Ruin My Life Lyrics Novels & Stories

Oh god, he is right. I ruined the only good thing in my life, myself.

My body was wrecked, my throat raw, my soul undone. I had ruined myself.

The anger bubbled up, hot and acidic. “You ruined my life, Devon,” I said loud enough for the stars to hear. “You’re dead, and you’re still ruining it. I’m going to spend my entire life grieving a monster. I’m going to spend fifty years regretting that I ever met you. I regret the hatred. I regret the love. I regret that twisted, sick obsession that made me feel more alive than safety ever could.” I slammed my hand against the concrete. “I hate you! I hate that I left you there!”

Every new message between them felt like a slap across my face. “My sweet Ronan,” I muttered under my breath. It wasn’t his fault. It was that girl’s doing. She had come into our lives and messed everything up. But then I scoffed loudly. No! I wasn’t going to sit here and cry. I was going to crush her. Slowly and beautifully. I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and scrolled through my gallery. The video from the party was still there, the one in which she was grinding so hard against Matthew, his hands pulling her waist hard against his hips like she belonged to him.

The cancer he hid since stage one so he could cash out when I died. I knew exactly who destroyed my life. And exactly how I was going to ruin his. I stood up and walked to the window. The city looked the same as it did back then. But I wasn’t the same. The old Tessa died in that other hospital room. This version of me carried every scar, every memory, every piece of evidence I gathered before death. Julian thought he won. In my first life, he watched me fade and planned his happy ending with Lila. He used my body, my money, my trust. He even made me doubt myself when my memory failed.

The rushing water was already swirling, washing away the stark evidence of his lonely release into the white tiled floor. He gritted his teeth. "Another seed wasted.." he murmured bitterly into the steam. He let his head fall backward against the wall, closing his eyes once more as the downpour of water washed over his face, trying to drown out the unhinged, desperate craving that was slowly eating him alive. ~♠︎~ A few minutes later, the door to the walk-in closet clicked open. Killian stepped out into the dimly lit bedroom, wearing nothing but a pair of low slung, dark gray sweatpants.

The message contained only one sentence: "The person who ruined your life is closer than you think."

kaise kate zindagi maayusi bebasi (how can despondency and helplessness help me live life) raahen sabhi kho gayi (my all ways are lost) roshani de roshani (give me light) main toh rehti hoon teri raahon mein (I am in your paths) bekhabar mujhko dhunde kahaan (unknown of this you search for me) phirta rahoon dar badar (I wander from door to door) milta nahi tera nishaan (yet I don't find any sign of yours) hoke judaa kab main jiya (how can I live separated from you) tu hai kahaan main kahaan (you are there, I am here) teri yaadon mein khoya rehta hoon (I am lost in your memories) mujhko dasti hai tanhaaiyan (my solitude hurts me) ****** SONG SEQUENCE ENDS******

"You don't realize that you are the reason my brother died! I always lived missing him but now I realize that the best thing that could have happened to him is that he died so as not to live the damn life that I am condemned to live.” "Brandon, that's enough!” Mr. Lambert said. "You tried to drug me so that I could have a child with Crystal when you knew perfectly well that the contract stipulated that I would not touch her. I hate you, mom, I hate you! I let you do the security camera thing but I didn't think you were capable of that much.” Enrique and Mr. Lambert's eyes were wider than normal. They couldn't believe what they were hearing there. "I want you to get out, I want you to get out

I raised my hand, and placed my palm tightly over the bridge of my nose, closing my eyes against the sudden glare of the lights. Fuck my life.