Short Dirty Jokes Novels & Stories

i feel stupid making such a dum joke, guys just trying to be nice and i threaten him with marriage maybe my voice didnt portray it as a joke the way i intended. "yeh your probably right, listen dont go anywhere gimme a minute ill call you back". click the phone goes dead. i sat there staring at my phone. maybe he had a friend or a friend of a friend, im confused, i save his contact to my phone and wait. 6 minutes later his name lights up my phone. i answer "hey"

Jokes at my expense but we all laughed,a maid can definitely not be that hot. It was Saturday morning,my door bell rang and I opened my eyes begrudgingly. *who knocks on someone’s door at 6am Damn it??* I stood up and splashed some water on my face,wore a white tee over my grey joggers and jogged down the steps to the front door . I opened the door,to the hottest girl I had ever seen,she wore a low neck shirt,and her bra pushed up her breast so I got a good view of her tits.

The air crackled with their adrenaline and camaraderie, their anticipation for the upcoming game contagious. As I pushed my way through the crowd, one guy jeered, "Hey, look at Shorty over here! What's your sport, little man? Mini-golf?" Laughter erupted around me. Another chimed in, "More like the Elf Olympics!" Their laughter felt like a punch to the gut, but I wasn't surprised. I already knew my height would be another point of contention I'd have to deal with here. Trying to mask my discomfort, I shot back, "You know what they say about us little guys, right? We're like ninjas, here one moment, gone the next." Their laughter only grew louder, echoing loudly in my ears.

A message bubble lit up under his name, cheerful and oblivious. Just another one of his dry, stupid jokes—something about his dinner being so terrible he was convinced the restaurant was trying to assassinate him with undercooked chicken. He'd probably attached one of those ridiculous GIFs he was always finding, something animated and silly that was meant to make me laugh.

"You have no idea–I was just joking around, but those disgusting guys went crazy asking me for your contact." The old me would have already been crying, asking her how she could do this to me, voice breaking. Not this me. My teeth clenched so hard they hurt. My whole body trembled with anger. I snatched the flyer out of her hand and slapped her across the face. Tara screamed, clutching her cheek in disbelief. "You hit me? I treat you like my best friend, and you can't even take a joke anymore?" Best friend? I let out a cold laugh.

Amara and David had been neighbors for two years, the kind of best neighbors who joked about everything and nothing. He’d knock on her door to borrow salt and leave with half her rice. She’d bang on his wall at 2 a.m. yelling “Turn down that Davido!” and he’d reply through the wall with “Come turn it down yourself, madam!” They’d laugh in the hallway the next morning like nothing happened, exchange “good morning” with fake stern faces, then crack up again.

she wailed uncontrollably, frantically clawing at Vanessa's clothes. Everyone in the room was stunned. "What are you doing?" Vanessa screamed as she struggled. "Let go, you insane woman! Investments always come with risk! How is it my fault if you lost money?" "Investments?" I scoffed coldly. I pulled out a thick stack of bank statements from my bag and slammed them onto the dining table. "You call these 'investments', Vanessa?" I glanced at the male colleagues who had been cracking vulgar jokes at the table earlier and said loudly, "Over the past six months, Vanessa has used Mr. Studdard's name to set up three investment group chats and scammed nearly six million dollars from everyone.

This is the most goals joke as long as I've heard. "You're kidding, right? I swear! That's funny. Wow! If you join to stand up comedy, I make sure you can be the winner." "Na," said Mommy quietly. Chiko still showing his smile. "I'm serious and this is not a joke. You can tell the difference too, right?" Shit!

they complained. At this moment, Alex had the craziest and stupid idea ever. she hesitantly has her hand and spoke: What if we just write a kind of friend love letter to the person we get? Like a kind of joke? The teacher loved the Idea. The money grubbers found it a very good idea. The jokers saw a big opportunity and the shy ones were a too-small minority to make a real opposition. She was happy, but just because everyone was happy and it would be very funny.

She hissed, “we need to leave immediately!” “Alright, alright.” I patted her arm. “I’ll just get the eggplants.” I turned and beamed widely at the worried girl. “Have you seen a brinjal this big and shiny?! It’s like—.” “A cock soaked in cum,” someone said. What...? My face feel deadpanned as it swivelled up to voice. An elderly man in Einstein’s age and appearance was bellowing in laughter at his own dirty joke, his round belly shaking uncontrollably.