tagalog funny quotes

Akihiro Tetsuya is a man with uncontrollable sex anxiety. Kaya naman hindi na niya na mabilang kung ilang babae na ba ang natikman ng kanyang alagang si Polaris. Well, hindi naman mahalaga sa kan'ya ang bagay na iyon. The important thing is, nairaraos niya ang sarili at napupunan ang kanyang sex craving. Until one time in his mission, nakilala niya si Kiah, ang babae na sinagip niya sa The Hidden Paradise. Isang club kung saan pawang mga high-paid prostitutes ang nagbibigay ng panandaliang aliw sa mga kalalakihan. Dahil sa awa at simpatya sa dalagang probinsyana, ay inalok niya itong tumira sa kan'ya at mamasukan bilang kasambahay. Pero sino ang niloloko niya? Alam niyang kaya niya inalok ang babae dahil attracted siya sa magandang katawan at perpektong dibdib nito. Magagawa pa ba niyang sawayin si Polaris gayong minu-minuto ay natutukso siya sa very innocent, charming, at "braless" na si Kiah?

Rules. Kills. Ranks. Masks. Betrayals. Liars. Secrets. Haxielle Devi Grim, the secret heir of the biggest Mafia Organization- Grim Line Corporation. A typical selfish brat, cold, pyscho and troublemaker was- once again expelled because of her mistake. Her father Hades Grim sent her to their own school that has been kept as a secret to her for many years.She has one mission. Know the hidden secrets of her family and her own.Magagawa niya bang malaman lahat ng sikreto or everything will turn into dust? Welcome to Elyxir Academy!Would you like to kill?

“Even if the last droplets fall, my love for you will never fall out” ~Carlos Drake Santillan Campus' Series number 1

Mayaman. Maganda. Tinitingala ng lahat. Iyan ang kadalasan na maririnig sa tuwing binabanggit ang pangalan ng sikat na artistang si Rasheeqa Laurent. Perpekto na ang buhay niya kung tutuusin at hindi maipagkakailang hinahangaan siya ng karamihan dahil sa taglay niyang husay sa pag-arte. Sa kabila ng mala-perpekto niyang buhay, ano ang mangyayari kapag malaman ng publiko na may sekreto siyang anak? Paano niya mapapanatili ang kanyang reputasyon at kredibilidad gayong hindi niya kontrolado ang sasabihin ng iba? At higit sa lahat, paano niya ipapaliwanag sa ama ng kanyang anak na siya ang ama nito gayong simula't sapol, ang lalaki na mismo ang nagputol sa ugnayang meron sila?

Some people say, high school life is great but for Joycelyn Lopez it was a misery. A young girl, from Pangasinan Philippines who experienced bullying. For her, school is hell because of people bullying her looks and skin ever since elementary, that is why she is full of insecurities in herself... but not until she met Dave, a transferee guy who came from the United States of America A well-mannered, a son of the City Mayor, living in upper-class life and a boy who fall stupidly in love in her. Dave didn’t know he would fall in love crazy to the girl, ever since he was in America, girls are going crazy over him. But when he went to the Philippines, the tables have turned. Of course, Dave shoots her shot to Joy. They became together because they think they would find peace with each other; never thought they will make misery for themselves.

Growing up, Cindy Anne Lopez had it all. Ang kayamanan, prestihiyosong paaralan, mapagmahal at proteksyon ng mga magulang. Ngunit nagbago ang lahat nang umibig siya. Sa edad na 16, nakilala niya si Leo Montes. Ang anak ng karibal ng kanyang tatay sa negosyo.She loved him. She was crazy in love.Find out how she will get behind that mask...

A story about a woman behind the mask who agreed to become a private and exclusive prostitute of a man named Cameron Ferrell. The dangerous, ruthless, and heartless mafia lord everyone tries to avoid. What will happen when a sudden turn out of event occur and she'll end up bearing his child which wasn't part of their rule? Will the mask of the beautiful maiden fall off?

Penelope Brielle Acosta is a bride-to-be however she had a one night stand with a man who isn't her future husband-to-be.Natagpuan niya ang sarili na walang saplot nang umagang magising at nang malingunan sa tabi niya ang lalaking inakalang pakakasalan ay ganoon na lamang ang gulat niya ng hindi iyon ang lalaking dapat niyang pangakuan ng kanyang vows. She shared a drunken night to a stranger!She was fully convinced that she was with her man last night. What happened to her bachelorette party and how did she end up with a stranger in her bed? And why did she end up marrying that stranger who took her that night?

Bexan Ivanov witnesses a surprise terror attack during his 13th birthday and loses his father in the middle of the terror attack. A terrorist attempts to kill Bexan but fails because a heroic girl with a sniper saves him. Later Bexan knew, the heroic girl who saved him is actually an agent who works in a hidden agency, the unheard Onic Agency! Where undercover agents save the world in secret!Bexan felt immensely grateful towards the heroic girl who saved him from the brutal terrorist. After that, he decided to become an agent. Bexan was indebted to Onic so he pledged to give his full service to the said agency. Within 11 years, Bexan trained his ass off to become District 10's Supreme Commander and in order to do that, he has to get a hold of one of the biggest cases in Onic and that is terminating The Camorra Mafia Group.Bexan won't be handling this big time case alone. He will be assigned with a job partner, but wait a minute! Not just any job partner! Bexan becomes partners with a female agent who's a complete sloth. Lilith Divina helps Bexan with his first assignment in terminating the Camorra Mafia group. Bexan finds Lilith uncooperative with a drunken man's soul. Will their first assignment turn into a success? Or will it turn into a complete catastrophe?

Si Samantha ay isang napakaganda at inosenteng babae, na may matagal nang kasintahan, na si Liam. Gayunpaman, biglang dinurog ni Liam ang kanyang puso, na naging dahilan upang gumuho at miserable ang kanyang mundo. Wala siyang kahit na anumang ideya kung bakit ginawa ito ni Liam sa kanya. Isang kasintahan na minsang nangako sa kanya at napalitan ng walang pakialam at walang puso. Ngunit nang magkrus muli ang kanilang landas, naadik na siya sa kanya. Bumaliktad ang mundo ng dalawa. Naging sobrang possessive niya sa kanya, na kahit isang kaibigan ni samantha na tumingin sa kanya na parang bihirang brilyante, magseselos siya. To the point na gusto na niyang ilibing lahat ng lalaking sumusulyap lang kay samantha. **** "Huwag kang magkakamali, kung ano ang akin ay akin lamang. Kaya kong gawin kahit anong gusto ko. Kung sino man ang gustong magnakaw sa aking pinakamamahal na babae ay dadaan sa galit na aking dadalhin." Galit niyang sabi.