Funny Alcohol Quotes

Two months into my cold war with Sean, the lover he’d been keeping finally danced her way right up to me, the real deal. Everyone expected me to react the same way I always had before, kicking up a huge scene to stake my claim. Instead, I looked at the intimate photos of Sean and her in the group chat, smiled, and sent them my blessing. [Looking good. Wishing you two a long and happy life.] The chat went dead silent. Sean must’ve sobered up from his little paradise because in the middle of the night, he drove home and pounded on my door. He was furious. “Do you think this is funny?” However, I only met his gaze calmly. “Honestly, after all these years, none of it is.”

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

WARNING: R-18 l MATURE CONTENT l SPG l VERY SEXUAL l READ RESPONSIBLY It's funny how someone breaks your heart but you still love them with all you have... Bullied and criticized for being plus size girl, but who cares? Food is life. Myra Gwy Valderamos is the unbothered queen. The only thing that matter to her is food. Loved and treasured by her parents. Supported in all her dreams. Calyx Zachary Villegas stuck in the past and the mystery behind it. Broken at a very young age when both parents died in an accident. They met, fell in love and planned a future together but a buried memory of the past resurfaced. He left her shattered and broken into pieces. How far you would you go for your love? Is his love enough to have her back?

Deo, seorang pelajar SMA yang terkenal setia, penyabar dan lembut pada perempuan, menjadi berubah 180 derajat. Menyakiti dan mempermainkan perempuan kini menjadi hobi baru nya. Bahkan kini, orang orang menyebutnya sebagai Fakboi. Lantas, apakah yang melatar belakangi perubahan sikap nya?.

Jericho Astor, the youngest Astor brother and by far the sweetest of the three is a genius when it comes to anything technology—and when it comes to Odette Gibson. Odette Gibson, a cop who just happens to be Jericho's best friend probably knows Jericho better than he knows himself. It's what makes their friendship so strong, it's what keeps them bonded. But, there's a thin line between friendship and something a little more than that and Jericho has been straddling that line for years, until one day he found himself in the deep end drowning in feelings for her that she would never return. Or maybe she will if the hands of fate have anything to do with it... _____________________________ Read book 1: Gunnar, and book 2: Ace. If you don't read the first two books, the third won't make sense.

Jessica has some explaining to do. Not only has she lied to her best friend, but she is lying to the father of their daughter. But it's not her fault that she fell in love with the man the day they met. Jessica remembers that day like it was yesterday. His smooth skin, sparkling smile, and beautiful eyes are something that haunts her dreams every night. Jessica had told Christine that the father knew about Adamelia, but that was a lie. Jessica had told the father of her child that she doesn't love him, but that was also a lie. Jessica has even told herself that she has moved on. That was a huge lie. Wallowing in shame and guilt, Jessica has decided that it is her punishment. She was the one who created the web of lies in the first place. Now she will do everything in her power to right her wrongs.

 I was married to this sexy hot chic. Nung sinabi ni Dad at Lolo na ipagkakasundo niya ako sa babaeng yun ay hindi na ako nagpatumpiktumpik pa at pumayag agad sa alok nila. Isa pa maganda na nga, sexy at hot pa ang mapapangasawa ko. Kaya nga hindi ko lubos maisip kung bakit nangangamba ang mga Montefalco sa anak nila. Sabi nila baka daw hindi mag asawa ang anak nila at maging tomboy ito. Fck! Sa ganda at sexy niyang yan nangangamba silang maging tomboy yun? Eh baka 'pag nakita niya itong walong abs ko ay magwala na yan. Pero napaurong ang dila ko nang malaman ko ang kinakatakutan nila at pinangangambahan. Mukhang tomboy nga ito eh! Damn! I was just married to my wife, not just an ordinary wife but fck, to an EXTRAORDINARY WIFE!  Lolo, Daddy pwede pa bang mag backout?  

Pia Norman is not your average human girl. She is nosy and playfull and a princess of the vandari kingdom . On the other side of the world is Dylan Pendragon who is a cocky, arrogant and a flirty lycan prince What does fate has in store for a this arrogant and flirty lycan prince who is meant to be mated to a nosy and playful orphan princess Extract Dylan's POV The seer walks to the middle of the hall. Walking like it's something very urgent then the King gestured for her to speak. "There is going to be an imbalance in nature and it's going to be soon" said the seer. Everyone face looked pale even Queen Adaline my mother was shocked and asked "how" looking confused The seer stamatia continued.... "A lady will come into the royal family and cause the destruction of lycans and werewolves with her powers" . "Then how do we stop her from coming or destroying us" Dominique questioned getting impatient. The seer thought for a while and continued " we can't stop it from happening but when she is here we will definately do something about the situation" "Then let's find her and kill her" I said leaving the hall.....

To escape from the evil plan of her stepmom and the man she chose to be her husband, Ann Villamor escapes from the province to the city and also to find her boyfriend whom she lost contact for a month. Since she has nowhere to stay, she was tricked by, Edu, a stranger who almost hit her with his car and becomes a maid for his blind nephew. She will need to spy on Karl Ibarra, a car racer, a billionaire, and a mafia leader who suddenly lost his eyesight after an accident occurs while he was participating in a contest. Meanwhile, because of his blindness, Karl becomes grumpy. From a cheerful person that was loved by everyone, he turns into a serious and scary man that was feared by all the people around him. But when he meets his cheerful and fearless new maid, his scary personality slowly changes because of her. He learns how to laugh despite his illness and most of all, he learns how to love which he didn't expect he could feel again after her girlfriend died. But what if he learns that Ann is a spy that was sent by his uncle whom he suspected was the person behind his accident that caused his girlfriend to die three years ago? Will he still be willing to fight for his love or just return for being a grumpy and scary person?

Stell is a member of the popular band "high-end." As a member of a famous band, he is accustomed to everything he wants, he gets. Everything he wants goes to him. Everyone praises and adores him. Everyone who likes him, walking to dangerous lane just to crossed and see him. While on the other hand, Sieme, a number one fan of high-end bands. Different from what Stell expected to Sieme, Sieme has no interest to him. For Sieme, Stell was nothing but a plain member of the band that Sieme's adore. And Stell was surprised because of Sieme's reaction towards to him. Unusual to not getting what he wanted, Stell found a way to get closer to Sieme, and that was through Aishia --- Sieme's best friend. On his way along to Semie's heart, will Stell can pass the lane? Or he will make a u-turn, to come back and find another way to another lane?