4: In The Books


I was able to convince mum I was ready for this. Ready for him. Ready to face him.

It is all I have been preparing for nonstop for six months. My every waking moment was plagued with thoughts of how I was going to get my revenge.

Like all the women in the history books I read.

Vengeance is what gives you the most satisfaction. And nothing beats making the people that hurt you pay for what they have done.

I picked up the book Kian had given me some time ago. I have read it more times than I can count one finger but I still find myself wanting to read more.

Each time feels like the first time I’m reading it.

Kian gets me more books when they go out, which isn’t a lot but none has been my favorite like this was. He got it for me the last time they went into town.

I was never allowed to go to avoid anyone seeing me and then reporting back to the people I was staying away from.

I wasn’t ready to be seen then, but now, we would do everything to make sure they saw us.

Shaking my head, I kept it on the bed, beside the duffel I’m carrying with me. I didn’t take much of my things. The plan is to do what we want as fast as we can and then leave.

We’ll come here and wait for him to lose his mind trying to find me.

Clearly, he wasn’t satisfied with the fact that I wasn’t dead and he plans on making that happen. Which is why I’ll be ready for him.

I’m delivering myself on a golden platter to him.

“Are you sure you want to do this now, sweetheart?” Mum asks, standing by the door of my room.

“I’m sure mum. I’m very sure.” I move forward and wrap my arms around her.

She hugs me back, equally tight and we stay that way for a few seconds. I love her natural scent that envelops me. It always makes me feel calm.

She is home for me as I am for her.

She releases me and I step back. Her eyes are sad as she takes me in. I hide the slight tremble of my hands and smile at her reassuringly.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous.

But, I was excited too and every once in a while, one wins over the other.

That didn’t mean I wasn’t ready for it. I was.

“I don’t want you hurt okay,” she cups my cheeks in her hand, making me look at her.

I nod and smile. She worries too much and she never wants to see me hurt.

It is why I stopped inviting her to come to training with me. She is a great fighter but she gets worried whenever I receive a hard hit or blow.

She knows I can handle it but with everything that the sperm donor—my supposed father—has put me through. She feels guilty and wants to give me everything. To make sure I never get hurt again.

That is not possible in a world like ours. Especially when we have plans for revenge.

“Promise me, sweetheart.” Her eyes soften

Probably for the first time, I see her eyes glisten with tears.

“Promise you’ll take care of yourself and if you feel you’re not ready and you need more time, at any point. Promise that you’ll let us know so we’ll back out.”

I place my hand over hers and give it a squeeze. I don’t break eye contact as I reply. Knowing it is important for her.

“I promise mum.” I repeat her words. “I’ll back out and call you if it gets too much or I panic.”

She nods and sighs, the worry still in her eyes.

“I’ll be fine,” I give her a small smile. “I’m your daughter. I have your strength.”

That makes her nod and I see her confidence grow. The worrisome and motherly side of her is replaced with the leader and fighter side. She doesn’t see just her little girl right now. She sees the woman she trained.

I am empowered knowing I have her blood running through my veins.

“Now, you be great honey.” She gives my shoulder a pat. “Make ‘em pay for underestimating you.”

I grin widely, my shoulders squaring.

A honk sounds from the front door and mum sighs, her eyes becoming sad again. I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze, my way of letting her know I’ll be fine.

This is only the first phase of the mission. It is not the hardest, not by a lot, it is the simplest even, but also the most important.

We are going into the belly of the beast and he needs to know we’re there. How the situation is tricky is the way we’re going to get out.

“Am I interrupting?” Kian’s voice makes us break away.

Mum straightens her back and gives him a single nod.

“No, you’re right in time.” She replies.

Her voice has gone back to normal and she sounds like her usual self. The commanding woman that saved hundreds of women and children alone. She had no help and she was in danger herself.

“What am I helping you with, Drea?” I motion to the single suitcase and duffel that I’m carrying with me. “Traveling light, are we?”

I shrug. I didn’t need to pack anything extra. I had only the necessary things I needed.

As Kian goes to carry the backpack, he sees the book he gave me and he smiles. He looks at me over his shoulder but I look away, pretending I didn’t see him.

He helps me pick it up and puts it in the bag, then he walks out without a word.

“Ready?” Mum asks finally, giving me her hand.

I glance at myself in the mirror, then turn back to her and smile.

“I was born ready.”

It is the world that is not ready for me.

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