Funny Deer Blind Dad Jokes Novels & Stories

I was once Fiona's consigliere. I put the Falcone Family in her hands，helping her become the untouchable Don. And when a rival family put out a hit, I took the car bomb meant for her. It cost me my eyes. She knelt by my hospital bed and swore a blood oath. She would be my eyes. I would be her only husband. Later, after an operation by a top surgeon, my eyes recovered. I couldn't wait to rush home to surprise her. But when I pushed open the door, I saw her tangled together with Leo, her bodyguard, on the desk I had custom-made for her. Fiona was pressed against Leo in revealing clothing, her face flushed. Crumpled white tissues littered the floor. Between ragged breaths, she called Leo’s name repeatedly. "Fiona, why are you still keeping that useless blind fuck around? Let me take care of him for you." "Leo, shut up. I need more time. Now, get inside me. That's all that matters." The Chicago winter rain was bone-chilling that night. I completely gave up. After walking out of the house in just my shirt, I pulled out my phone and booked a one-way ticket to Sicily. I will cut ties completely with this family and with her.

I am the hated true daughter of my family. One day, I was kidnapped along with my sister. The kidnappers cut off a section of my finger and sent it to my parents. But they just thanked God that the kidnappers had not cut off my sister’s finger. They deciphered the hint from my sister and alerted the police, but the kidnappers learned about it. To protect my sister, they told the kidnappers that I was the one who revealed the address to them. Because of it, I was tortured to death while my sister was saved. Oddly, when my parents found my mangled body, they broke down and said that they were going to make my sister and the kidnappers pay.

My CEO boyfriend, Norris Chapman, whom I've been dating for five years, takes me to his childhood home to visit his parents during Christmas. After that, he proceeds to propose to me in the villa's garden, which was intricately decorated in advance. Happily, I accept his proposal. I wanted to wait till nightfall before telling Norris that I actually hail from a wealthy family as well, only that I ran away from home after fighting with my dad. But unexpectedly, Norris drugs me immediately after dinner. By the time I wake up, I'm already bound in ropes. "I'm sorry, Winnie. I don't have a choice at all. The debt collectors are about to show up on my doorstep soon. "It's your fault for looking just like the mistress Mr. Greven is looking for. Once I sell you to him, I'll definitely be able to clear my debt right away. "Since you love me so much, you won't blame me for this, right?" The moment I hear the words "Mr. Greven", I'm left feeling stunned. There's only one Greven family in the entire list of wealthy families in the country. It also happens to be my family. Could it be that… Norris plans to sell me to my dad?

Gabrielle ran from her wedding to Jared… and woke up wearing Damon’s ring. He’s cold, wealthy, and dangerously irresistible — a man who swore he couldn’t feel anything. Until her. She’s the runaway bride he turned into his wife. Now she’s trapped in his penthouse wearing his shirt, his ring… and maybe, just maybe, teaching him how to feel again. ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING This story is intended strictly for adult audiences aged 18 and above. The book explores passion, desire, power, and emotional conflict, delving into the complexities of love, lust, and control. It features dark romance elements, including manipulation, obsession, dominance, moral ambiguity, toxic dynamics, and unhealthy relationships portrayed solely for plot purposes. These themes are not meant to be romanticized, endorsed, or implemented in real life. Readers should expect graphic sexual descriptions, BDSM, explicit language, and mature emotional themes, as well as elements of dark humor, identity crisis, childhood trauma, and emotional numbness. Due to the intensity of these topics, reader discretion is strongly advised. This story is written for entertainment and storytelling purposes only. The author does not endorse or glorify harmful behavior. Copyright © 2025 by Siemuri Daniella. All rights reserved. This is a work of fiction; any resemblance to real persons or events is purely coincidental. BOOK 1 of the Veins Of Darkness Series — interconnected standalone dark romance novels. BOOK 1 – Accidentally Married to the Billionaire Single Dad BOOK 2 – Forced Marriage to My Mafia Ex-Boyfriend BOOK 3 – Coming Soon BOOK 4 – Coming Soon

From a stall in the office restroom, I overhear someone badmouthing me. Henry Fielder, the intern I've been mentoring for three months, grumbles, "The guy's got zero people skills. He's a total fossil, like a robot stuck in one mode." I'm about to push the door open and jump in when someone laughs and piles on. "The paperwork is incomplete. The receipts aren't compliant. I can't reimburse it without a manager's signature. We could recite his canned empathy lines in our sleep!" Once they're gone, I quietly head back to my office. Later, Henry drops a thick stack of expense reports onto my desk. "Quit waving the rulebook and rejecting everyone's reimbursements." I skim the fake receipts, and for once, I don't call him out. Instead, I give a thin smile and say, "I have a headache. I can't make out the words."

