Filipino Logic Joke

"What... What are these?" Selene stammered, her voice barely more than a whisper. "Divorce papers?" She looked up at Maximus, searching his face for some sign of a joke, a mistake - anything to tell her this wasn’t real. His eyes flickered with a brief moment of hesitation before hardening into a steely gaze. "If Jess hadn’t disappeared, we never would have gotten married” he drawled before delivering the final blow. “Well, Jess is back now.” She couldn’t breathe. Despite her best efforts over their three years of marriage, Maximus had never acknowledged her nor loved her the way he loved Jess. **** She signed the papers, and left his life for good, taking the babies growing in her womb with her. A few years later, She became a top medical doctor and did everything possible to stay away from Maximus. However, on her twins’ fifth birthday, they came running to her, giggling: "Mummy, we found our billionaire daddy!" She looked up and saw Maximus standing in front of her, clearly expecting her to run into his arms. Instead, She chuckled. His eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets when she responded with a deadpan expression, "No, babies, your Father is dead."

I return to my hometown after becoming the wealthiest person in the world. I stand beside a luxury car I bought for my father and call him—I want him to be surprised when he picks me up. However, this backfires on me. I joke with him and tell him my company has gone bankrupt. My debtors are coming after me, so I'm home to flee from them. I end up standing under the sweltering sun until the sky goes dark and it starts to pour—my father never shows up to see his gift. I brave the rain as I head home. Before I even enter the house, I can sense my sister-in-law's panic. "Listen to me—don't tell that jinx that Dad has just won a million dollars!" My mother says, "I knew having a daughter was a bad decision. It's bad enough that she doesn't have money for us—why is she coming home when she's in trouble? She should just die out there!" My father sneers. "Well, we can sell her off to that cripple in the village. Maybe she'll fetch a good price!"

When the college admission notice arrived, I suddenly developed a high fever and was bedridden. My sister encountered a kidnapping on her way to help me collect the notice, and her life was uncertain. My parents hated me deeply. After tearing up my admission notice, they forced me to give up my studies and work in a factory. Later, I experienced a kidnapping as well. After narrowly escaping, I hid in an abandoned factory and sent them a message for help. My dad called me and shouted at me without restraint, “Lena, are you even human? How could you play such a joke on us on Jessica's memorial day!” “Do you have any idea how much your mom and I wished it had been you who died back then?” In my last moments before death, their insults echoed in my ears. I was tortured and killed, turned into a monster, and my body was thrown into a stinking ditch for three full days. Even my father, the most experienced forensic expert, couldn’t recognize me. When my sister returned home with the guy she eloped with years ago, my dad had just restored my appearance through technology. They knelt before my decaying corpse and cried until they fainted.

After the tragic death of my best friend, I took her younger brother in and treated him like my own. Everyone knew how much Zach Lawson meant to me, so much so that I vowed not to marry because I could not bear leaving him. The day he turned eighteen, he got on one knee and asked me to marry him. With tears of joy streaming down my face, I took the bouquet from him, only to realize they were made of writhing snakes. Everyone laughed at my misfortune. It was an artfully crafted joke, at my expense. Thalia Lewis laced her arm through Zach's and grinned. "Sorry about that, Sydney. It was just an innocent prank. Zach is willing to do anything to make me smile!" Zach gave me a look of utter disgust. "Is this what you think of me? You're my sister! How can you even think of marrying me? This is vile! Is this the reason you took me in? Have you been secretly pining for me since the start?" My whole life had come crashing down around me. I was overcome with shock, misery, and despair, until Connor Grey showed up and asked for my hand in marriage.

At our college graduation, my fiance suddenly proposed to Lillie Stewart, my best friend, in front of everyone. I became a joke in front of everyone. Right after Lillie accepted my fiance’s proposal, Lloyd Becker, heir to the biggest mafia family on the West Coast, publicly said he loved me. Lloyd was known in the mafia world for being serious and never getting involved with women. So, when he showed an interest in an orphan like me, it made the news. We got married, and for five years, he was so sweet and treated me like a princess. But one day, I accidentally overheard him talking to his friend. “Lillie is already set to become the future lady of the Gacira family. Are you really going to keep the act up with Nelly?” “If I can’t have Lillie, it doesn’t matter who I marry. As long as I’m with Nelly, Lillie can live peacefully.” He even gave Lillie the symbol of the Becker family’s lady. He helped Lillie build her career while letting me fade into the background. After five years of marriage, I finally understood. On our fifth anniversary, I pretended to die in a shooting so he could be with the woman he truly loved. But instead of being happy, Lloyd completely broke down.

