Funny Deer Blind Dad Jokes

Xevia Brielle, a young omega, daughter of an enslaved who works for the Ivyari family, is lulled by the seductions of the youngest alpha prince in the Ivyari family, Alarick Dereck Ivyari. Their illicit relationship has made Xevia pregnant. Now that she is pregnant, Alarick betrays and refuses to admit the baby. As punishment, Xevia was banished from the pack. She was dumped into the middle of the terrible depths of a dark forest known as the abode of rogues. However, poor Xevia's life was saved by a wolf from a group of rogues. He is Xander Levon Balstair. The Rogue prince, who was blind, was cold, arrogant, and high-tempered. Her life was like jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. Xevia had to give herself up to mating with Xander. Every day she wished death would come to her rather than having to spend her entire life accompanying that arrogant and evil blind man. However, all that hatred and rejection will end when she learns about a truth that opens her mind and heart.

When the college admission notice arrived, I suddenly developed a high fever and was bedridden. My sister encountered a kidnapping on her way to help me collect the notice, and her life was uncertain. My parents hated me deeply. After tearing up my admission notice, they forced me to give up my studies and work in a factory. Later, I experienced a kidnapping as well. After narrowly escaping, I hid in an abandoned factory and sent them a message for help. My dad called me and shouted at me without restraint, “Lena, are you even human? How could you play such a joke on us on Jessica's memorial day!” “Do you have any idea how much your mom and I wished it had been you who died back then?” In my last moments before death, their insults echoed in my ears. I was tortured and killed, turned into a monster, and my body was thrown into a stinking ditch for three full days. Even my father, the most experienced forensic expert, couldn’t recognize me. When my sister returned home with the guy she eloped with years ago, my dad had just restored my appearance through technology. They knelt before my decaying corpse and cried until they fainted.

Matagal ng inaasam ni Cecelia Raymundo na mabuntis siya, pero noong araw na nalaman niyang buntis siya ay ang araw rin na natuklasan n’ya na pinagtataksilan siya ng kanyang asawang si Maxwell de Silva at ng kanyang bestfriend na si Valentina Dionisio. Dahil isa siyang bulag at inakala ng mga ito ay hindi niya malalaman. Nagpanggap s’ya na hindi ‘yon alam at noong araw na ibibigay ng kanyang ama ang kompanya nito sa asawa n’ya ay inagaw niya ‘yon subalit hindi n’ya inaasahan na makunan siya. Sa tindi ng galit ay nilisan n’ya ang Pilipinas, pinagamot ang mga mata at muling bumalik para maghiganti. Malinaw na niyang nakikita ang magandang buhay ng asawa niya at kabit nito. Gusto n’ya lamang sirain ang mga ito pero hindi niya inaasahan na maka-one night stand niya si Magnus Quinn de Silva—ang nakatakdang pakakasalan niya at ang tiyuhin ng dating asawa. Subalit ang tunay na layunin nito ay gagawin lamang siyang trophy wife. Nasa rurok na s’ya ng tagumpay ng muling bumalik si Maxwell at nagmakaawang hiwalayan niya ang tiyuhin nito.

Brandon Kane, The Gamma of The Southern Werewolves Pack, volunteers for a dangerous undercover mission to locate a long list of missing girls who are all rumored to be auctioned in the largest sex-trafficking business run by a vampire named Kennedy Strauss. Going in with no backup and very little reliable information, Brandon has to face the ugly reality of the underworld business. He has to make his way in and out without blowing his undercover and not putting the people he was sent to rescue at risk. Celeste Diamond is the underworld's renowned assassin known as the Blind Bandit, who works for diamonds. A highly skilled and incredibly sexy, the Blind Bandit is the elite bodyguard of Kennedy Strauss who barely leaves his side. While it seems she is driven by her duty to protect her employer, Celeste's true motive is far greater than her duty to the vampire businessman. She is blind, but it's not her inability to see that concerned him. She sees him coming.

Audrey has a crush on her best friend single father, Mr. Knight from a young age. She didn’t dare to tell him because Knight had always taken her as his daughter because of the huge age gap. At her 18th birthday, she finally had the courage to confess to him but shit hits the fan as she finds him kissing her sister. Feeling betrayed she heads off to college and tries moving on until he comes finding her…and this time he isn't willing to back down.