Gisella Molinero was forced and framed to marry a blind Italian business tycoon because of her family. Reluctant to accept the marriage at first, she kept a distance from her nominal husband. But his love and respect slowly unsealed her heart... The Caruso Series Book 1: Falling for The Blind Billionaire Book 2: The Billionaire Ex-Lover's Revenge

Ever since I find out that my CEO husband, Rowan Goodwin, is incapable of letting his first love, Megan Dolton—who's divorced and has a child of her own—go, I begin teaching our son, Ryan Goodwin, to address Rowan as "Mr. Goodwin" all the time. When Ryan is burning up with a fever, Megan chooses to summon Rowan away from us in the middle of the night. As I caress Ryan's scalding forehead, I instruct him to tell Rowan, "Goodbye, Mr. Goodwin." When Rowan has agreed to attend the teacher-parent conference with Ryan, Megan calls him with tears streaking down her cheeks, claiming that her own son, Nelson Herrera, doesn't have a father to accompany him. So, Rowan doesn't hesitate to ditch us once again. Without bothering to raise my head, I pass my phone to Ryan so that he can take leave for "Mr. Goodwin" in the parents' group chat. Every time, Ryan always hesitates for a long time before carrying out my orders. Later on, Rowan finally realizes that he has owed us far too much. So, he takes the initiative to suggest that we take a family portrait together. When we reach the photography studio, Megan calls Rowan once again. Her sobs can be heard drifting from the loudspeaker. "Rowan, can you please come over and pick Nelson up from school? The children at the kindergarten keep making fun of him for not having a father…" Pity crosses Rowan's expression immediately. He's about to crouch down and explain to Ryan when the latter just waves airily at him without me having to nudge him. "It's fine, Mr. Goodwin. You should accompany the other child. Mommy and I are the only ones needed for the family portrait."

My husband, Matthew Glover, fabricates a scandal to help his childhood sweetheart, reporter Melanie Reed, boost her numbers. "Mrs. Glover Sleeps Around—Multiple Affairs Lead to Repeated Miscarriages." He uses it as a gimmick to grab attention. Next thing I know, my name's in the mud and the internet's tearing me to pieces. When I bring up divorce, Matthew says I'm blowing things out of proportion. "Melanie just started at the TV station. If she doesn't deliver, her coworkers will laugh at her. You're just doing her a favor. It's not like you're actually losing anything." I don't even bother arguing with him. I simply push the divorce agreement toward him. "If you want to help her, go ahead. But we're getting divorced!"

" Your father?? Bryan is your father?? " Ava asked, stunned. Jayden nodded, his face expressionless " Yeah " Bryan stared between his son and his own girlfriend, who happened to be his son's ex. And he wanted her back, he knew his son too well and he could see that Jayden wanted Ava back. Jayden turned to his father " Dad, is she your girlfriend? " He asked, desperately hoping it wasn't true but his hope was dashed when his father nodded. " Sh*t " Came out of his mouth as he hit his fist on the wall in suppressed anger. He turned to his father " She's my girlfriend, Dad " he declared. " Ex girlfriend " Ava corrected, her nose flaring in anger.

She spent three years blind, pouring every ounce of love into her billionaire husband while doctors fought to restore her sight. On the day light finally returned, Clover Voss walked into Damian's office expecting joy and found his hand caressing his pregnant best friend's belly, whispering promises to their unborn child. Betrayed and heart shattered, she signs the divorce papers in fury and drowns the pain in tequila and one reckless night in the arms of a dangerous stranger–a ruthless mafia billionaire CEO who takes what he wants and never lets go. Now the world will watch as the woman he left in the dark rises, paints her pain into a masterpiece of revenge, and forces the mighty Damian Hale to his knees.