Patrick Star Funny

"Make sure you wipe the counter," I remind him while wearing my panties. "With my tongue?" "Sure, if you wipe again with disinfectant after that." "Awww my little girl all grown up, using the word disinfectant and all. Bet you're getting deflowered any day now!" I smack his head while he laughs, thinking it's funny to keep on teasing me since last week. "I hope his willy isn't as big as mine," okay what now, "so he won't hurt your flower." I wanted to be mad at him, I do, but I laugh instead, stupid Toffer and his little boy talk. *** 30 year old Nina is confused with her hopeless love life. While her best friend pleasures women in the next room, she remains in her space keeping her virginity in-tact, wondering if she’s meant to be with her first love or she needs to move on to find her true soulmate. It takes my first love to end my dating strike. But will it take my first love to end my virginity?

Leia Roschèr had been waiting for this field trip ever since she had heard about it at the beginning of the year at her high school. The sophomore-senior Washington D.C. trip has been the only thing on Leia's mind. The museums, the memorials, the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. She couldn't be more excited about anything else. Leia was known to most of the school in one of the worst ways possible, ever since her reputation had plummeted. The reputation she had gained all thanks to the number one most hated person on her list: Senior boy, Zachary Bentley Turploy. The worst person ever known to exist in her life. Zach, the hockey star team captain and self-made billionaire, was known to always tease Leia; mocking her, pranking her, and intentionally misplacing her things. The whole campus knew of their rivalry. The moment they arrived at their hotel for the trip, Leia realized that what once was her dream has just as easily become her worst nightmare. And Zachary Turploy had just been cast to Star as the main character.

Aaron Morris had it all. Good looks, a beautiful girlfriend, good grades in college. He only had one problem. He was being stalked by a red-haired nightmare otherwise known as Bella Davis! She was the bane of his existence, a thorn on his side who won't leave him alone no matter what. Will he ever get rid of her or will she continue to annoy him with her unrequited love?*This is the spin-off of The Ugly One but can be read as a stand alone novel. However, I recommended you read that one first :)*

Hela Lyon: being an alpha in your pack meant one thing, sacrificing your happiness for the peace of your pack. not that i am an acting alpha yet, my biased father will never allow a woman to rule. I just didn't expect him to decide my life for me. a marriage, an arranged one at that. never in my twenty four years of living would i have imagined getting married to someone who isn’t my mate, talk more of him being the alpha king, the devil himself. The fact that I have no say in this arrangement irks me out and now I have to comply as it is the only way we can assure peace. Eros Rain Vasilios: power doesn't come till you work for it no matter who you are, that is why i worked for mine. Being the king doesn't mean my life was rosy, it was quite the opposite. After the death of my parents, we were left with power hungry relatives. so my brother and i had to fight through it to succeed. These days all I envision myself to be is a selfless ruler who puts his people's needs before his own, the king with his people, for his people and of his people. So I know what I wanted as I took up the marriage partnership as a deal, i was killing two stones with one stone, to some i may be declaring false vows with a female alpha, to me, i was scheming and at the same time declaring my love to my mate(the perfect pawn for my plans). Emotions and words are the center of this story. Read to find the rollercoaster they both find themselves in and also watch out for the blooming love between both siblings.

How far you can go to get your love? Sati, an Indian girl crossover all her way to china to meet her superstar Xiao Wei to make a sweet love story. The most handsome, popular singer and actor Xiao Wei, who have many fans across all over the world and many celebrities & pretty face adoring him to get his attention, will he be able to accept an ordinary girl for his love life/partner ?? Sati will faces many consequences on her way to get her love but there is saying which always made here decision stronger that, 'When you really desire something from the whole heart and soul, all the universe conspires you to achieve it'

She was a receptionist in one of her friend's luxurious hotels when he walked there to destroy the complete hotel. She remembers him as she knows him well since high school but he doesn't remember her because she is no more the fatty girl which she was back in her high school time. To save her friend's hotel she stood before him and he abduct her from the place. He manipulates her to become his girlfriend. Few months after he forced her into contract marriage. Several exposures exposed in her life and love blooms between them.

Cassandra Johnson is Pixie. Pixie is Cassandra Johnson. She's the same girl who's leading two extremely different lives. Nobody would suspect the school's nerd as Pixie. 'Cause Pixie's a street fighter badass and the nerd does not have a single badass bone in her body. The chances of people discovering this peculiar secret is close to none but of course this is where fate inserts the certified new boy into the equation and makes an exception for him. Warning: heavy flow of profanities ahead. - and tears - or so I've heard.

"If only my pain could be seen through my smile, I would have been treated and petted like an egg." **** Have you ever been in a situation where you think that no one notices you? Where you are just your sister's shadow? Where you get to see only everything you love and want but you watch it be snatched away by your twin sister? That is exactly what Ellie Williams was going through. Her sister, Elsa Williams being everyone's favorite made her think she was not enough. From getting a new job to getting admission and meeting her all-time crush, Jayson Smith, who not only showed interest in Elsa during their first meeting but also tried to prove Elsa wrong about her perception of rich kids. Ellie tried her best to make Jayson notice her but then when he sees her, he sees her sister. Heartbroken and dejected, Ellie makes sure not to give up, instead she rose to prove her sister wrong and that too, Shawna, Jayson's fiancee. Read to find out how Ellie fought her way through the envy and pain of the betrayal of being twins.

"I'll do anything!" she pleads, grabbing my hands. "I'll do anything. Just let him go. He made a mistake." "That's not an excuse. It was a costly mistake." "Please. I'll do anything you want. Anything at all." I let the silence hang in the air between us as I think carefully, my eyes drawn to how firm and full her tits are. "Anything, princess?" She lets go of my hands and straightens, raising her chin. I watch as she swallows nervously. "Y-Yes. Anything at all." I raise my fingers to her face, smearing my thumbs with her tears. I trail them down her strong jaw, to her throat, over the small hollow between her collarbones, the skin of her chest, stopping between her tits. I circle the spot quietly while she holds her breath, perhaps in anticipation. "Would you let me fuck you, Titania?" — Feisty, yet innocent Titania Williams is best known for being at the wrong place at the wrong time, and this time she's getting more than she bargained for. When her dear Uncle Patrick betrays one of the most powerful Mafia Lords in New York, Kristoff Stavkros, Titania is caught unexpectedly in the underworld web of crimes and deceit. To save her uncle's life, she makes Kristoff an offer. She'll be his for a month. Thirty days, he owns her body. Stupid, right? But Titania plays by the rules. But how can she come out victorious when Kristoff keeps changing the rules and is hell-bent on making her his forever?

Reign was one the most successful and popular rock artist in the world, she was a star in her own right. She worked ten times harder than her male counterparts. There was a handful of female artists who had achieved the same kind of success she has at such a young age. She was very proud of what she had accomplished in the last three years. It wasn’t easy, she was only fifteen when her manager, Mac, discovered her. She’d been touring and recording nonstop since she started three years ago. Her and her band have been together since the start of her career, they were all around the same age, but she was the youngest of the five of them. When it was decided that they would be taking at least six months off, the twin’s, Jyden and Jazlyn, parents invited Reign and the other two band members to come and spend their vacation with them. They lived in a small rural village on the coast of Scotland. It was secluded enough that security wouldn’t be a problem to arrange. Security was their specialty; they ran one of the most successful security firms in the world, Hunt Security. Six months before her 18th birthday, she became the object of a psycho stalker and her manager hired Hunt Security Company. Little did she know that the brother of her guitarist and drummer was the one who would be in charge of her private security and become more than just her bodyguard.