It Started When It Ended

Synopsis:

She's the girl who wants to die, or so at least that's what she says. 

Preview:

The moon is in its full phase, it gives a light glimmer to the lake, reflecting the tranquil water. There are no stars as there are a bunch of clouds hiding them behind. “You can’t sleep?” Chris just suddenly came out of nowhere. 

He always came out of nowhere anyway, so it isn’t a new thing. 

I held both of my hands on my chest to calm myself, “you’re here.” I cannot even speak straight. “Where else would I be,” just like me, he was staring at the scenery in front of us. The beauty of the lake in the night where the sun isn’t here to shine on it – to give us a warm feeling and a breathtaking view. “In the camper van, I supposed?”

“Hmm.” I could run away right now. Hell yeah. I’ve been thinking of getting away from here. I’ve been wanting to get as far as I could away from this guy who is just standing right beside me. I stayed quiet, gripping the glass tightly, calculating the next move that I should do.

“Leira?” I felt a shiver to my spine. The way he calls my name, it was with familiarity but there is  an unexplainable fear inside me right now. Before it was just something I thought as a feeling of safety and secureness but it is slowly fading away. “You do not believe me.” Here goes his statements that are always sure and that are always a reflection of what I truly really feel. 

I nodded hesitantly. What if a single movement that he never wanted me to do would trigger him to do something to me? The person beside me feels like a different person that I know, he isn’t just a soul traveler or whatever, he is something more than that. “Everything that I told you is true.” His voice is convincing me to believe him. He is trying to persuade me but my mind is closed because of my own judgment and discernment of things that he said.

When he moved close to me, I moved an inch away from him. It felt like to me that if I would get much closer, I would be close to a death that I don’t want. A death that I didn’t inflict on myself.

“Chris. Give me time to process everything.” I pleaded with him. As if I am the person who I was. The person that continuously pleads to her mother not to hurt her or tries to convince her father to help her. “You know how unstable I am, sa’yo na din nanggaling that you know me. Why can’t you understand me now?”

He came near to me again, trying to get the glass from my tight grip but I did not let go of it. “I know you too well, Leira, and the Leira of this world. I know her tendencies, when she would do something that I would disagree with." 

My sweat we’re building up. He got closer again and I cannot move away because I am trapped. Both of his hands were used to block me from moving away when my back hit the door. “What are you planning to do, Leira?” Now he is even trying to catch my eyes and make me look at him. I held the glass tightly as if, if I would let go of it – it would mean that I let go of my life.

“This is why I don’t wanna tell you these things. You would fear me, you would fear the things I’ve done. Worse is that you won’t ever believe me. It was so hard to reach you but now that I am here, I will never let go of this rare chance, Leira.” I closed my eyes. Even if I am trembling in fear and my breathing is much faster than normal, I tried my best to get away from him. I took my chance when he looked away from me as he tried to suppress his tears. I used the glass to hit him on the head and swiftly opened the door.

I ran as fast as I could without looking back. I ran without hesitation – barefooted. I ran into the woods even if it’s dark and I couldn’t see anything. I heard Chris’ groaning in pain. My hands were bloody but right now all I could think of was to run away.

“LEIRA! Come back here!” He was so furious and his voice is getting louder and louder which means that he is getting closer and closer to me. So I ran even without direction, I just followed my instinct and just kept running. Sweat was falling from my forehead and it was simultaneous with the drops of blood from my hands. Wala na akong pakialam kung mahapdi iyon at kahit ilang beses pa akong madapa o matusok ng matinik na mga damo at matutulis na bato ay wala akong pakialam.

I have to get as far as I can. 

I have to get away from this place where I am close to him.

But I tripped over a huge stone. I winced in pain and everything fell into darkness.