Nalasing si Everest dahil sa may hinalo sa kanyang inumin ng kapatid niya at imbes na pumunta sa kuwarto na kinuha nito para sa kanya ay maling kuwarto ang napasukan niya! There, she met the man with hypnotising eyes at tulad niya ay lasing din ito. With the drug overtaking her body, they have s3x the first they met. Kinabukasan ay agad siya nitong inalok ng kasal na tinanggihan niya. Pero paano kung malaman niya na ang lalaking ito ay isa pala sa pinakamayamang tao sa bansa at handa siyang ipakidnap para lang pumayag na magpakasal dito? Hi! This is the book 2 of Blind Date Gone Wrong The Hottest Billionaire Became My Fia. Nasa chapter po kung saan mag i start ang book 2.

People hope not to date an abusive partner but wouldn't it be worse when you are already married? She was used, abused and stepped on. All hope was lost and she vowed to only live for the sake of her children, no more hiding in the shadows of others ...Work hard and repay. Meet Eleana Osas, a single mom of two who vowed to get her revenge on her ex husband and shun all men. What will happen when she cross path with the soon to be biggest boss, Shawn Dele, who is handsomely mysterious. Will he be able to untie the knot in her heart or would he make her hate men more? Curious? Then follow up and don't forget to add it to your library. Anticipate!!!!!......... Excerpt: "So you vow to never love, never be with another man? Is this the kind of control he has over you?", Shawn asked feeling waves of emotions; anger, disappointment..... "It's the kind of control I have over my self, I will never, ever submit myself to any man again, never", Eleana replied, gritting her teeth in anger, not directed at Shawn but herself - she only spoke those words because she need him to let her go, else she fall more than she already has..... Seeing as Shawn didn't reply, Eleana walked past him but Shawn was having none of that, he turned around and grab her arms, pulling her closer to him making sure she could feel his breathe on her neck as he whispered mischievously. "Are you so certain you will be the one submitting and not me? Hmmm?". His words rang warning bells in Eleana's head as her legs went wobbly under his teasing and nearness.... Oh god! She swore, when she felt his lips on her earlobe.

My father's adopted daughter was only locked in the cramped storage closet for around fifteen minutes, yet he punished me by tying me up and throwing me inside. He even sealed off the ventilation with towels. "As Wendy's older sister, if you can't take care of her, then you should also experience how scared she was," he declared coldly. He knew I was claustrophobic, but my desperate pleas for mercy, my terror, were met with nothing but heartless reprimands. "Let this be a lesson on how to be a good sister." As the last sliver of light disappeared, swallowed by the oppressive darkness, I struggled helplessly. A week passed before my father finally remembered my existence and decided it was time to end my punishment. "Let's hope this week served as a good lesson for you, Jennifer. If this happens again, you will no longer be allowed in this house." He would never know that I had already taken my last breath in that suffocating room. My body had begun to rot in the darkness.

The old saying goes, “You may feel good mistreating your spouse, but trying to win them back will be a laborious task.”Before the divorce, Michael saw Ivanka as a heartless, self-serving woman who would stop at nothing to reach her goals. But after the split, the man who once declared that “falling in love makes you a fool” became the fool himself. “Marry me, honey. I love you,” he pleaded. “Marry me, honey. I’m sorry,” he begged. “Marry me, honey. I’ll make it up to you for the rest of my life,” he promised. Ivanka simply retorted, “Would you please stop following me around? You’re driving me crazy. Are you a dog or what?” To this, Michael replied, “I’m your lapdog, honey. I’ll only bark for you.”Ivanka smirked. As a successful lawyer, renowned physician, and elite hacker, why would she ever consider remarrying this worthless man and becoming his caretaker once again?“I won’t remarry you, you b*stard. Stay away from me,” she declared.

Sneak peek: "W-what are you doing?" I asked, my breathing getting heavier as his warm fingers inched towards my bikini bottom. "You called me a coward earlier, remember?" He asked, his other hand wrapped around my throat and lips torturingly brushing over mine "So let's see how much you can handle if I break the boundaries." "I haven't said anything wrong," I breathed out, the collision of the heat of our bodies made the wetness between my thighs build more "Oh really?" He hooked my legs around his waist leaving me surprised I opened my mouth to say something but before any sentence could leave my mouth, sliding past my bikini bottom his fingers were there on my bare clit and the next second they thrust inside the very tight hole of mine leaving me to scream. But everything went silent as he pressed his hot lips upon mine just as I had been wanting since the first day I had ever seen him. **** I always knew the things I felt for Jacob Adriano were wrong in so many ways. He was my dad's best friend, totally out of bounds but I couldn't stop wanting him. And once in the event of my dad's destination wedding, I came across him after years...I lost every one of the boundaries I had and surely I planned to make him lose his ones too. After all Jacob Adriano, the sinfully attractive Italian was not unaware of my obsession with him. But little did know that forbidden relationships always bring havoc and demolition.....