Katherine Dalton was once the pride of the Blackwood Pack. As the Beta’s daughter, she thought she had everything, a happy family and a bright future—to be Alpha Harrison’s Luna. She loved Harrison deeply for five years. But fate had other plans. Her best friend was claimed by Alpha Harrison as his fated mate, only to die shortly after, and Katherine became the prime suspect. Faced with the Beta rank and her brother’s future, her parents abandoned her. Alpha Harrsion threw her into prison, despite her countless repeated that she never killed Elisa. In prison, she endured endless torment and lost her connection with her wolf. She never thought she would be freed again by a stranger. But Harrison hasn’t done with her. He forbade any pack from taking her in, unless she became a slave or a whore. Katherine vowed she would never forgive him. Until the Moon Goddess played a cruel joke, binding them together as second chance mates. As the secrets behind the murder begin to unravel, Harrison regrets and refuses to let her go again. But is it already too late? And Harrison’s rebellious half-brother turned to be the very man who freed Katherine from the jail. Now we have a broken woman, two unwilling Alphas, and two mate bonds.

One year ago, my life was picture perfect. I have a loving family and a boyfriend who adore me, Elias. He is wolfless but his Alpha father think him capable of leading the pack, and I was to become his Luna. Jasper, Elias’s younger brother took advantage of his good-natured wolfless brother and forced him out when the old Alpha died suddenly. When I saw the blood on Jasper’s hands, I knew I would never see Elias again. Then I find out this evil usurper is my mate. Jasper’s unstable temper and lust became a constant in my life. My body craves him, the bond between us was undeniable, a cruel joke played by the moon goddess. Then one day, with his cold voice he told me he is going to reject me, and he did. At the coronation ceremony of his new Luna, I discover that my second chance mate is actually the mysterious Lycan King. What’s even more shocking is that except for the color of his eyes, this Lycan King looks exactly like my dead Elias. Who is he? Will he be my salvation or another nightmare? If he is Elias, how can I face him?

Before my wedding, my vision which I lost after saving Bruce unexpectedly returned. Overjoyed, I hurried to share the wonderful news with him, but as I stepped into the living room, I froze. Bruce and my cousin, Kerry, were in a passionate embrace. "Bruce, the baby is perfectly healthy now. The doctor said we can sleep together again! Why don't we do it right here in the living room? Also, isn't it thrilling to do it here while Nancy is asleep in her room?" "Shut up! Don't joke about my wife like that!" Bruce snapped at her, but his reprimand was accompanied by a kiss. I stood there, watching in shock as their movements grew more intense and their breathing became heavier. Only then did I piece it all together. Their sudden shared enthusiasm for indoor workouts six months ago wasn't about fitness at all. Covering my mouth to stifle a sob, I turned back to my room and shut the door. I decided then and there: Bruce didn't need to know I had recovered. Reaching for my phone, I dialed my mother. "Mom, I'm not marrying Bruce anymore. I'll marry the comatose heir of the Blakes instead. I don't need Bruce in my life."

(Completed) It was supposed to be a normal visit to her Grandmother for the weekend ... Mia was supposed to spend a couple days in peace and quite with her granny until her best friend decided to tag along... The visit was going well and everything was set up right when suddenly it all turned into a nightmare.. A nightmare that she and Kevin would never forget for as long as they both lived... All it took was ONE JOKE ... ONE PRANK .... And their lives and fates were tangled together turing everything upside down beyond their imagination and limits, exposing their true selves along the way... ****Out of sudden Kevin came to my side and lifted me up on his shoulders with my head back and ran towards the attic in one swift move. I was shocked that I couldn't say or respond. His actions froze my mind instantly. I never thought he would do that. Then he put me down right in front of the attic door and pushes it open with his hands. CRREEEEEAAAAAAAAKKK The sound of the door opening gave me an instant shiver, my breathing stopped and I almost fainted. It felt like he was opening the door to my grave while i was still alive and threw me inside. I held onto Kevin's arms for support and he dragged me into the dark room as he stepped in ****

Lailah wanted to laugh at her own fate for playing such a sick joke on her. At 10 her parents divorced and none wanted to take her so she stayed with her aunt. At 15 she got into an accident that almost took her life and her leg was paralyzed for a year and now at 20 she was kidnapped by a Mafia because she saw something she wasn't suppose to see. Two brothers fighting and ruining her and not once have they thought what she wanted. " You don't love him" he grumbled while glaring with so much anger in his eyes I never saw before as tears continued to fall down my cheeks. " I didn't want to" I replied meekly helpless at my own heart as my lips wobbled while I clenched on his shirt not wanting to breakdown infront of him. " I won't let him have you" his words held promise as determination shone in his dark orbs and he crashed his lips on mine as I struggle to push him but my strength was nothing compared to his. Lailah Marques, a 20 years florist trying to find happiness in everything she does until her simple life was disrupted by a huge disasters .