Fucked Up Jokes

I fucked the daughter of my best buddy. Now I have to safeguard her. Skye needs to learn how to swim in my infinity pool. That sounds like a great deal. And I know precisely what my malicious purpose is. Take her in the water with my hands on her curves. I know it's terrible, but she's as desperate as I am. Our affair will be our little secret. My former business partner, on the other hand, is out for vengeance. He's threatening to go public and reveal our identities. It'll wreck us both. So I'll be one step ahead of him. I'll protect her... even if it means marrying her.

R Rated Novel. Contains Dark and Mature Romance with Violent Scenes. Proceed with Caution. Come join and listen to Chanel Brown tell her story as she becomes the object of obsession of Alfonso De Rosa. Chanel Brown was in a mess. She needed a lot of money and she needed it fast. Her job was not giving her enough and she was having a hard time.Alfonso only saw it one way. He had been fucked over by someone he loved. She betrayed him all for money. He was going to get his own back. What could go wrong when Alfonso and Chanel meet again?THIS BOOK CONTAINS SEXUAL CONTENT AND VIOLENCE.

Pacarku, Bima Arya, divonis menderita kanker dan membutuhkan transplantasi hati. Begitu tahu aku cocok jadi donor, tanpa ragu aku langsung memutuskan untuk menjalani operasi. Dua per tiga hatiku diangkat, rasa sakitnya luar biasa. Namun, saat sadar, hal pertama yang kulakukan adalah memeriksa keadaannya. Di depan kamarnya, aku mendengar dia berbicara dengan temannya. "Kak Bima, kamu benar-benar genius. Bisa-bisanya kepikiran cara balas dendam sehebat ini." Bima tertawa kecil. "Kalau saja aku nggak mau buat masalah besar, sebenarnya aku ingin ambil ginjalnya buat main-main." "Semua ini gara-gara Nimas, Vivi jadi gagal ujian masuk universitas dan harus kuliah di luar negeri. Sebulan lagi Vivi akan pulang ke dalam negeri dan saat itulah aku akan sepenuhnya putus dari Nimas."

ASTRID SAGE Everyone calls me naive and innocent, and in every way, I am. When I took a fancy in peering at FREDERICK SALVATORE each time he stopped by the orphanage to drop off his donation, it was just out of mere curiosity. I find him fascinating and alluring, like a piece of art. But when I get kidnapped and put up for auction, he's in the crowd of the deadliest people I've ever seen. He put the craziest bid on me and I get to find out that his name isn't FREDRICK SALVATORE. He's the notorious EAGAN KING and this is his world. Now I understand why he has that unexplainable dark aura around him. Is it possible to find him less fascinating now that I know what he's truly like? EAGAN KING A monster. A killer. A sociopath. A greedy-ass bastard. The devil. Everyone has different names for me, and they're right. I'm all of that and more. I wanna own this hell and rule these bastards. I wanna own LOVE ISLAND CITY. But to own it, I have to kill the real owner. Seven families are topping the hierarchy. I've killed three, I'm left with four. I attend this auction event to figure out the weaknesses of my next target. And then there she is, looking very virgin-ish and fucking innocent, standing on the auction ground with fear in her eyes. Bidding her was not part of my plan. But I'll be fucked up if I let these motherfuckers have her. (Warning: this is a dark romance, not for the faint-hearted. Read at your own risk and please, no criticisms.)

“Oh do not cover up on my account. Not like there’s anything here I’ve not seen before.” “Keep your voice down idiot! I do not want people knowing that I fucked the most arrogant guy in this school.” I hissed but the bastard just shrugged and kept eating his chips. “Or that we are mates - it will be interesting to see how hiding THAT will work.” “I don’t care…” “Especially since every single time I see you, there’s this undeniable urge to…hold you…touch you- and do things to you that are beyond your wildest imagination.” I swallowed. Hard. Because damnit, I felt the same way too. Rules be damned. ----- When seventeen-year-old Aria Chen’s world crumbles in a single morning—divorce papers, cheating boyfriends, and a supernatural storm that tears through her high school bathroom—she discovers that some breakdowns are actually breakthroughs. Whisked away to Aethermoor Academy, a hidden school for those with elemental gifts, Aria thinks she’s finally found where she belongs. But one drugged drink and a passionate night with a brooding werewolf later, she’s thrust into a world of magical politics, dangerous enemies, and three supernatural guardians who may be more than she bargained for. Between mastering her storm magic and navigating the treacherous social hierarchies of magical society, Aria must learn to trust her power—and her heart—before her past catches up with her and her newfound family tears itself apart. Some storms destroy everything in their path. Others clear the way for something beautiful to grow.

