Yo Mama So Fat Jokes

Beta Max and I were at the Civil Affairs Bureau, ready to register our marriage. We were just waiting to take the final photo when he got a phone call and left. He abandoned me right there at the marriage registration office, leaving me stuck in an impossible situation. I called him—no answer. I messaged him—no reply. In the end, I had no choice but to call his childhood sweetheart’s number. Beta Max answered. “Louis, can you stop being so annoying? Grace twisted her ankle—I need to take care of her today. Stop calling and waking her up. We’ll reschedule the registration.” I bit my lip and murmured into the phone, “This makes it the seventh time we’ve rescheduled.” “So what? The Civil Affairs Bureau isn’t going anywhere—it’s not like it’s going to disappear!” My face was blank, but it felt like my heart was being carved open. A staff member looked at me with pity and asked, “Alpha Louis, are we still doing this?” I gave a small nod. “Yes. Let’s go through with it.”

Blurb Isabella Dante lost her perfect life the night she slept with a stranger and got pregnant. Her Father disowns her, and she leaves La Nostra Terra. Five years later, she returns for a business contract, and she's with the most beautiful five-year-old daughter, Sofia. Rich and a successful single mother, Isabella is living a life of luxury again. They run into a stranger, and Sofia strongly believes he's her father, leaving Isabella shocked and confused. "He's not your father, baby." Isabella tries to convince her. "But he is, Mummy. Look, we both have the same eyes." Sofia turns to the stranger and asks. "What's your name, handsome mister?" "Enzo. Enzo Ferrari." Isabella freezes. It can't be. She tries to pull her daughter away from the clutches of the most dangerous man on the planet—the capo dei capi of the Italian 'Fratelli' Mafia family. "Stay away from him." Isabella cautions. "But I can't. He's my Daddy!" "No, baby. He's not. He's a dangerous man. And he's going to hurt us if we don't stay away from him…."

Four years after Selene's humiliating rejection from being Luna.Selene is brought back to the famous land of Ironclaw pack once again. She takes no time in reintroducing herself as the new sensual sensation she is,a wealthy fiery temptress with a cunning mind. Selene says she returns for her job alone but deep down in her veins,she knows the name of what brought her back.The self destructive need to inflict as much pain as she can on him and everyone who wrongfully judged her.The raging storm in her was revenge fueled by hate But there is a thin line between love and hate and with every glance,glare,and the deja vus of heated touch,it becomes painfully clear to Selene that the line was slowly vanishing. But that is Alpha Ares’ plan all along,he desperately wants to win his cold luna back. Even at the cost of things he once held dear;his pack,his family and something he never thought could be taken from him…his self-control.

The love story of Leonardo Davidson, a handsome but arrogant CEO who loves to hurt women with Zivanna Mariah Electra, a beautiful and kind woman. When Zivanna had to choose between Leonardo, the man she loved, or Alfredo, her brother. Leonardo, who always cared for her, and Alfredo, who always wiped his tears and gave her a room named family as a place to live all the time and a place to return to when she got lost. Between love and family, Zivanna is confused about making choices. The strength of Leonardo's love, a man who never gave up and really believed in the magic of love, finally won Alfredo's blessing, who was very much against the relationship between Leonardo and his sister. Marriage is not a game. Marriage is about a feeling and about a commitment that must always be maintained to the end. Leonardo Davidson failed to maintain his commitment. He destroyed his own marriage with betrayal. What is the fate of Zivanna who is pregnant? Will Leonardo get a second chance? Can Leonardo win back Alfredo's blessing? A novel that evokes feelings, about family, love and trust.

A medical report shows me my husband's true colors. I've been diagnosed with late-stage stomach cancer. Yet, my husband gives our life savings to someone else. I lunge at him to take my anger out on him, but he shoves me to the floor. "Lillian needs the money to open up a shop, you madwoman! So what if I've given her the money? "You have late-stage stomach cancer, so it's the end of the line for you! Why are you trying to compete with someone who has a long life ahead when you already have one foot in the grave? You can't expect Mom and I to lose everything because of you, right?" I sit dazedly on the floor. I've never found him more unfamiliar. After that, I sneak all my wedding gifts out, wanting to sell them for money. However, I'm told they're all fakes. My husband sneers. "I'm glad I had the foresight to switch them out for the real deal. You would've taken all the money if not for that!" Later, the hospital called to say there was an issue with their system. The names on the medical reports were wrongly indicated. I ask my husband, "Why are you competing with someone who has a long life ahead when you already have one foot in the grave?"

