Stupid Knock Knock Jokes

Being second best is practically in my DNA. My sister got the love, the attention, the spotlight. And now, even her damn fiancé. Technically, Rhys Granger was my fiancé now—billionaire, devastatingly hot, and a walking Wall Street wet dream. My parents shoved me into the engagement after Catherine disappeared, and honestly? I didn’t mind. I’d crushed on Rhys for years. This was my chance, right? My turn to be the chosen one? Wrong. One night, he slapped me. Over a mug. A stupid, chipped, ugly mug my sister gave him years ago. That’s when it hit me—he didn’t love me. He didn’t even see me. Obviously, I needed alcohol. A lot of alcohol. Enter him. Tall, dangerous, unfairly hot. The kind of man who makes you want to sin just by existing. It was reckless. It was stupid. It was completely ill-advised. But it was also: Best. Sex. Of. My. Life. And, as it turned out, the best decision I’d ever made. Because my one-night stand isn’t just some random guy. He’s richer than Rhys, more powerful than my entire family, and definitely more dangerous than I should be playing with. And now, he’s not letting me go.

Jessiah is a make-up artist aspiring to break into the modeling and beauty industry. She moves to LA when she lands a job at one of the biggest production companies in Hollywood. On her first week on the job, she meets Jenson Ross, a big-deal actor with a murky past and a dark secret only a privileged few know about. × Genres: Romance, Werewolf, Crime EXCERPT [BOOK I of CALI ALPHAS ] _ _ _ "Dollface," he murmured with a little smirk. He snickered and caressed the back of her head, pulling her closer to his chest. "You're like an antidepressant, in human form." Her breath caught.  Her heart sped up when his hug tightened. His warm face pressed onto her neck, his strong hands lightly squeezing her hips. Moments like this only worsened her attraction to him.  The flirty jokes, the easy conversations, the small smiles, his furtive glances, and his unusually sweet gestures lately... She was in deep trouble. Was he kissing her neck?  Shit. He was no longer thinking straight.  About this. About her. About the consequences. He drew her closer when she tried to pull away. As if he didn't want her out of his sight. While his beard scraped her skin, his thighs touched hers. Her throat ached as he stared into her eyes. "Dammit," he sighed, his thumb tracing the curve of her neck, his touch both gentle and eager.  "Why are you so f-cking beautiful?"  "Joss, I need to g—" "Why now?" he murmured, stroking her cheek. He wasn't acting drunk or playing with her.  Not like this. He wouldn't. Not with her real feelings barely held together by some unspoken truths. Otherwise he wouldn't dare let it get this far.  But why wouldn't he let go? "Just stay. Please. Stay here with me." _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Marry me” Steven replied immediately. Yan’s eyes widened and she scoffed, rolling her eyes. “ Is this guy serious or what? What does he take me for, a slave?” She thought sending daggers at him. “ I know I accept any type of job but I won’t just marry whomever I come across. Am not stupid” Yan snapped. “ You have only 2 choice, first, marry me” Steven said. “ And the second?” Yan asked. “ Marry me” Steven replied making Yan scoff. “ And what’s the difference in the two choices?” Yan asked. “The difference is that there are no difference” Steven replied. Steven Zhichoa Liu popularly know as Mr Liu, I'd the CEO of Liu industry, the top best cartoonist industry in China. Everyone referred him as the Cold, Bossy, Arrogant and domineering CEO who likes being alone. He crosses part with Yan Yunqi, a college student who is also a cartoonist. Meeting each other for the first time, both of them are unhappy to see each other. But what happens when both of them got tied up in a contractual marriage? Will they be able to let go of their difference and let love blossom in their hearts? You won't wanna miss out!

Riley’s mom is about to marry the Lycan King, which means Riley is now the stepsister of the most famous fuckboy Ezra Ravenshire. She knows life is about to get really rough because Ezra absolutely despises his father’s new wife and has sworn to ruin Riley’s life in every way possible. At school, she’s bullied, humiliated, and isolated—because under Ezra’s orders, the entire academy sees her as a walking target. She keeps telling herself she just needs to survive one year. One year, and she’ll be out of here for good. But what if they suddenly find out they’re mates? Would that matebond change everything between them—or just give Ezra a new way to control and toy with her? And Riley has a secret of her own. One that might just be the key to becoming the most powerful healer the pack has ever seen—and escaping Ezra once and for all. *** His hand slid from my neck down to my chest. I bit my lip to stop a moan, and forced myself not to look into his eyes. But he leaned in close, his voice low and rough against my ears— “Think you can escape me, my stupid little sis? No, Never…Not until I say so.”

Everyone in the social circle of Kingsford said I was nothing more than a lapdog raised by Charles Mankin. I was always at his beck and call. I did every filthy, ludicrous thing for him under the sun. When he street raced, I rode shotgun. When he drank himself senseless, I made him hangover soup. When he chased girls, I prepared protection for them. Over time, everyone knew: Charles had a dog who never ran, never bit back, no matter how hard he kicked. They all said I must be madly in love with him. Even Charles started to believe it. So he pushed further, more freely, more cruelly, crossing lines as if they never existed. Then came my twenty-fifth birthday. He, in a rare stroke of mercy, said he'd celebrate it with me. But instead, what he got was the news that I was leaving the country. He went berserk, charging through the airport like a man possessed. I peeled his fingers off my wrist one by one, smiling like I'd never been happier. "Don't be stupid," I told him, still smiling. "That was never love." That night, Charles smashed apart his family home like a rabid dog.

