Stupidly Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

Getting married should be one of the wishes humans tend to make, especially to be with the one they love, right? But what happens when a human wishes for nothing in his or her life, but wealth, and nothing else, not even happiness? Meet Emma Maxwell, a twenty five years old wealthy lady, who had been broken many times, because of love, and for that, she vowed to never fall in love again. Like every other person, Emma had always wished to know the feelings of love, to give and to get it in return, but relationship never seemed to be her thing, as she always ended up being the victim of one sided love. After trying series of relationship, without any, working out for her, she decided to give up on love, and started sleeping around with men. As she always said to any man that approaches her for love "that shit ain't for me, I just wanna get laid, and we go our separate ways. But what happens, when her parents, especially her mom, desperately wants her to get married, and not just getting married, but to her friend's son? Do you think she'll agree to it?....

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.

Christmas is the most magical time of the year, right? That may be true for most people but not Julia. Julia has never had an easy life, she has been homeless for as long as she can remember and now she is raising a three-year-old the same way. She wants more for them both but she has no way of changing things, besides she's soon going to have to leave the only place that she's ever called home to keep them both safe. If anyone finds out her secret her world will be blown apart and that's something that she can't allow to happen. Riley has had the best life imaginable. He has loving parents, grandparents and his best friend Joshua has been by his side since he was a young child. He also runs several successful businesses and has everything he wants in life except for one thing... love. He wants someone to love, to cherish but his past still has a tight grip on him and holds a secret that not even he knows about. What will happen when both worlds collide? Can Julia get the Christmas that she has always dreamed of for her and her little girl? Can Riley learn to forget his past so that he can move forward and when Juila's secret is revealed and blows both of their worlds apart, will it bring them together or tear them even further apart and destroy Julia's world, just like she has always feared it would?

Rhoda Schurz is known for being a born-again Christian missionary and she falls in love with Rudolf Wagner, who is a resigned U.S Army officer. They encounter a tragic accident and that gives him pain. Their marriage presents enumerable conflicts. Rhoda overcomes all in the eyes of faith in Jesus Christ. Rudolf is convinced that JESUS healed him and he also follows Christ's teaching with Rhoda, whom he loves.

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Belle Stefano, a transmigrator who comes from another world. She woke up one day on a different body. She lives her life leisurely not until she finds out that she’s inside the comic that she’s read and that she is the antagonist who will meet her end tragically by the male lead. Luke Andres Hendrick is cold and heartless. He doesn’t care about the people around him except when she finds Georjia Norjia and falls in love with her at first sight. Belle did her best to not get in the way of the male and female lead of the comic book but she slowly falls in love with the male lead. Will she confess her love for him or she will run away without telling the male lead how she feels?

They say memories stored in our brain could be sometimes forgotten, but then the heart does not forget. Because our heart always remember, the heart recognizes our beloved when our brain couldn't. Years after they lost contact with each other, Zhanaia encountered Dion again on the same place where they met. And funny how destiny works, they met again just like how they first met, accidentally bumping with each other. Zhanaia's heart was filled with joy, she couldn't contain her happiness and jumped to hug Dion, not wanting to let him go again. But all the hope in her shattered when Dion pulled away from her embrace and asked her, "I'm sorry, miss, but... who are you?"

This is the tale of how the sexist remark, "Men are scum," was delivered to me on a scalding plate! Guess what? It all started with a birthday surprise party for my boss's fiance, but I was slapped with horror when I saw my boyfriend of two years being kissed by my boss with an engagement ring around both their fingers. Turned out I had been the side chick for two bloody years! Funny enough, I wasn't served a heart break alone, my boss had also been toying with the emotions of Cole McPherson, and together we swore to take revenge. Would I still scream, "Men are slime!" at the conclusion, or will my beliefs alter in the process of seeking revenge alongside Cole?

When a young girl moves to a new town with her Uncle and cousins, she has to complete her senior year at a new school. Her love for tattoos, fighting, fast cars and family is what keeps her going. She tries to ignore everyone to make it through her last year but that doesn't last when she catches the eyes of 3 brothers. The Brothers run the school and town they live in. All 3 are drop dead gorgeous and used to everyone sucking up to them. They have girls all over them every week but none have committed. Their love for all things fast, cars, women and motorcycles, are the only thing on their minds. That is until a new girl shows up and doesn't treat them like everyone else. Her smart mouth, tattoos and attitude intrigue the brothers and they can't wait to have her. Will she give into their advances? Will the brothers give up their fast ways?? Just have to wait and see...... **THIS STORY HAS A LOT OF GRAPHIC SEX SCENES AND SEXUAL SITUATIONS. DO NOT READ IF UNDER 18 OR IF YOU AREN'T INTO THIS TYPE OF BOOK**

((A/N)) If you haven't read "Lycan King" you should definitely read it for a better understanding of "Lycan Blood." or you can just read this book and go back and read "Lycan King" your choice.****************I follow closely behind Lucious through the dark forest, looking at his tensed back. "I was only helping. I know you're angry Lucious, but you can't go around doing whatever you want anymore. My father has laws in place for these types of things." If Lucious would've wiped that pack out, he would've had to answer to father for his crimes.Lucious turn around glaring at me. "Don't tell me what I can and cannot do! I don't give a fuck about your father nor his laws! He's not my fucking king!" He spits the words at me, before turning walking away.I let out a sigh, looking at his back as he disappears through the thick trees of the forest. He may not accept father as his king, but that doesn't mean father won't punish him for the laws he breaks.************************************** After all the killing and fighting, Lisa just wants for things to go back to the way they once were, but the peacefulness of her old life back in the human world is long gone. Lisa is now shoved into the world that she was always meant to be a part of. She's no longer in the human world, living by the human ways and laws. Here its killed or be killed. While Lisa fight for her respect amongst the wolves, Lucious is planning to get revenge for the death of his father and friends.