Sa mismong kaarawan ni Seth, ang kaniyang fiancé, nakipaghiwalay si Sabrina dahil sa harap-harapang pakikipaglandian nito sa kababatang si Pia. Sa sobrang sama ng loob at nasaktan, isinuko ni Sabrina ang pagkababae kay Adrian, ang matalik na kaibigan ni Seth. Hindi niya pinagsisihang isinuko niya sarili kay Adrian dahil isa ito sa taong makakatulong sa kanya para gumaling ang amang may malubhang karamdaman . Hanggang saan hahantong ang mga plano ni Sabrina? Magtatagumpay kaya siya o magsisi sa huli?

“Mian Huda, meeting you is the best thing that has ever happened to me," he paused then continued, "Marry me and I will help you take revenge on everyone that wronged you,'' Nathan Barak spoke. Is it worth it to marry a man who once betrayed her, and made her lose her pregnancy? Did the man really betray her or was it just a misunderstanding from the very beginning? If she agrees to marry him, will love blossom between them again? Will they be able to fight against the forces that try to break them apart? This book portrays betrayal, hate, and revenge and in the midst of all these, truth and mysteries are uncovered.

On the night of our wedding, my husband told me he wanted to have a child with his teacher’s daughter. When I confronted him, he turned it back on me. “Teacher is seriously ill, and her only wish is to see three generations under one roof. My junior and I are just doing IVF. It’s not like anything is actually happening between us!” “Besides, you were also her student. How could you refuse to help fulfill her last wish?” However, the next day, when I went to visit our teacher with a fruit basket, I saw my husband and his junior locked in an embrace at the corner of the hallway. The moment was like a bolt of lightning. I turned and walked away. The following day, my husband sent me a text: [I’m going with her for the IVF. Let’s postpone the family gathering for a few days.] I did not reply. Instead, I went back to my hometown alone, visiting each of my relatives to personally apologize. Then, I went to a lawyer. “I’d like to sue my husband for bigamy.”

After my parents died in a car crash, my cousin stole the compensation money and moved overseas to start a business. My aunt begged me on her knees not to call the police. Then, she locked me in a dark basement for three months. I was close to breaking down and ending my life when Julien Lawson, the neighbor’s son, broke down the basement door and saved me. “Joyce, what they did is unforgivable! They stole the compensation money for your parents’ deaths. You were going to use it to open your own studio! “Marry me. I’ll protect you.” He was the only person who cared about me after my parents died. I was so grateful that I married him and had his child. I worked three jobs during the day to help support the orphanage that Julien ran. At night, I took care of our child and created design sketches. But no matter how hard I tried, none of my work was ever accepted. Even though Julien told me to keep at it, I felt discouraged and thought of giving up on my design career to focus on our family. One day, our child was sick. I went to take over the shift from Julien when I overheard him talking to my aunt on the stairs. “Julien, it’s been ten years. Joyce’s designs are getting better and better. She even passed the first round of the national competition. Are you really not going to tell her about the next round?” my aunt asked. Her voice trembled. Julien said coldly, “For years, I’ve been sending Joyce’s design sketches to Mindy to copy and enter in the competitions or publish as her own. “To help Mindy’s career, I can’t let Joyce move on to the next round. “Joyce has talent. If people notice her, she’ll be a threat to Mindy’s career!”

My husband has asthenospermia, so we decide to try IVF. Before the embryos are combined, I catch my husband switching my ovum out for his true love's. I don't say anything and switch them back. At the same time, I switch my husband's sample out for my ex-boyfriend's. 25 years later, my husband's true love comes knocking. She holds my daughter's hands and weeps while saying, "I'm your mother, my darling!"