Novel & Cerita My Body Is Not An Apology

"Tanashiri, I lived a living hell all my life, but you and your mother changed it. I was so busy being a good businessman, that I forgot to be a good husband and father. I became less than that of an animal, and I became a scumbag. I am sorry, my dear son." "I put pressure on myself because I never did have heard any words of acceptance from your grandfather. He saw me in the past as trash, and up to now, he still treats me like trash. That is why I strived and pushed myself to be filthy rich and successful, that I forgot to have humanity in me. My egotistical toxic masculinity intoxicated me. I am so sorry, even a million words of apologies won't be enough for you and your Mother to forgive

I swore I would, but didn't! I saw how tired you were. How you bent yourself for people who never deserve it. How you swallowed things you should’ve screamed. I saw it all but did nothing. I know this apology won’t fix anything. I know saying “I’m sorry” won’t undo the years I made you feel small, or lonely, or invisible. But I need you to hear it. I’m sorry. I'm completely and utterly sorry for everything that I was, and everything I failed to be.

He spoke out with so much piety evident in his tone. But I wasn’t intending to let things slide, especially not that easily. “Okay? So what do I do with your apologies? Reverse time back and make things right? Or it makes things better than it is now? No right? Exactly! That’s how meaningless your apology is.” I spat out and reached for the door to close it but he broke into the room.

“I was wrong.” “I fail to see the issue,” he says mildly. I step closer to him. “An apology, for your information, includes more groveling.” “It does?” “Yes,” I say, so close that I could poke him in the chest if I wanted to. “And pray, tell me how my apology could have included a grovel.” I do poke him in the chest then. “You’ll just have to figure it out.” Wow. His pecs are hard like rocks. Firm is an understatement.

The tiredness of someone who has been carrying the weight of another person's cruelty for a very long time and has just been given, unexpectedly, a small portion of it back. "Your apology," I said carefully, "does not change what Noah grew up without. It does not give back the night I spent alone in a hostel room or the morning I took a pregnancy test on a bathroom floor or the year I spent learning how to build something from nothing because everything I had been given had been taken away." I paused. "It does not undo any of it." "I know," she said. "I am not asking you to receive it as payment for a debt. I am asking you to receive it as the truth. From the person who caused the most damag

People I considered friends – all treated me with a callous indifference that made my heart ache. I felt like trash, discarded and worthless. I stood alone, like a ghost. No one saw me, no one heard me, no one cared. Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes as I realized that I'd probably never be forgiven. “How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?” I growled, biting my lips. Bruno turned towards me, “An apology Doesn't bring back our home. An apology doesn't stop the mess you put the whole universe in — so keep your apology and stay the hell away from us. You smell of bad locks and horror.”

I had nothing to apologize for as I didn’t think I did anything wrong apart from existing, but I wanted this all to end because, after everything, I still had the medical house to clean. Ignoring the pain I felt from every inch of my body, I got on my knees slowly and settled my hands on my thighs. I parted my lips to apologize when a new, deep, and very masculine voice came from the crowd. “What’s with this gathering?”

"I'm sorry..." "You don't need to apologize. You need to learn that everyone has their own struggles. You don't know what I've been through. You don't know how long I've cried in front of the mirror. You don't know how many tears fell every time I saw my body in store windows." My tears started to fall, but I didn't care. "But today, I'm proud of myself. Today, for the first time in a long time, I felt happy with my body. And you came and ruined it."

“I sincerely apologize for every stupid thing I’ve done. Everything.” His opening remarks didn’t impress me. “Noah, I've had enough of your apologies. It’s like a toxic, repetitive cycle. You do something bad, apologize, and do it again. Your apologies mean nothing anymore. It’s like a morning routine, like brushing your teeth or washing your face. It keeps going on and on. Nothing’s changed. I’m fucking done with every single one of it.” Noah sighed. He fidgeted probably thinking of another way to convince me otherwise.

“Don Zealot, I don't mind making all four of you happy. Allow me to make amends. I know this is all my fault. I want to show you how sorry Ii am to have caused you such a loss.” Of course, I accept your apology. Hahahahhaha!!! “Well, brothers, you don’t want the lady to feel insecure about how tempting her body is, do you?”