terrible puns

"All because you are incredibly attractive doesn't give you the right to be fucking pompous and arrogant." Red slapped her hand over her mouth but it was too late, the words were out. "You find me attractive Red." He stepped closer to her, real close. His mother and friend still watching them. "I..d..on't." She stammered. Daniel took her chin in his hand and lifted her face, "Don't even think of falling for me or getting attracted." His voice was harsh, "I am not your type and would never look your way." The slap that landed on his face wasn't expected. _______ She was the girl without a surname, a terrible con artist and also the infamous petty thief on New York streets. 21 year old Red decided to find a Job and change to be a better person, the moment she walked through those big wooden doors her life changed drastically plus the bonus of having the perfect boyfriend, Capri lorenzo. He was New York's most eligible bachelor with riches and looks to die for. Daniel Hart was a cold hearted boss who worked endlessly to keep up his perfect image. That Monday morning when she walked into his office looking like a tornado, he hated her. he knew he had to be rid of her before she ruined his life. They hated each other and all it took for their lives to change was one heartbreak, a kiss and a steamy night.

The day before her wedding, Nora Gibson discovered that her fiancé had impregnated her sister, causing her immense pain. To escape from her harsh reality, Nora ended up at a club where she met Merrick Wilkinson, a wealthy and strikingly handsome multi-billionaire with a terrible personality. Despite his flaws, they had a one-night stand that created a bond between them that would last a lifetime.

Tyler and Dakota have been best friends since either can remember, even with a 2 year gap in their age. But what happens when Ty leaves and joins the military, and leaves Kota behind? Something he promised he would never do? Will it wreck their friendship for good, will they be able to repair it? When Ty comes back, Kota is in a terrible situation. Will Ty be able to protect her? © 2013 Kenzie Elaine (Wattys13)

“You called me a whore for what we did that day! And that is how you treated me,” Lara condemned starkly, sticking to her point. “You see, I was only twenty-three and I had absolutely no experience with a man like you, Christophe. You are the one who took advantage…” “I wanted you like crazy, Lara!” The assurance was harsh, immovable, no admission of fault. Her mouth twisted painfully. Christophe Moreau appeared in Lara’s life in the most vulnerable moment possible. He was powerful, strong, stunning… way too overwhelming for such a young girl like herself. So, Lara got scared and pushed away his indecent proposal, choosing a comfortable life next to Randall Anderson, her best friend. Three years had passed since her ‘no’ to Christophe. Lara Anderson is now a widow and she’s facing a terrible drama: her father is accused of stealing money from the company he’s working for. Lara knows she can’t overcome this alone… She needs Christophe’s help to avoid her father being incarcerated. Christophe is suggesting a deal that will give him what he always wanted: Lara’s body. She must have been his for three months! But Lara can't give in to Christophe's demands. To let him possess her body and soul will be to give him the ultimate revenge… because he will discover that after three years of marriage, she is still… untouched!

Pandora thought she would have a white picket fence and 2.5 kids with her highschool sweetheart. That was until he stood her up on their date and she caught him cheating. Newly divorced Pandora goes to Vegas and lets her hair down. A wild night with a stranger results in her waking up with a terrible hangover. Moreover, she couldn’t remember his name or what he looked like! Life after that should have been boring—apart from fighting off her ex-husband, and putting the mistress in her place. Who could have known that one night of passion would lead to unexpected and lifelong consequences. Now, Pandora needed to search for the baby of her father. But what is she to do when she is attracted to her doctor? Will she forget about the mystery man who made her laugh or will she start anew with this handsome and polite doctor? Will the demons of her past allow her a happily ever after?

Six years after she left him waiting at the altar, Charles Anthony Oxford finally met Isabella Shade. And six years proved to be a long time as Isabella was already married and Charles who had grown his wealth, well, he was in search for a wife for certain reasons. On learning that his runaway bride’s company was in financial crisis because of her good for nothing husband’s gambling problems amongst other reasons, Charles saw an opportunity. Two, actually. Not only would he be getting a wife, he would be able to exact revenge on the woman who had left him heartbroken, in his own way. All he had to do was remind her of the terrible thing she had done, torture her a bit with a sexual toss here and there, remind her of her present status and all she needed to do was agree to his terms and become his wife… But with a woman like Isabella, it just wasn’t going to be so easy… [Contains mature scenes]

"Is it true? Did you impregnate my sister?" I asked him, tears burning my eyes. "Is it true that you slept with your secretary?" I continued to question his loyalty. He made me believe he was in love with me, only to take my virginity and break me as nobody had ever. "It is true," he shrugged, "I am a young mayor of this town. I have a lot of options, what made you think you were special?" he smirked, his eyes shining as he watched me suffer. "Don't even think about leaving this town," just when he saw me step back, he ordered, "You will stay here and be my little pet, Phoenix. You will stay in this town and be my----- sex toy!" that was it, the title he gave to our relationship. ...... A Nineteen-year-old Pheonix arrives in a town full of mysteries, crazy rules, and sex addicts. What was supposed to be her escape from the terrible past ends up becoming a nightmare for her when she catches the eyes of the Young Mayor of the town, who is known for having sex addictions. Will Pheonix become one of his addictions or will it be her love that he will become addict to?

The ICS breeds only the finest and the fittest, but, there are terrible secrets eating through this agency's foundation like termites. It seems...everyone here carries a past—past' so dark they're willing to do anything to keep it buried. ••• When Lade Adenuga gets handpicked by the ICS, it changes his life in ways he couldn't have imagined. He spends years living this new life, and when things start to fall apart quickly, his only chance lies at the heartland of a game reserve. With his past on a billboard and his future on a tombstone, it's a vicious cycle of survival, and Lade Adenuga is losing. (Rewritten version available soon)

"Is it really so unbelievable that I would kiss you? That I want you?" he asks, the softness of his tone gliding its way across my skin. "Because I plan to do it over and over again." *** While working her job at an Inn, Akara is faced with a mysterious stranger, who blows in with the wind, followed by the terrible rumours that surrounds his name. A Hunter. A man who kills, and leaves no trace. Needing her invaluable knowledge, the Hunter kidnaps Akara, however, is intercepted on his journey, by an unstoppable force. A King. Instead of throwing Akara into a prison, the King makes a deal. She has freedom within his magnificent palace in return for her company. However, making a deal with a powerful man sinks her deep into his world, and the danger is possesses. And all the while, she must battle her feelings for the wrong man, and decide her fate.

"You're a dangerous woman, Elena," He reached, turning on the shower beside her head. "I think your demons are making you see things wrong, Mr. Rossi," she murmured through the water spilling down her head. He laughed, "They are right; you're my trigger," his nose buried into the crook of her neck, he muttered, sending shivers down her spine. "And too bad a lot of people cross you..." ***** Her life came crashing down when she signed a contract marriage with the calm President Nikolai Rossi, who only had eyes on one woman who wasn't her. To make matters worse, she couldn't help but fall in love with him and his son, knowing he'd never reciprocate. After a terrible divorce, three years later, Elena Vero is a mother of one. She now has to return to Italy for business, unfortunately falling into the waiting palms of her ex-husband, who surprisingly wants her back. But being his wife has never been a bed of roses and never will it be, especially when she finds out he isn't all that he seems.