Are You Gay Now

“Her? Like you are gay now? I’m okay with that mom. I just didn’t know that is all,” Keegan said, reaching for his mom’s hand.

He stroked her hand gently.

“Yes Kee, myself and Missy are together now and we are very happy,” she said, squeezing my mom’s hand and beaming a smile towards her direction.

“Wait what? Like you and Bay’s mom are…” his eyes opened extremely wide, “are you guys a couple?” he asked.

Kyren and my mom nodded. No one said anything for what seemed like forever. Suddenly, Keegan jumped up from the table and ran out of the dining room.

“Naw, fuck this. What the hell is happening,” he yelled as he almost knocked over the lamp by the door.

Baylen went to go after him, but I stopped him. “Let me Bay,” I insisted.

He nodded and gestured towards the door. I ran outside to find Keegan as fast as I could. He was sitting on the swing. This was the same place he had stopped speaking to me a few months ago and I feared the outcome this time as well.

I didn’t speak. I just sat far away from Keegan on the swing. He didn’t look at me. He was muttering something under his breath but I couldn’t make out what it was. We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. Then he turned towards me.

“Brees,” he started, “why is my whole world falling apart around me?” he asked with teary eyes.

I didn’t know why. I didn’t know how to comfort him. I wanted to hold him and show him how much he is loved, but we don’t have that kind of friendship any longer and it hurts.

“Kee, it may not seem like it now, but everything is going to be alright. Your mom is happy, your sisters are well taken care of, you have your senior year to show scouts what you can do with that lethal foot of yours and you have friends that love you,” I consoled.

“Yeah, friends…” he repeated sarcastically.

I looked away from his gaze. This is the difficult part of our friendship. We have feelings that are stronger than friendship, but neither of us are at the point where we can act on those. So this is where we stay.

“I know my mom is happy. I can see it in her face and mannerisms, but it doesn’t mean this doesn’t hurt Brees. I will give it a chance, but don’t expect me to be their biggest cheerleader. I have seen my mom hurt and I don’t want to see it again,” he said standing up.

I nodded in agreement and we walked back inside. I think the hard part was over and now everyone could focus on healing.

Keegan hugged both of our moms and apologized for walking out. They were very understanding and the dinner moved on pretty smoothly. But just as I thought things were going great, Ms. Kyren said something that blew my mind.

“Kee, did you share with Baylen that Jada’s dad got the scouts at Florida State to look at your reel?” she said excitedly.

He shook his head while taking a drink of his soda.

“Yep, and guess what? They loved him! They said he has had some of the most accurate punts and field goals they have seen out of any juniors they have screened. They are talking about offering him a scholarship next year if he continues to put up similar numbers!” she squealed.

Keegan looked around nervously at all of us. He kept missing my glance. Baylen jumped up and put Keegan into a gentle headlock.

“Bro, you never said you were interested in FSU! I thought LSU was it for you! This is amazing news!” Baylen beamed.

As everyone congratulated Keegan, the words seemed to hit an empty shell of a person. He was taking it in but no emotion was being put back out. This was all too much for him right now and it showed. Even more so, what would I do if Keegan Patts moved to Florida after his senior year?