Food Jokes

My mother-in-law is extremely frugal. She reuses paper others have discarded, carefully saving the unmarked portions. She even takes the black waste oil from the kitchen range hood and uses it to cook our meals. She says, "Frugality is a virtue—it brings blessings!" I try tirelessly to convince her otherwise, throwing out all her filthy items to protect my family's health. But while she praises me to my face, behind my back, she uses my baby's food scissors to clip her grimy toenails. My child eventually dies of a lung infection, leaving me heartbroken. My mother-in-law, however, points her finger at me, saying I'm unlucky and that I've brought misfortune to their family. Even my husband blames me. In the end, they use a knitting needle to pierce my throat and stab me to death. When I open my eyes again, I find myself back on the day I first see her picking up dirty paper. The first thing I do is hide all the high-quality tissue paper I had stocked up on before my pregnancy, pretending I knew nothing. She calls these blessings, right? Fine. The blessings of this miserly frugality—she can reap them all herself!

During the mass terrorist attack in Manila, every legal-aged citizen is required to work for the government in order to reclaim the living land by battling as an option. The country where the terrorists originated is still in the unknown and under further investigation. Meanwhile, juveniles who were separated from their families had no choice but to live by themselves — whereas building a town, planting food crops, hunting animals and even manslaughter is even a necessity by means of survival. Keisha and his brother, Jaden, are left alone to be chased by vicious brutes hiding from the shadows. Until then they found hope wherein they can rule over and claim justice in the ongoing catastrophe. Is this going to be their chance to be the unsung heroes?

“No, no, no!” She cried out, bending over to savage the little she could, but every attempt seemed fruitless because the food kept soaking into the wet ground. Unfortunately, it had rained that morning. This made her furious. With frantic wide eyes and a rage-fueled strength, she grabbed the nearest huge stone she could carry and ran like a wild beast, screaming at the top of her lungs after the car that had deprived her siblings’ food.

On my fifth birthday with Zachary Murdock, I sit once again in front of a full table of cold food, just like every year before. Zachary had promised, as always, to spend the day with me. And, as always, he breaks that promise. This year, it's because his childhood sweetheart wanted to shoot a set of "artistic photos". She invited him and a few of his close buddies to be part of it. Without hesitation, he ditches me again and runs straight into her arms. At 11:00 pm, his childhood sweetheart posts a photo to her social media and sets it so that only I can see it. In the picture, four men are in nothing but black briefs and Windsor-knotted ties. They kneel around her while she is draped in sheer fabric like a goddess. The caption reads, "Some people beg for crumbs, but I own the entire bakery." I take a screenshot. Then, I send it to the girlfriends of all three of Zachary’s best buddies. If they all look down on me this much, let's hope they don't end up on their knees begging me someday.

Ali thought she would finally get her revenge against her father and those who offended her in the past, while also digging back on her mother's supposed 'suicide' death. And all this by marrying into the Laverock family. However, she is unaware that, even though she sought revenge, she was an instrument of revenge and a lone prey in the Laverock family. She has a secret that Harriet wanted, one that could topple the country... Ali is a worker at Laverock Mega Food Chains and a competent marketing manager. But she is struggling to cater for her sick brother. Her father and stepmother are hellbent on marrying her off to regain their wealth and status, even going as far as using her brother's illness to threaten her. However, in her desperate moments, the matriarch of the Laverock family extends an olive branch to her after she saved the old woman from an accident. In exchange for sponsoring her brother's treatment, she is asked to marry the second young master of the family. But Martin elopes on the wedding day. Under the pressure of Harriet, Gerald steps in and marries Ali, but will it be an easy marriage? Their lives take a turn when Ali discovers a truth that shatters her. She is forced to leave and return six years later for revenge. Her heart is made up, and it was payback for the biggest scumbag of her life. VOLUME 1: Fortune or Luck. VOLUME 2: Love and Scheme; Who Beats the Game? VOLUME 3: Victory and Defeat; Who is fighting a losing battle? Get ready for a spin...

Love comes together starting from passion and love for food, Katherine Manson has a strong dream, a desire to escape from her father's too big shadow. The chance meeting between Katherine and Freddy Howling - Communications Director of Howling Company changed her life to a new page. The emotional seeds planted by Freddy's tenderness and warmth make Katherine realize that he is her true love. But the relationship between the two was denied by Lance Howling - Chairman of Howling Corporation and also Freddy's brother. It seems that between Katherine and Lance there is a hidden relationship, buried deep in the subconscious of both. Freddy gradually discovers that his brother's feelings for Katherine are not simply hate. What will all three of them be? Especially when Freddy was forever separated from Katherine in a traffic accident.

