You Re So Old Jokes One Liners

"Don't you think that skirt is short for you?" She says, changing the subject and taking another long hit from her blunt. Since when does she care about my clothing? Besides it's not like it's affecting anyone, so why does it matter? "Um, no. Why do you care anyways?" I ask suspiciously, while looking down at my skirt. It's not even short. "People are looking at you in there, and maybe it's because of what you're wearing," She throws her blunt on the ashtray that she has, and turns her attention on me staring fiercely into my eyes. "Why does it matter? It's not like it's a bad thing." I say, now worried at this point. I don't know what's going through her mind as she comes closer to me, again my back is against the wall beside the balcony railing. "It is a bad thing because it seems everyone in there wants to fuck you, and for some damn reason it's bothering me." Heaven says lowly, barely audible. ----- Hatred. Despite. Mixed feelings. Read to find out about Valentina and Heavens relationship, which starts off as despiteful, then turns into something pure.

"Strip naked." He commands with an authoritative seductive voice. "Huh! Why?" I asked because his outburst is surprising. "Just..." His voice trailed, as he made his way closer to me. "I want to see you naked." He whispers. I swallowed my saliva hard, as I made my way further inside the suite. Summoning up the courage, I unzip my red gown, while allowing the gown to freely flow down until it touches the floor. He smirks devilishly at me "Touch yourself." He commands. **** Cornelia Jamarreon is a young lady who is diagnosed with stage three cancer. All she ever wanted was to get married before her time on Earth came to an end. Her boyfriend dumped her on her birthday, leaving her so devastated that she ended up having a one-night stand with a stranger she knew nothing about. She awoke the next morning to discover that he had stolen her most valuable jewelry. 'Did I give my virginity to a thief?' She asked herself. "What would happen when Cornelia finally finds her Mister handsome? Will his family members accept her and her son?" "Will Cornelia live happily ever after, or will her cancer take her life?" Find out.....

After Roman Archer and I broke up, he devoted himself to academic research. He had finally become successful. During a television interview, he looked just as confident and high-spirited as he had been back then. The host asked whom he most wanted to share this news with. After a brief silence, he called me. “Celeste, thank you for leaving me. My career is thriving now.” I smiled. “Congratulations, Mr. Roman.” He would never know that if I had not left, he would have died.

Stephanie Young is left with a broken heart after her boyfriend Martin Clark forced her to abort their child. She decided to go to the club and offered a one-night stand to a random man. The decision on that night does not simply end there. The man she slept with was Lucas Miller, a billionaire from New York. Worse, Luke is Martin's business competitor. Luke went far by challenging Martin that he would take Stephanie from Martin’s hand. It was supposed to be a simple one-night stand, but now, where will it end? Find out more about the love-triangle story of Martin-Stephanie-Luke

Every time selected people are chosen to play ‘Halloween’s Party‘ these people are called as the ‘Players’. It is said that if you complete and clear the last game of ‘Halloween’s Party’ you will get what you desire the most. No matter the wealth, beauty, power or even immortality. But many people have tried and failed to clear the game. The most known safe way to exit the game is to clear the round of the game. If people really want to get away from the game there are two ways first is to die and another is to- [Ding! Welcome player no.35089 to ‘Halloween’s Party ‘] Then suddenly, I was selected as one of the ‘Players’ to participate in this mysterious game. But the thing is that I am certain that this is not my world, but a world of the novel more specifically a fantasy romance novel that suddenly gets turned into a horror novel.

(This book is a three part series) "She looks exactly like me but we're very different." Gabriella. "You're always gonna be beneath me no matter how hard you try." Gabrielle. Twin sisters, Gabriella and Gabrielle may look alike but they are definitely complete opposites. Gabrielle, the proud, popular and overly ambitious sister, who loves to be the center of attention and would go to any length to get whatever she wants, without any care of the consequences. Gabriella, as opposed to her twin sister is the quiet one, the gentle one and the smart one and she unlike her sister is not overly ambitious or power and fame hungry. Liam Helton, son of famous fashion designers in New York bumps into both sisters on the same day but on different occasions but falls in love with one and detests the other.

Si Crisanta ay may matagal ng pangarap na maging isang sikat na news writer kaya naman madalas siyang tumambay sa opisina ng kanyang ninong na hepe ng pulisya sa kanilang bayan upang makasagap ng scoop or balita. Dito niya unang nakita ang gwapo at makisig na pulis na si Sergeant Alexander Ricarfort, pangalan pa lang ang kisig na. Tinamaan ka agad siya ng palaso ni kupido lalo na ng masalat niya kung gaano "katambok" at "katigas" ang abs nito. Gumawa siya ng paraan para mapalapit sa binata at ng makakuha na rin siya ng magandang article para sa kanilang newspaper. ayun nga lang mukhang lagi siyang inaalat, dahil sa tuwing mag lalapit sila ni Alex ay kung ano-ano namang kapalpakan ang nagagawa niya na lalong ikinainis ng binata sa kanya. Paano pa kaya siya magugustuhan ni Alex kung lahat ng gusto nito sa isang babae ay wala sa kanya? idagdag pa na meron na pala itong "babe". Wala na nga kayang pag-asa ang mapagmahal na puso ni Cris para sa makisig nating pulis?

What do you do when you're the right-hand man to the kingpin of the mafia. When you're destined for power and wealth and so much more. And yet a single innocent woman forces you to face your inner self and finally find your true identity.

"I don't like you, Mr. Decarlo,"He eyed me with his stormy grey orbs. "The feeling's mutual,"In which Newton's laws of attraction have been violated...️Aeliana Winslow, has to endure two whole years of physics lectures conducted by the awfully attractive Spaniard, Professor Antonio Decarlo.

The day my sister slipped away from her engagement party, she was certain Marshall Patton could never truly fall in love with me. Confident in her belief, she left the country without hesitation, leaving me behind to hold her place and secure the title of Mrs. Patton in her stead. I didn't cry or make a fuss. Instead, I played the part of the obedient stand-in, giving everyone the courtesy of maintaining appearances while I quietly bided my time. Then, I poured every ounce of effort into making Marshall fall for me, bit by bit. And when my sister finally returned, I made sure to walk away.