My Crazy Normal

I put my ear on Dad's office door. I had to hear what they were saying. Ethan and Cade were talking with Dad, and I heard words like "royal castle" and "King's Council."

My heart started beating really fast. Were they talking about the Royal Competition? The one everyone always talked about?

"We leave next week," Dad said. "This is our chance to get real influence with the king.”

"We won't mess up, Father," Ethan said. He sounded so sure of himself.

Next week. They were going next week, and nobody told me.

I moved back from the door and knocked loud.

"Come in," Dad called out in his rough voice.

I opened the door and walked in. My boots made noise on the wood floor. Dad sat behind his big desk with some fancy paper that had the royal mark on it. Ethan and Cade stood next to him, looking happy.

"Aria," Dad said. He didn't even look at me. "What do you want?"

"I heard you guys talking about the royal castle. Are you going to the Royal Competition?"

Ethan gave me a mean look. "This isn't about you, Aria."

"Yes, it is." I walked closer. My hands were shaking a little. "I want to go too."

Nobody said anything. Dad finally looked up at me. His gray eyes looked cold and mean.

"What did you say?"

"I want to compete. I want to help our pack too."

Dad sat back in his chair and laughed. But it wasn't a nice laugh. It was mean and ugly. "You? Compete? Aria, you can't even take care of  the pack finances right. But you will accompany  brother and Cade."

"That's not true, and you know it. I've been taking care of the pack finances perfect for two years."

"Even if that was true," he said, sounding like he hated me, "the Royal Competition isn't about money. It's about being strong, being a leader, knowing politics. It's a tournament held every few years where packs compete for honor and status. You don't know any of that."

I felt like I was going to cry, but I wouldn't let him see it. "How do you know what I can do? You never let me try."

"Because there's nothing to try!" His voice got really quiet and scary. "You're weak, just like your mom was. And look what happened to her."

It felt like he hit me in the stomach. He never said it like that before, but I always knew he blamed me for Mom dying.

"You killed her when you were born," he kept going, his voice full of hate. "And now you think you can compete with real fighters? You're crazy."

"I'm a Blackwood too," I said really quiet. "This pack is my family just like it's theirs."

"No, it's not. Ethan is the future Alpha. Cade will be his Beta. You?" He looked at me like I was disgusting. "You're just the mistake that killed my wife."

I wanted to run to my room and cry, but something inside me wouldn't give up. "Please, Dad. Let me try. What bad thing could happen?"

"You could make our whole pack look stupid. Make us look weak in front of the King and all the other Alphas."

"Or I could show that Blackwood girls are strong too, not just boys."

For a second, something changed in his eyes. Not pride, never that—but maybe he was curious about how bad I'd fail.

"Fine," he said. "You want to embarrass yourself in front of everyone? Go ahead. But let me tell you something—when you fail, and you will fail, don't come back. I'll kick you out of the family. You'll prove you're nothing but the worthless mistake I always knew you were."

Ethan stepped closer. "Dad, are you sure about this—"

"She wants to prove herself?" Dad's voice was final and mean. "Let her. Maybe watching her fail will finally teach her where she belongs."

I swallowed hard. I don't want to do this, I'm comfortable taking care of the pack finances and duties but my father  always see me as something he wished he never had. All I could do now is compete to prove to him. I will sign up for this competition. Something that could destroy my life. "When do we leave?"

"Next week. Seven days to get ready for the biggest mistake of your sad life."

I turned and walked to the door. My legs were shaking.

"Aria," Dad called out. I stopped but didn't turn around. "This doesn't change anything with us. You're still the reason Mom is dead. And after next week, you'll also be the daughter who proved she was never good enough to be a Blackwood."

His words followed me out, but this time, they also made something burn in my chest. I asked for this chance, fought for it, and now I had days to get ready to prove that Aria Blackwood was more than just the daughter who killed her mother.

I was going to show him that a daughter could be just as strong as any son. That girls could be Alpha too.

Or I'd lose everything trying.

****

I found Luna in the pack house living room. She was on one of the couches reading a love story book. Her curly brown hair fell over her shoulder as she read, and her green eyes were focused on the page.

"Let me guess," she said without looking up. "Your dad was mean to you again."

"I'm going to the Royal Competition."

That made her look up fast. Her eyes went wide. "Wait, what? But I thought only Ethan and Cade were going—"

"I asked to go. Actually, I begged." I fell down on the couch next to her. "And he said yes, but only because he wants to watch me fail."

"Aria, this is so cool! Do you know how many single guys will be there? You could finally meet your mate!"

"Luna." I grabbed her hands. "My first goal is proving to my father that girls can be Alpha too. Everything else comes after that."

"But still, it could happen. Think about it, Aria. Wolves from everywhere, all in one place. The Moon Goddess works in strange ways. And you're 23 Aria. Still haven't found your mate. This could be fate"

"Luna, can I ask you something?"

"Always."

"Do you think dads can love daughters the same way they love sons?"

She was quiet for a long time. "Is this about your mom?"

My chest felt tight. "Maybe."

Luna reached over and held my hand. "Aria, what happened to your mom wasn't your fault. You were just a baby."

"But he blames me for it. I can see it in his eyes sometimes. Anytime he looks at me"

"Or maybe he sees her in you, and it hurts him."

I never thought about it like that before. My mom died when I was born, and I spent my whole life knowing that me being alive cost her life. Dad never said it out loud until today, but I could always feel how disappointed he was. Ethan was the perfect son, the future Alpha. I was just the daughter who killed her mom by being born.

"What if I could prove to him that I'm worth something?" I said quietly. "What if I could show him that being a girl doesn't make me weak or useless?"

"How?"

The idea was growing in my head. It was crazy and probably impossible, but it was there. "What if I could prove that a daughter can be just as strong as a son? What if I could show him that I could be Alpha too?"

Luna's eyes went really wide. "Aria, are you talking about fighting Ethan for Alpha?"

"Not fighting. Just... proving that I can do the same things he can. Dad thinks girls are only good for helping their brothers or finding good mates. But what if I could show him something different?"

"At the Royal Competition?"

"Maybe."

I looked at myself in the mirror across the room. My long black hair was messy from listening at doors, and my blue eyes looked tired. I was tall for a girl, almost as tall as some guys, but Dad always said I was too thin to be a real fighter. My pale skin showed every bruise from secret training, but I kept training anyway.