You Re So Old Jokes One Liners

On our wedding night, my fiancé's best friend barged into our room for the third time, claiming a wedding prank. Having had enough, I warned Sam Whitman that if we didn't consummate our marriage that night, it was as good as over. He glanced at my half-unbuttoned dress and dismissed my words as a tantrum. Then Candace Lombard stormed in for the ninth time, ripped off the covers, and livestreamed our intimate moments. Sam merely pushed me aside and told me to be understanding. She climbed into our bed, smirking as she claimed the spot between us. "Wedding night prank? I get it," I grinned, leaning into her livestream camera. "Alright, everyone, fire up those donations! I'm about to let my husband take a mistress live. Let's make it a show!"

I'm Victoria Corsini, the only daughter of the Corsini family's Don in Iberny. The marriage alliance partner whom Father has picked out for me is Cesar Romano, the new mafioso upstart in the underworld. Cesar is an ambitious man who intends to take over the casino industry in Navoles City. However, he's in the middle of getting oppressed by the alliance of powerful families due to his shaky foundation. In short, he might file for bankruptcy anytime soon. This means his only way out is to marry me and ask for the Corsini family's protection. In order to uncover his true colors, I put on a disguise and infiltrate Cesar's casino as a greenhorn dealer. On my first day at the job, I feel someone gripping my wrist tightly. "What makes you think you get to deal in the VIP hall? You really think a nobody like you has the right to touch the chips here?" I look up to see Liliana Conti, the casino's manager. She happens to be wearing an arrogant look at the moment. Everyone else begins muttering among themselves. "Liliana is Mr. Romano's beloved lover. He has stated more than once that he'll give this casino to her as a gift." Liliana flashes me a contemptuous smirk. Then, she slams a tray of casino chips that are made of gold in my face. "Drag her out of the casino and chop her hands off! Make her understand that I, Liliano Conti, am the one who determines the rules on Cesar's turf!" I just chuckle icily in response. To think that I, the future mistress of this casino, am being threatened to get kicked out of the casino by a worker right now… After shaking the bodyguards off me, I dial Cesar's number and set the call on speaker mode in front of everyone. "Cesar, your manager is threatening to chop my hands off. She even declares that you've given her the right to set the rules in place. "It seems that your casino doesn't really need the Corsini family's support, after all. I suppose we can call off our marriage, then?"

I'm finally pregnant after five years of marriage. I initially want Morgan Holt to accompany me to the hospital so I can surprise him, but he stoically tells me that he hates hospitals. I can understand and accommodate that. Then, he surprises me—he accompanies his new junior to the hospital for a medical checkup. At that moment, I know our relationship is over. When I bid him farewell, I say, "She's your true love's younger sister, right? I can understand why you've transferred your love to her. I wish you two well." His eyes redden. "I can't live without you."

By my third month on the job, I discovered that my coworkers had been calling me "the old crow" behind my back. The nickname came from none other than Jace's condescending secretary—because at 32, I was still clutching onto an eight-year relationship that hadn't ended in marriage. I confronted Jace. "Do you know your employees have been calling me the old crow?" He didn't even bother to look up. "That's just Sadie—she speaks her mind and means no harm. You're 32; why get so worked up over what a young girl says?" Then he gave me a faint, mocking smile. "Though honestly, it's a pretty fitting nickname." It felt like a cold hand had wrapped around my heart. So that was it—eight years of my youth, nothing more than a joke to him. I turned and walked away, handed in my resignation, and blocked every way he could reach me. But for the first time, the man who had always seemed so calm and untouchable finally panicked. "Elara," he pleaded, "please come back."

Under the same roof with someone you find insanely attractive? Your supposed stepbrother? Sweet boy, bad boy all in one, horny devil for only you? count me in. ---------- She grew up beside him. Their parents got married. Best friends. Partners in crime. Practically family. But then… his older brother came home. And now her best friend’s house and new home doesn’t feel the same. Not with him in it. Nicolas, Tall, tattooed, and infuriatingly mysterious. He’s the boy who missed the wedding, the other brother she never met, the man who makes her heart race and her mind spin. But He’s also her best friend’s older brother. Her father's new step son. Her not so stepbrother. Off-limits. Or at least… he was supposed to be.

