Yo Mama So Old Jokes

A little over a month pregnant, I was happily looking forward to my wedding—until my fiance teamed up with my parents and brothers to put me on trial at the Court of Justice. They fabricated charge after charge, hoping to have me executed in the name of the law. If the judge found me guilty, I would be sentenced to death on the spot. Once I was dead, my corneas would be transplanted into my adopted sister, and everything I owned—my assets and insurance—would be claimed by them. Faced with my fiance’s betrayal and my family’s treachery, I fought back. I demanded the judge use the latest medical technology to extract my memories and project them on the big screen, letting the judge and hundreds of public jurors decide my fate. Just as everyone was smugly certain of their victory, the truth revealed by my memories moved the entire courtroom to tears.

It's Thanksgiving, and I'm waiting for Zeke Jones to come home after cooking up an extravagant meal. When Zeke returns, he doesn't even glance at the meal I've prepared for him. Instead, he proceeds to pack a bag. "I can't celebrate Thanksgiving with you this year," he says. I take another bite of my turkey and say nothing. At the stroke of midnight, Zeke's first love posts a new photo on her social media page. In the photo, she's lying on Zeke's back with a bright smile on her face. The moon outside the window is bright. "Happy to spend Thanksgiving with good company," her caption reads. Instead of hysterically questioning Zeke about the post, I just tap on the "like" button without reacting in any way. Zeke calls me. His voice sounds panicked as he tries to explain himself. "Please don't misinterpret the post. I will definitely spend Thanksgiving with you next year…" I freeze for a few moments, letting out a small laugh. I don't offer him a reply. Next time, he says? Oh, Zeke, I'm afraid there won't be a next time.

Elizabeth Lancaster, an 18 year old brought up with strict values and in a cold and stern environment, gets her first wish to venture to the outside world and taste freedom and gain new experiences and most importantly, FRIENDS. William Warren, a 19 year old college sophomore studying in the most sought after University, lacks nothing in life be it friends, girls, popularity, fame even money. He has everything but still isn't satisfied with life till someone manages to catch his attention. And boy is that someone so damn interesting that she knocked his soul out of his body the first time he laid eyes on her. Now he wants her, and the chase is about to begin but it is unclear who became the prey and who the hunter along the way.

After a drastic accident which rid her father of his job, Rose Monroe has to go into hustling to fend for the family. Out of options, she opts as a surrogate baby man for an unknown 'rich man' Yes, she got laid. Yes she gave birth to his kids. But that was all business. Yet why is he coming for more?!

A tale of two souls, intertwined by fate: One soul, cloaked with isolation and grief, was a solitary figure who struggles to connect with others. The other soul has a heart hardened against the possibility of love. Florence “Flo” Emry, now twenty-one, has retreated into a life of solitude following a traumatic car accident that occurred when she was sixteen. It changed her life forever. The accident left her completely deaf in one ear and partially deaf in the other as she needs hearing aid for it. She was devastated when she found out that she became disabled, but she was more broken when she also found out that she had tragically lost her parents and older brother in only one night. Feeling abandoned and worthless, Florence, who was filled with debt from her student loan, has become deeply disappointed and resentful towards herself, seeing herself as a useless human being. One fateful day, a chance encounter with a mysterious man named Zacchaeus “Chaos” Spencer Battenkurt the filthy rich billionaire playboy, 26 years old, turned her life upside down. This charismatic, very polite and respectful man, seemingly ordinary, was actually hiding a deep dark secret. These two souls, so different yet intertwined by fate, must navigate their own internal struggles while also confronting the challenges of their external world. But the question remains: Will they be able to break down their barriers and find solace in each other’s company or will their differences prove to be insurmountable obstacles?

The story of Sienna Zannotti and Eric Connall is not your typical love story. They are the leaders of rival mafia organizations, and when fate brings them together in an arranged marriage, sparks fly. Sienna is a fierce and unforgiving Don, while Eric is just as ruthless in his leadership of the American mafia. They both resist the idea of a marriage, but their parent's wishes leave them no choice. As they meet for the first time, they each find themselves drawn to the unexpected qualities of the other. Eric discovers a captivating woman in Sienna, and she finds him attractive despite his leadership position. But can two powerful and dominant mafia lords make a marriage work? Will they succumb to their differences and go their separate ways, or will they be able to find a common ground to build from? A Love So Dangerous is a journey through the obstacles of love and power, as Sienna and Eric navigate their way through their arranged marriage. Is their love powerful enough to withstand the forces surrounding them, or will the dangers of their worlds prove too much to bear?

คิดว่าหล่อลากไส้จัญไรลากดินแล้วผู้หญิงทุกคนต้องสยบให้เหรอ ไม่หรอกมั้ง อย่างน้อยก็ไม่รวมขนมคนสวยเซ็กซี่น่ารักดูดีมีเสน่ห์คนนี้ก็แล้วกัน!

"What's wrong with us making love Clark? I.. I like you, kaya anong mali sa gagawin natin?" Halos manginig ang kanyang boses. He smile weakly saka inayos muli ang kanyang roba. "Someday you'll going to thank me for not making love with you tonight." Iyon lang at tuluyan na itong tumalikod at tinungo ang pinto. "No Clark.." She whisper. Papalabas na ito. "Someday you'll going to regret not making love with me tonight." Puno ng pait na sambit niya. -----<<>>----- Hanggang saan ang kaya mong tiisin para sa pag-ibig? Ano ang kaya mong ibigay para sa pagmamahal? Paano kung ginawa mo na ang lahat ay hindi pa rin sapat? Arabella Santana, the sole heiress of Don Armando Santana, a billionaire magnate. Spoiled rotten by her father. What Arabella wants... Arabella gets. But not Simon Clark Dela Fuente. Tahasan pa rin nitong tinanggihan ang kanyang pag-ibig kahit handa niyang ibigay ang lahat-lahat.

In the eighteenth century Asia, nestled in eastern Korea, there was a peaceful and the most captivating kingdom called Noam, but even Confucius had his misfortunes. It was time when the royal family of Noam experienced a tragic incident. Queen Iseul, the beautiful fair royal consort of Noam, did something heinous against a poor girl with the help of a Shaman. The dying girl, with no other alternative, viciously cursed the Queen's unborn twins leaving behind a scar in the walls of the royal family. From there, the foundation of an unfortunate event started to set it's roots. The heart wrenching saga of misfortune inaugurated. The Devil's Bible was the last resort to lift up the curse, but unfortunately the solution to lift the curse leads to a bloody path. The major part of the story revolves around Si-ri, the cursed child and her journey to freedom. A girl who has been imprisoned in an old mansion by her father to ensure her safety.

Charlene, beautiful and elegant, suffered abuse in the hands of her foster family, her aunt and uncle after the death of her parents. Tired of the unending circle of torture, she packs up one day after she turned sixteen and ran off on her own. She had to do odd jobs, including regularly donating her blood to make some amount of money to take care of herself. On one of her regular trips to donate her blood, Charlene ends up in more trouble than she bargained for, getting herself entangled with the most ruthless billionaires in the country. Noah Cooper, the masked billionaire, is a name that many respect and fear. No one knows why he wears a mask, and those who dared to ask, ended up begging with their lives to be forgiven. He is ruthless, unforgiving and a silent poison, not one to be messed with. He hates women, and avoids them like a plague, but why? What happens when these two polar opposites meet? And what happens when they discover they're about to be parents in the most odd way possible?