20. Feeling like shit

"Ella honey, it's been almost two months."

Jacqueline was getting frustrated with me, while Gemma was being ignorant. She was letting me be, as long as I was not suicidal. She kept on saying to Jacqueline and Benji that people deal with their issues in their own way.

That's how sweet Benji was hands-off and decided to keep on cooking, turns out that my stress was giving him more stress that he decided to keep on cooking and send out the excess food to the homeless shelter.

My hands were moving on their own, continuing to slap strokes of grey on the large canvas.

Two months into my depression, I was actually making money from my paintings and I have decided to move to the apartment next door to Gemma which recently became available.

It's a smaller one-bedroom apartment with a great living room space for my studio. I love Gemma, I love living with her, but I didn't want to disrupt her vibe because I've been different since Brice and I don't think I can change back to the old me.

I think