovan.” “Do you know what that is?” He chuckled, to which I nodded eagerly. “You are cute. Well, if you must know, buttercup,” He began, stroking my cheek. “I wasn't entirely pulling your legs that day. I want to fuck you, Emily. Ever since I got those pictures, I haven't stopped picturing you taking my cock in various positions.” “Really?” I croaked, arousal evident in my voice as I splayed my hands on his chest. + On their third anniversary, Emily Wright’s boyfriend coldly ends things between them. Heartbroken, she goes home, gets drunk, and takes lewd pictures of herself to feel better. By accident, she sends the pictures to the CEO of her company, Donovan Coleman. On discovering her mistake, she’s appalled but decides to put on a brave face. However, she’s further horrified to discover that Donovan is her ex’s brother, who unknown to her, was intrigued by her at first sight. An heated encounter with Donovan stirs up illicit desire within Emily that both confuses and excites her. A week later at a charity gala, they end up spending the night together. Throwing caution to the wind, Emily continues fooling around with Donovan. What happens when she falls in love with him? Will she end things before they spiral out of control, or will she choose pleasure over letting go?

WARNING ⚠️: 90% EXPLICIT AND MATURE CONTENT AHEAD 🔞🔞🔞 |Do you dare to read a forbidden love and obsession story between a teacher and her student? Then you're in the right place… 😏| |It starts sweet until it gets filthy and hot all around! 🥵🫦| *** Mrs. Lyla Atelo had just gotten her acceptance letter as a teacher for the most prestigious high school in the country. Her excitement knows no bounds as she rushes to her best friend's house to break the news. To her shock, the door is opened by her half-naked husband, whom she hasn't seen for six years. She feels betrayed as she reads the room and flees in tears. A drunk night in the club, and she lets herself go for the first time in her life. The night gets more heated until she is bent over the hood of her car and f**ked to orgasm (something she didn't know could happen to her). When she returns home, her husband is waiting with proof that he never cheated on her, and Lyla is heavily crushed by her betrayal to her husband. Not only that, to her horror, the man who bent her over is none other than her student… and he asserts that he wants her. Sage Dominic is a nineteen-year-old senior in his finals, dangerously handsome and almost always detached from his immediate surroundings, without a care in the world for his studies until he meets Mrs. Lyla Atelo. He is drawn to her innocence, not caring that she is married. He wants her, and he always gets whatever he wants. Her resistance fuels his desires and obsession, and he knows it is only a matter of time before she will be entirely submissive to him.

When I opened my eyes once more, Flora was holding me tightly. I had secretly loved her for a decade. Her warm lips kissed my neck, telling me not to leave. This time, I pushed her away and told the butler to send her to her first love's home. Her first love was Sean Graham. In my last life, Flora drank so much that she was drunk during the celebration organized for me to celebrate me for getting an overseas college's offer letter. After the celebration, I didn't refuse her when she wanted me to stay, and that wild night came to pass. The next morning, when Sean saw me coming out of Flora's bedroom, he pretended to be amiable and said he would make our wish come true despite the darkness in his eyes. Then, he disappeared for about one month. In the end, we found a blood-stained necktie in the mountains and the skeletal remains that had been feasted on by wild animals. Flora didn't sleep for an entire night as she held Sean's necktie in her hand. After that, it was like the discovery hadn't affected her at all, as she still passionately planned for my birthday trip. But that very night during the trip, I was abducted. I begged the kidnappers to beg Flora to pay the ransom, but I heard her personally give the orders. "Don't let him die too easily. He's just some scum of the earth. Do whatever you want with him. When you're done, dump him in the Northern Barrens and clean things up. He owes Sean this much!" Flora, I'm done playing by your rules this time around.

I loved Alpha Lucien Grey with all my heart. From the moment I first saw him, I was drawn to him. However, I always knew the one Lucien loved was someone else. Her name was Summer White. I thought I’d be like one of those tragic side characters in romance stories—forever on the sidelines, watching the man I loved build a life with another woman. However, everything changed three years ago when Summer ran away on the night of the marking ceremony, saying she wasn’t ready to be claimed. Lucien had to make a decision and announced he would find a new partner. So, I stepped forward. Wearing a dress that didn’t quite fit, my hands trembling, I stood in for Summer. That day, Lucien and I formed a bond as mates. For the past three years, Lucien had treated me with warmth and kindness. He was gentle and thoughtful. He took care of me in every way. However, just over a month ago, Summer came back to our pack. On the night of our anniversary, she got drunk and called Lucien in tears, sobbing that she regretted everything. Lucien’s hands were shaking so hard he almost dropped his phone, but he didn’t hang up. He just stood there, torn. When his eyes met mine, full of confusion and pain, I took his hand—still trembling—and said softly, “Go to her.” The moment he left, I filed the mate-bond termination papers at City Hall, requesting to break the bond. After all, these years of stolen happiness were never really mine to keep. It was time for me to leave, too.

I let out soft moans of pleasure... Leaning on the wall, I grappled one leg on his waist, with one of my hands holding the table tightly, and the other wrapped around his neck. He unzipped my dress and helped me pull it off, while I fumbled through to unbutton his shirt, not taking my lips away from his. We moved further to the couch, kissing like it would be our very last. My breast brushed against his chest, creating a warm feeling, and this overwhelming sensation made my breath heavier. He latched his tongue on my neck, and a moan escaped my lips. "Chris.." I called, under my breath. Biting my already swollen lips, sinking my hands into his back, trying to pull him closer to me. His left arm remained rooted in my neck, while the other arm glided down my waist, to my ass and I whimpered, arching my body towards his, this felt so good. "You taste so good" he whispered, gently biting my ear lobes, my body reacted as his breath touched me. When demons meet and are entangled in the web of forbidden love, hate and sacrifices - chaos is bound to happen. Just when life becomes rough for JJ... Joanna, she gets drunk in a party and goes wild with a one night stand, the almighty Chris Aetos, a billionaire CEO and prince of the ginns. Therefore a fate may have it... THE PREY OF THE GINN NEVER ESCAPES THE GINN. Gradually, both get caught up in a whirlwind of shocking discoveries, histories and dark revelations. What is it like to discover that you were once in love with a particular person eight hundred years ago?

At the New Year’s team-building event, the intern, Lilith Woods, did not obtain my approval and changed our suburban trip to a seven-day tour of Baline. “Mr. Lucian Stone, I hear a change of scenery can really spice things up. Don’t lock up tonight. I’ll come by for a deep dive into our collaboration.” She pretended to be drunk and fell into my arms while slipping the room key into my pocket in the process. To avoid suspicion, I did not return to the hotel. However, in the middle of the night, the police called me in for questioning—someone had reported a dine-and-dash. Only then did I realize that the reserved budget of $100,000 for the accommodation had long since been exceeded. Lilith had upgraded their room to a presidential suite, feasted on high-end seafood buffets, and even used company funds to buy luxury handbags! When I showed up at their private room, the interns were still casually taking king crabs and several unopened bottles of the Macallan Whisky with them. “Mr. Stone, you’re just in time. Could you please settle the bill?” Lilith looked utterly righteous as she said this with a grin. “Young people like us make mistakes, while adults help to pay the price. You’re not exactly short on cash, anyway. Just think of it as buying my happiness.” I stared at the $700,000 bill and paid it in silence. The next day, the payment invoices made their grand entrance in the group chat, accompanied by my pinned message. [Upon financial review, this team-building event does not meet reimbursement criteria. All expenses will be shared equally among the seven participants.] [Each person will need to pay $100,000, payable immediately. If payment needs to be deferred, please print the proof and submit it to the President’s Office.]