“You can call me when you’re lonely. I’ll be your temporary fix.” Those were the words that he said to me and it was plain simple, he wanted nothing but sex and I wanted nothing more than too. I was the kind of girl who was too scared of falling in love again because I feel like there is something more in life than being mournful over a guy who never actually gave a hell. I deserve something more than pain and misery over a stupid heartbreak. Since then, I got too scared of commitment that I no longer wanted to be in one. I wanted fun and I wanted to feel like I am alive again. He was the kind of guy who was too busy for permanent relationships. The superstar that all women wanted to bang with. The kind of guy who would have any girls kneel down in front of him because well, he is that kind of guy. He was a guy with a hectic schedule, sold out world tours, drinking champagne in private jets, holding a mic in one hand and conquering all over the world on the other. Maybe I needed someone to show me how to live again and he needed someone to show him how to love.

Her heart began to beat heavily. She was fascinated by the man. Awareness flooded through her, as did a sudden need to brush her hair. Dammit, why had she put on this stupid bum short and singlet today. She wondered what he would look like with that shirt off. She swallowed and tried to look away. Fantasies like that would get her nowhere. "Hi" he said. And for a few seconds Emma didn't realize he was speaking to her. She blushed when she lifted an eye brow questioningly. "Oh hello" "Urmm...name's Daniel. Nice to meet you" "it's nice to meet you too.. I'm Emma" -------------------------------- Emma Green has totally given up on relationships and happy ever after. Not because she doesn't think it's amazing to have someone, mind you, but because she simply doesn't believe in love. She's been there and done that, and she's not doing it again. But when she meets Daniel Rohan, she starts to think that maybe, just maybe falling in love again might not be all that bad.... -------------------------------- Take control.. Feel the rush... Explore your fantasies Step into stories of provocative romance where sexual fantasies come true. Let your inhibitions run wild.

BOOK 1&2- Completed One night, one life-changing decision, and so they say, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Yet it was nothing but a stupid mistake. She awakens in an unknown suite, naked with a hot stranger in bed with a wedding ring on her fingers. But being confused was nothing compared to the fact that he was Shawn Richmond, the famous CEO-billionaire playboy. To make matters worse, he left her gaping and still naked. However, she didn't have a plan to see him, but fate wasn't done with her yet. In London, she saw him in the bar after getting herself drunk when she discovered her fiance was cheating on her and took all their life savings. Then, with sheer luck, Mr. Richmond offered her a job as her secretary in exchange for keeping their accidental marriage secret. How hard could it be? But being married to his boss wasn't always rainbows and sunshine; it was full of tears, betrayals, heartache, and when her life shifted from boring to running for her life, plus some Russian mobs, treasure hunters, and religious zealots after them for the rumored treasure left by Shawn's grandfather, their lives spiraled into a mess. Could his love save her? Or broke her even more?  BOOK 2- The Accidental Past (Completed)

There's a famous catchphrase since time immemorial: The more you hate, the more you love. Alam ni Dennis na iba siya kompara sa ibang mga lalaki. Imbes na sa babae, sa lalaki siya nakakaramdam ng kakaiba. At may lihim siyang pagtingin sa isa sa mga barkada niya, kay Ervin. Subalit hindi niya ito sinasabi kahit kanino man dahil alam niyang ang taong gusto niya'y may iba ng mahal. Kaya mas lalo siyang determinado na itago sa binata ang kakaibang nararamdaman niya rito. Sa hindi inaasahan, may nakaalam ng kanyang sikreto sa hindi niya malamang dahilan. Raymond, the man who hates his guts. All this man do is to pick on his faults that sometimes, he wants to punch his stupid face. Well, the feeling is mutual. He equally hates the other. But then, Raymond's attitude turned 180°. Kung dati, nararamdaman niya ang inis nito sa kanya, ngayon, si Dennis na mismo ang nagugulat na to the rescue si Raymond tuwing may problema siya. Akala niya ba ayaw nito sa kanya? Wait, this is not a story about love. Maybe?

Austin is the Beta of a thriving pack currently in a growth phase. He is about to turn 26 years old and still hasn't found his second chance mate so he will soon start looking for a love match. After being crushed on his 18th birthday by the rejection of his first mate he has continued to save himself in hopes that he will be one of the lucky few to get a second chance. Andrew is lower then an Omega. He is the lowest ranking wolf in a pack that they don't even have a term for them. All pack members are important but as his rank never moves up he never expected to have a mate nor aim for anything more then what he was. He knew young he was gay and after his stupid cousin rejected Beta Austin as his mate 8 years ago, killing Xavier instantly, his parents aren't as homophobic but he can't wait to know for sure he doesn't have a mate so he can get away from here. He just wants to find a nice man to settle down with away from his crazy family and pretend he isn't even a werewolf. No wolf would want a useless runt like him anyways.