Two weeks before our wedding, Jonah Alston suddenly wants to postpone it. He says, "Sasha says she's having her first exhibition on that day. She'll be alone during the opening, and I'm worried she'll get stage fright. I have to help her. We're just going through the motions with the wedding, anyway. What does it matter whether it's a day earlier or later?" This isn't his first time postponing our wedding for Sasha Lester's sake, though. The first time he did it was because he claimed she missed having homecooked food after undergoing surgery. He'd flown abroad to care for her for two months. The second time was because he said she wanted to head into the mountains to get inspired. He'd gone with her out of concern for her safety. Now, this is the third time. I hang up and look at Austin Everett, my childhood sweetheart. He sits across from me, looking leisurely as he taps his emerald-embedded walking cane on the marble floor. I ask, "Do you need a wife?" On my wedding day, Sasha holds up her glass and waits for Jonah to clink it with his. However, his eyes are red as he watches a livestream—it's the wedding of the scion of Everett Group, the country's largest property development company.

Si Axxelle Madrigal ang naging pinakabata na naging CEO, sa edad niyang 18 years old, tinanggap niya ang responsibility bilang CEO. Si Larissa Bernardo ang unang babae na minahal ng CEO na si Axxelle. Inaya ni Axxelle ang magulang ni Larissa na magtrabaho sa kaniyang food company at kumita ng milyon sa loob lamang ng ilang buwan. Kapalit noon ay ang arrange marriage ni Axxelle sa nag-iisa nilang anak na si Larissa.

My Alpha mate Derek secretly inherited his sister-in-law Sarah after his brother's death. On the surface, I was his Luna, but in reality, Sarah was the one who truly held his heart. He praised me as the most exceptional Luna, tasking me with caring for all pack members, yet when Sarah tended to an injured male wolf, his jealousy flared so violently that he bit off the poor wolf's paw. In public, he proclaimed me as his beloved Luna to the entire pack, while keeping Sarah hidden safely in the shadows. When enemy wolves kidnapped me after discovering my identity, I desperately reached out through our mind link, begging for help. His response cut deeper than any physical wound: "Olivia, Sarah is carrying my pup. We'll tell everyone it's my brother's son. I must protect her and the baby without leaving her side for even a moment." "Just endure for a few days. Once Sarah's morning sickness improves, I'll lead all our warriors to rescue you." In the days that followed, I sent countless pleas for help through our link, but received nothing in return. Eventually, our connection shattered completely. For an entire year, those wolves imprisoned and tortured me. They broke my hind legs and ripped out my fangs, stripping me of my wolf's dignity. Derek never came for me. When I finally escaped and stumbled back to our territory, blood-soaked and broken, I discovered my daughter locked in the silver prison where rogue wolves were kept. She was being torn apart as food, her small body covered in wounds. Meanwhile, my mate—my pup's father—was joyfully celebrating the first birthday of his and Sarah's pup, announcing that Sarah's child would become the pack's heir. Tears streaming down my face, I gathered my skeletal little pup in my arms. "It’s OK, sweetie. I'll find you a better dad."

Meet Elijah The quiet yet smart and dangerous when provoked man is the CEO to a successful world renowned fast food restaurant He is always busy running his business and taking care of his grandmother, in fact too busy that he never had a romantic relationship thinking love is a waste of time until he met her Meet Violet The fiercest girl on the planet, bold, beautiful and tough. She is ready to fulfill all her dreams and ambitions, dreams to fall in love with a college jock, dreams to give her younger sister the world, dreams to go to college and have the best life at campus, but most importantly dreams to become a famous jeweler What happens when she meets him and discovers a terrible truth which causes all her dreams to be shattered The story of a love so beautiful yet hard to claim A Love that gives hope, peace, happiness, and comfort but is hard to fight for -------------------------------------- "why me, out of all other girls out there, why do you choose to love me?" she whispers to him "my heart chose you and you are the only one that holds a special place there" he whispers back "you mean the world to me and there is nothing I won't do for you, love" He said to her with a smile before kissing her passionately