LOGIN~ Cole ~ The next morning she started having a mental breakdown while shouting at me, then she went silent walked into the bathroom and slammed the door. I knew something was off before she said it. Mara doesn’t fall apart in like a destructive way, She goes quiet. That’s how she protects herself. Pulls everything in, locks it down, acts like she’s fine until she doesn’t have anything left to hold it together with. Last night proved it. She said she didn’t feel like herself. She said it like it scared her. And now I can’t unsee it. The house is quiet this morning. I’m already awake when the baby starts crying. I don’t even wait. I’m out of bed before it gets loud enough to wake Lily. Mara doesn’t move. I glance back at her once before I leave the room. She’s turned away again, in the same position she fell asleep in. She didn’t move much last night either. Barely reacted when the baby cried. Barely spoke after what she said. I don’t push it. I can’t. Not
~ Mara ~ The crying isn’t unfamiliar. That’s the problem. I know this sound. I’ve heard it before. I’ve handled it before. There’s nothing new about it, nothing confusing, nothing I haven’t already done years ago with Lily. And yet— Whatever I do is not working. I stand in the nursery, holding him against my chest, shifting his weight slightly as I move back and forth across the room. My steps are steady. The same rhythm I used before. The same way I rocked Lily, the same way that used to calm her down. But he keeps crying. “I fed you,” I murmur, adjusting his position again, checking his blanket, his temperature, everything out of habit. “You’re fine.” My voice sounds calm but it doesn’t feel calm. I pause, listening, trying to hear something different in his cry. Something that tells me what I’m missing. Because there has to be something. There always was before. I shift him to my shoulder, rubbing his back slowly. Waiting. Nothing. The sound cuts thr
~ Mara ~ Two weeks later, they finally discharged me. It doesn’t feel like a big moment. No relief. No excitement I feel pain sitting deep in my bones as my bruised and swollen p***y throbs, while a nurse explains things I already know I won’t follow properly because I remember nothing about this is going to be easy. “Rest as much as you can,” she says. I nod like that’s possible. Cole stands beside me, holding the baby, listening to everything like it’s instructions he plans to memorise. “I’ve got her,” he tells the nurse when she looks at him. The nurse studies him, then nods. “Good.” That’s it. We leave. Lily walks on my other side, her hand wrapped around mine, she’s been quiet a lot lately which is unusual. “You okay?” I ask her softly. She nods. “Yeah.” But she squeezes my hand tighter. The drive back is silent, I got the feeling that Cole and Lily were thinking of how to adjust to the Idea of the baby interrupting our already established living situat
~ Mara ~ I don’t wake up gently. I come back in pieces. First the weight in my body, then the ache, then the sound of a small, uneven breath that doesn’t belong to me. My eyes open slowly, and the room settles into place around me. Hospital walls. Dim light. The steady quiet that only exists after something big has already happened. My head turns slightly, careful this time, and the first thing I see is Cole standing near the window, holding something in his arms like he doesn’t trust the world not to take it. Him. My chest tightens instantly. “Cole,” I whisper, my voice barely there. He turns fast. Too fast for someone trying to stay calm. His eyes find mine, and something in his facial expression changed, like he’s been holding everything in place and just loosened his grip a little. He walks over without saying anything, each step, careful like he’s carrying something fragile enough to break if he moves wrong. “You’re awake,” he says quietly. “I am,” I answer, watc
~ Cole ~ The room is a mess of white noise, medical equipment, and the sound of my son crying like he's trying to tear the walls down. I’m standing right where I was when it happened, but it feels like I got left behind somewhere between before and now. Mara’s breathing is still uneven, her chest rising and falling like she just ran through something she barely made it out of. But she’s not looking at me. She’s looking at him. Like nothing else exists. Like the room, the people, the pain, all of it got pushed out for that one moment. “…hi,” she whispers to him. Her voice is softer than I’ve ever heard it. I don’t move. I don’t speak. Because I don’t know what I’m supposed to do here. A nurse steps closer to me, her voice calm but direct. “Do you want to hold him?” she asks I don’t answer immediately. My eyes stay on the baby. On him. He's Small. Too small. Wrapped up and still loud like he’s announcing himself to a world that doesn’t know wha
~ Mara ~ Time doesn’t move right anymore. I don’t remember getting out of the car. I don’t remember walking in. I remember people touching me. And voices saying “Ma’am, stay with me—” “I’m here,” I answer, but I don’t know if it comes out right. Another contraction hits and everything else disappears. It’s not just pain. It’s force. Like my body is trying to split in two without asking me. “Okay, Mara, breathe,” a nurse says firmly, her hands steady on my arm. “I am breathing,” I say, but it comes out broken, uneven. “Not like that...slowly,” she corrects, I shake my head slightly, my fingers gripping the edge of the bed....Ohhh, I felt like chewing on her neck. “I can’t—” I try to say “You can,” she cuts in. I don’t believe her. But my body doesn’t give me a choice. Another wave crashes through me and I gasp, my back arching slightly as I fight it. “Cole,” I manage, my voice barely holding together. “I’m here,” he answers He’s close.
Mara The knock came hard enough to rattle the door. Heavy and Urgent. I was halfway through shoving Lily’s lunch into her bag when it happened, my pulse already spiking before my brain caught up. My body knew the sound. Knew the weight behind it. “Shit,” I muttered, wiping my hands on my
Mara She didn’t introduce herself. She didn’t have to. That witch, Vanessa stood in front of me like she belonged there, like the sidewalk outside Lily’s school was her territory and I was the one trespassing. Polished hair. Perfect posture. A smile that didn’t reach her eyes. I knew that
Mara The ride was quiet. Not awkward. Not heavy with forced conversation. Just quiet in the way that made my thoughts louder than the engine beneath us. Cole didn’t touch me more than necessary. His hand stayed steady at my waist, firm enough to keep me balanced, distant enough to r
Cole By the time I shut my door, it was already done. That was the truth I didn’t want to look at. The clubhouse noise faded behind me, but the damage didn’t stay there. It followed. Sat heavy in my chest. Quiet. Certain. I hadn’t needed Jax to say anything. I hadn’t needed Rhea’s look when







