Patrick Star Funny

"I'm gay." My eyes grow so big as I stop breathing, but two seconds later I'm bursting with laughter. "Okay funny," I finally tone down my laugh as I bring myself to look at him again. But he is still staring at me like he had been when he told me that joke. "Wait," uhh, "Really?" He nods, "Really." "You like... guys?" "I fuck guys." Oh wow, you really can't have it all can you. When he checks all the boxes, suddenly there's this big box he doesn't. The most important box, the top on the list. "You're gay or bi?" Because there's a big difference between those two. "I'm gay." "You never fuck a woman?" "I've never fucked a woman." "Then why the hell would you want me to be your sugar baby? To watch you fuck another man's butthole?" He smirks despite my little mockery. "Oh now it's funny?" "It is," he is still smirking, "But no. It's the opposite of what I wanna do." I bring my arms across my chest as I reply in my all-business tone, "Enlighten me." *** 22 year old Estelle is one of the best sugar babies the agency has ever had. She has the whole package, no dick ever gone soft seeing how perfect she is, both her body and personality. But can she sway Owen into the heterosexual group? After being in that homo-pool all this while?

When the Kiss Cam lights up the stadium, Taylor expects to see strangers caught in awkward kisses—not her boyfriend, Dylan, locking lips with another woman. To revenge, Taylor also kisses the handsome stanger sitting next to her when the Kiss Cam swings to her. To her shock, he’s not just any stranger, but Aiden Kincaid—a billionaire, football star, and the soon-to-be ex-husband of the woman Dylan’s been seeing. Taylor thought she’d never cross paths with Aiden again, but fate has other plans. Not only does she become Aiden’s intern sports therapist, but he also offers her a deal: pretend to be his girlfriend.

EXTRACT.. Everything went dark as I felt myself falling, but I knew I was safe. Owen had me.   "I've got you, Luna. I've always got you." Tears streamed down my face as I gazed up at him. "You came for me," "I'll always come for you, Luna, I haven't forgotten my promise to you." "Thank you, Owen, you are my hope!” Darkness swallowed up my world and I was back to my husband Victor, my worst nightmare again. I thought I was from him so I could be with my first lover Owen but I thought wrong. "You brat!! No one ends things with Victor, no one gets out, and I give the final say!!” He pressed my neck with full force and I struggled to breathe. He finally let go and I started coughing, what have I gotten myself into?  "Take this!!” He took some documents and threw them at me.  I went through the document and it was a new marriage contract but the issue was different, it was an indefinite contract. “Sign it at once if you want to see your brother again!“ Am I doing this for real? I guess I have no other choice but to do this, I hope in my next life, I won't end up in this of a marriage. I am so sorry Owen, I have no other choice. I signed the contract and he grabbed my hair saying, "You belong to me for life!! You don't walk out until I am done with you.“ Luna's soul has been trapped in matrimony but do you think her lover, her hope can bring her out? Can love really save the day in the case of Luna? Let’s find out.

The rivalry between werewolves and vampires is as old as time. Now, two destinies are entangled in the mix and they are forced to fight for their love. Can a vampire and a werewolf unite against all odds? Valeria is an outcasted vampire with a deep rooted hatred for werewolves, given that her parents were killed by one when she was only eleven years old. And when a chance for revenge shows itself as Marcello, she ceases it, leading him on to believe that she loved him. But it is only a matter of time before she began to feel things for him that she did not bargain for. Now, will she go on with her plans? Or will she let love tame her? Marcello is the second son of the Crescent pack's Alpha. Life had been pretty smooth for him until Valeria walks into his life one day and awakens a part of his heart that he was not even aware existed. Her presence causes a chain of discoveries and events, most of which drastically turns his life towards a direction that he never planned for. Amidst all the chaos, his love is his only drive to keep going. But there is only so much a person can take. Will love truly conquer? Or will they get eaten up by the troubles of life.

Master Vampire — Lord Elbert, lost the one he loved dearly to a unfortunate circumstance, and a thousand years later when he sees her again he will stop at nothing to protect her. Then a dark mysterious force enters town which threatens to expose the identity of supernatural beings to the world and kill the Masters lover.

A CHRISTMAS STEAMY LOVE STORY... Alone at Christmas time is not an amazing thing! But for newly divorced Starlight Maxwell is the best thing that happened to her lately… Back in Smithville, her hometown, she is trying to move on with her life. At least this was her plan initially… She’s shocked to discover her ex-husband has rented out her childhood home to the person Starlight swore not to see ever again: Elijah Thomas, her high school sweetheart… all grown-up and absolutely gorgeous. Apparently, Starlight’s libido doesn’t care that Elijah shattered her heart eight years ago... With the holidays looming and his presence in her house driving her wild, Starlight strikes a bargain with him: twelve days of no-strings sex. Just so she can get him out of her system. But when the twelve red-hot days of Christmas are over, Starlight isn’t sure she can say goodbye to Elijah…

I am a normal human. When I realized that my werewolf boyfriend lied to me about being my fated mate, I got drunk and had a ONS with my hot new neighbor. It was the best sex ever, but I ran away the next morning because he is also a werewolf, which means he will also meet his REAL fated mate one day. Unexpectedly, I saw my new neighbor on TV, and he was actually a famous hockey star who publicly announced that he will only admit to an official relationship with his fated mate... Host: “Many of your fans want to know if you are still single...” Him: “No, I am not.” Him: “I’m about to start a relationship with my new neighbor...”

Maya Davies is the midfield maestro of Manchester United City's women's team, a rising national star obsessed with proving her team's worth in a world dominated by men's football. Leo Sterling, the dazzling captain of the men's squad, is the club's golden boy, charismatic and undeniably talented, living under the intense spotlight. Their first encounter is a clash of competitive spirits and fierce personalities, fueling a rivalry both on and off the pitch. As training sessions, club events, and a shared passion for the beautiful game force them into constant proximity, the initial sparks of antagonism begin to morph into something undeniably alluring. But in the high-stakes world of professional football, where every move is scrutinized, can two fiercely independent leaders find common ground and a love that defies public expectation, club politics, and their own competitive hearts? Their greatest game might just be the one they play for each other.

Giselle Von Howard was born into unimaginable wealth as the daughter of Lord Benjamin von Howard, the richest man in the city. Determined to forget her own path, she abandoned her privileged life and concealed her true identity to marry Patrick Hilton, the CEO of Hilton Group. But after three years of what she believed was a fairytale marriage, Giselle’s world crumbled when she discovered Patrick’s infidelity with his childhood friend, Becky. Subjected to relentless cruelty from Patrick and his family, Giselle is forced to confront the painful truth about her life and love. In a final act of defiance, she divorces Patrick, leaving behind the glittering facade of the Hilton legacy to reclaim her dignity and rediscover herself. But after they divorced, Patrick discovered that he can't do without Giselle. He comes to understand that he can't get Giselle out of his mind, he's deeply in love with Giselle and he wants her back. Patrick was eager to win Giselle back by all means. Will Giselle ever come back to Patrick again?

Rising star Caspien's sudden disappearance shattered the dreams of his bandmates and left his love, Shaun, heartbroken. Years later, he appeared again but the boy who vanished is now gone. In his place stands a suave, charismatic Casanova, with a smile that can disarm and a reputation that precedes him. Now, he's back, and fate is giving him a third chance - but this time, it's not just about redemption, it's about reclaiming the love he lost, and the heart he broke. Will he win back Shaun, or will the fiery Danica ignite a new passion?