I Can Deny It No Longer Novels & Stories

Because all the way to the car, all the way with my pulse still too high and my thoughts coming apart at the edges, one sentence kept trying to surface and I kept shoving it back down. I’m not gay. I’m not. I’m not. But for the first time, the denial sounded thin even to me.

I mentally curse myself for stuttering. “Don't try to change the subject. You were telling me how gay I act last time." He impassively says. “I...I...I...don't...I don't know what you are talking about." Denying it is probably the most stupid thing to do, but I don't have any other option. He raises his brows at me and rests on the counter while crossing his arms. “Do you think I am a fool? We just had a conversation about me being gay, and now you are saying that you don't know what I am talking about."

I nodded in agreement. I was tired of denying the truth. I was tired of pushing back. It was about time I finally accepted my future. Maybe not as easy as one would hope, but everything about me was defiant. "Lets' get to it."

He held it with the full weight of what it was — not the complement in the social register but the honest statement of a man who had catalogued Ernest West over many years and had arrived at this conclusion on the evidence. "Thank you," Ernest said. "The connection is undeniable," Don said. It was not a romantic formulation. It was the statement of a fact. "It has always been undeniable. We denied it — imperfectly, at cost, for a period of years — and then we stopped denying it and came back to it. Because you cannot deny an undeniable thing indefinitely. Eventually the evidence accumulates past the point of denial." "Yes," Ernest said.

“That love and good intentions will carry you through. That if you just endure enough, things will work out.” “That’s not weakness,” I said. “No,” she agreed. “It’s denial.” I shook my head. “You don’t know me anymore.” She stepped closer, lowering her voice. “I know you better than you know yourself.” I laughed bitterly. “That’s arrogant, even for you.” “Is it?” she asked. “You couldn’t even change your name.” “That again,” I snapped. “Stop bringing that up.” “Why?” she pressed. “Because it proves my point?”

Jack stared at me in disbelief. "We spent ten years filling that album. You said we would show it at our wedding. How could you just burn it? If you saw a cockroach, you could have waited for me, or at least messaged me. I would have handled it." I didn't even bother looking at him. The man standing in front of me wasn't the same one who once looked at me like I was his entire world. "You've been so busy lately. I didn't want to bother you with something so trivial," I said.

“Sorry to drink your sweet wine, but the only reason I refused him buying me a bigger apartment is that I plan to move in with him.” This time, Juana’s expression changed. The soft façade was gone, but in its place was a much greater vulnerability she wasn’t afraid to hide. “What can I do to make you leave him?” she cried. Delanie leaned back in her swivel chair. “Well, I’m not that cheap. Four trillion will do.” She mentioned trillion, knowing that both Juana and Robert would not be able to afford it and besides, if they had that kind of money, then they won’t be arranging a marriage for Wade.

"Stop pestering me, Jason. Don't make me despise you even more." The almighty Mr. Brown finally showed a look of utter defeat, forced to watch helplessly as Nathaniel and I walked hand in hand into our future. He knew this time, I would never look back.

“But why can’t you just admit it? Really? Not even to yourself? Acceptance is where it all begins, just so you know.” His jaw tightened, his expression twisting in obvious displeasure. I folded my arms, savoring the tension. “I’d like to offer some unsolicited but valuable advice. Listen closely. Next time, if you’re going to stay in denial, make sure you leave no trace behind. That way, you can cover yourself completely.”