Mahira married a man who never loved her. Her husband always treated Mahira harshly. One night, Mahira thought that her husband had changed. He fucked her gently; never in Mahira's life had she needed anything as special as that night. But who would have thought that it was not Mahira's husband, another man who was drunk had defiled Mahira. The man was none other than Mahira's best friend, now Mahira's brother-in-law. How will Mahira live her life? And can Mahira get away from her husband who never treated Mahira well?

Lisa Knox The day I caught my husband and my sister having sex on the bed while my son had drowned in the pool was the day I made my decision and stood by it. Nothing was going to make me stay in this five years marriage. So, I took the divorce papers, signed it and left everything behind. Including the wealth and company I Inherited from my late dad. I had handed everything in my life over to him when I was blinded by love. Now, I vowed as I stepped out to get back everything until my sister and my ex husband are reduced to nothing. * Andrew McCarthy The day before my wedding, I had caught my first love and wife-to-be getting fucked by my PA in the study room. I had said nothing and simply went out to drink, completely hopeless for love. There I met her, a beautiful young lady whom I could use for the night. The sex had been good but that was about it. I cancelled the wedding when I got a call to come back home and take up the responsibility of a father, to adopt my niece because my twin brother had just been murdered. Five years later, everything is in chaos and I need a woman who is experienced in raising children who will stay. So when I met that lady from the one night stand again, I made up my mind to have her for myself. She would be my wife and would raise my daughter, no matter what.

Elizabeth Kennedy, an orphan who doesn’t want anything but a normal life. She wants a quiet life away from all the complicated fucked up, scheming life that others live. She doesn’t have money, friends, and family to call her own. A lone girl making her living with a part-time job and all the odd jobs she can to make money. Supporting herself is tiring sometimes but she has no other options. She just wants to complete her college and find a decent job to make life easier. She is a simple girl with a difficult life until she meets him. Christian Ford is a billionaire who can get everything he wants with just one word. People respect him, fear him, scheme around him but can never take advantage of him. He lives a carefree life. He never has such feelings until he meets Elizabeth. Something in her attracts him, and her blue eyes capture his heart. He is pulled towards her unconsciously. He decides then and there that he will make her his. But the question is that he has a secret. Will Elizabeth accept his Darkside and be willing to be with him? Somehow, Elizabeth ends up tangled in all the scheming, dangers because of Christian. She tries to escape; he finds her every time. Will she survive all the hardship and get together with Christian? Can Christian protect Lisa and make her his? Will Lisa be able to escape from his clutch? Or will she fall for him? Let 's read and find the answers.

Three years ago, I drugged the mafia heir, Vincent. After that one wild night, he didn’t kill me. Instead, he fucked me until my legs went weak, gripping my waist and whispering the same word over and over: “Principessa.” Just as I was about to propose, his first love, Isabella, returned. To keep her happy, Vincent let a car hit me, had my mother’s heirlooms thrown to stray dogs, and sent me to prison… But when I was finally broken, flying to Boston to marry someone else, Vincent tore New York City apart to find me.

I fell for Don Lorenzo Moretti the second I saw him. Hard. As a mafia princess, I wasn't supposed to chase anyone. But for him, I swallowed my pride and made him my mission. A year later, he finally had me, pinning me to the bed as he moved inside me. His eyes were pure fire, and in that mo ment, they saw only me. For ten years, we were electric. We fucked in five-star hotels all over the world. We just fit. I was his lucky charm at the poker table. I took shots for him until I bled from my stomach. I even took a bullet for him. Then came our engagement party. Lorenzo left me standing there alone. Said something "came up." I went back to our apartment, only to find him kissing my stepsister, Juliana. That’s when I knew. He had always loved her. I was just a stand-in. He tried to explain, words tumbling out in a panicked rush, promising a bigger, better party to make up for it. A laugh, cold and hollow, died in my throat. I turned my back on him, pulled out my phone, and called my mother in Sicily. "I'll marry into the Romano family."