Firstly how to get inside the club (This is where Xain comes in) Get his attention #Santo De Luca the biggest player in the whole of America# Get called to his floor Have sex with him Collect 100 grand Save Sophie Chances of success 98% Chances of failure 2% Hey everyone This is my first time writing a novel So please drop a comment On your view of it Love you all

Synopsis Katherine McQueen's world shattered when her father borrowed from Massimo Hollingsworth, a ruthless New York billionaire who commands the fearsome Hollingsworth dynasty. When Massimo arrived to collect his due, a tragic accident left him in a coma. Desperate and cornered, Katherine was forced into a marriage she never wanted. His powerful relatives plotted his death, certain he wouldn’t survive, eager to erase her as well by throwing her out once she becomes a widow. But Massimo did survive. When he awakened, the ice in his gaze was nothing compared to the fury in his heart. He recognized Katherine as the daughter of the man who orchestrated his accident. Hatred replaced reason. Cruelty became his weapon. “I heard you might be pregnant with my child already? Abort it. I don’t want a child from your wretched bloodline.” Devastated, Katherine fled, building a new life far from his shadow. But seven years later, fate played its cruel hand again. At a bustling amusement park, her brilliant young son, a boy who looked like a miniature Massimo, pointed to a man on stage. “Mom, why does that man look so much like me?” “Because he’s your uncle. But remember, never cross his path. He’s dangerous… he even threatened me while I carried you.” Yet her son was no fool. Taking matters into his own hands, he wrote a letter to Massimo. "You are my dad, but you terrified my mother while she was pregnant with me. What kind of father does that make you? I hate that I look so much like you. But guess what? I’ve come to stay and suffocate you.”

What happens if the person you are chasing is also chasing someone else? Unique Aurella Ravenna Aglauros is a supermodel and a CEO that comes from the wealthiest family of Chicago. Finding true love for someone as busy, as famous, and as rich as Aurella is a very difficult task to accomplish. It might even be too impossible, so when her family arranged her to marry a CEO just like herself, hesitations were nowhere to be found. She agreed, and she eventually learned to be fond of him until she somehow fell in love. But when her long-awaited wedding day finally came, he changed his mind and left her standing at the altar with her expensive white gown stained with shame. Humiliated, she instead focused on becoming the best of her field just to forget that she let herself be fooled. Little did she know, there was someone else secretly yearning for her behind the competition between them in the business world. But how can a love story blossom in a toxic and chaotic environment? And how can he be capable of reaching her when she's chasing someone who's also busy running after someone else? Oh, how unlucky.

Just as she’s starting her new life in Las Vegas, she gets an urgent call to return home to Atlanta. Deila Barbson could be stubborn, witty…among other things but she wasn’t the rogue her family thought her to be so she answered with equal urgency oblivious to what awaited her— her past. She’s faced with the person that’s haunted her beautiful nightmares everyday for two years. Betrayed by her heart, she found herself running again from whom she still longed for as the very air she breaths. Breathing was as difficult as commitments. Would she stand unbroken or she melt under his touch? Time they said healed every wound so why did his heart still bleed at the sight of the woman that left him shattered sixteen months ago? Hard-headed as he was, James Martin felt open as if it were yesterday he got stood up on his planned proposal dinner. He wanted answers, from her, from himself; why didn’t he feel anger towards her for breaking his heart? Why was his heart still thudding with hope at the sight of her? Why did Deila still unman him as if he wasn’t the macho CEO that intimidated even the Mayor? And most importantly, why did she return? Behind the unwilling woman and broken man was the dark secret both their families shared. What would be keeping them apart? Their ego? Or the family secret? Warning: This book contains mature words and sexual encounters that aren't suitable for readers under the age of 18.

"Should I help you take off your pants, Mr. Nicolas?" offered Dianne innocently, she meant it because she was worried that her boss would find it difficult. "Are you crazy? I can do it myself!" Nicolas exclaimed in an embarrassed tone. Dianne scowled in a bad mood. "I'm just offering, there's no need to be upset." "I know, even though you might have seen me naked because we had sex before, but still I don't remember anything about you," Nicolas said with a face that was now as red as a tomato. Dianne did not comment, she immediately closed the toilet door and waited behind it while grumbling. "Had sex with him? Ridiculous!" ----------------------------- This is Dianne Rosallee's 100th day working as an apprentice secretary at the Buenos Solar Company, but the girl is very fed up with her boss, Nicolas Gauthier. Nicolas Gauthier is a symbol of ruthlessness and arrogance. The main director of the Buenos Solar Company hates even the slightest mistake made by his employees. He is typically a perfectionist, which makes his employees difficult and emotional stress. Dianne Rosallee is no exception. Dianne Rosallee is a symbol of hatred and determination. Her revenge to Nicolas led Dianne to another complicated and crazy problem. There is a dangerous enemy that is lurking and threatening their lives. The term 'Love Blossoms in the Middle of War' seems to apply to Nicolas and Dianne. But, why is a bitter secret revealed when the both of them have shared feelings for each other?