The Full Moon I Left Him

I lay unconscious in the forest at the pack's border for half the night before a patrol guard found me and carried me back to pack territory.

Lying on the bed in the healing room, my calf still throbbed with a dull ache.

I touched my belly and closed my eyes, and all I could see was Lucas choosing to leave me behind without a second thought when the attack happened yesterday.

For the past six months, ever since the day he brought Vivian back to the territory, my hopes had been worn away, bit by bit, through countless moments of being overlooked.

I forced my weak body out of bed and leaned against the wall as I went to find the healer for some pain-relieving herbs.

Passing the main hall on the east side, I heard Vivian's soft, spoiled complaining drifting from inside.

"Alpha, this calming herb brew is so bitter, I can't drink it..."

I stopped and peered through the half-open door.

Lucas was half-kneeling beside the table, a warm stone bowl in his hands, patiently stirring it with a wooden spoon.

Then he pulled a small jar of wild honey royal jelly from the pouch at his waist.

He scooped out a full spoonful and stirred it into the bitter brew.

"Drink it, Vivian. I added honey to the medicine. It won't be bitter."

Vivian sat in the cushioned chair, obediently cradling the bowl. She took a small sip, then lifted her tear-shimmering eyes to him.

"Thank you, Alpha... but this honey is so precious. You prepared it carefully for Eileen, didn't you? Will she be angry with me if she finds out?"

Lucas shook his head gently.

"She's the Luna of the pack, the tribe's witch. She understands the bigger picture. She won't hold a small thing like this against you."

I stood outside the hall, the cold wind cutting through my thin clothes, and my chest went numb.

Last winter, I'd performed a blessing ritual for the pack and drained myself so badly I came down with a high fever. I couldn't even swallow water.

Lucas had stayed up all night watching over me just like that, braving a blizzard to smoke out a wild beehive on the cliff's edge.

His hands had been swollen and red from the stings, all just to coax a single sip of medicine into me.

Back then, he'd kissed my forehead with red-rimmed eyes and sworn he'd always keep me at the center of his heart.

Now, that singular tenderness had been handed over, untouched, to another woman.

Lucas sensed the presence outside the door and turned to look at me.

A flicker of panic crossed his eyes. He set down the stone bowl, stood, and strode quickly out of the hall.

He pulled the door shut behind him, blocking out the warmth inside, and reached for my shoulder.

"Eileen, you're awake? Is your wound still hurting?"

I turned aside to avoid his touch, my gaze landing on the smear of yellow honey at his collar.

Lucas's hand hung frozen in midair. He pressed his lips together, his expression a little unnatural.

"It happened so fast. Vivian was too far from the safe zone. Her brother died taking a fatal claw strike for me during the pack war. I swore I'd protect her."

He wasn't looking me in the eye, his thumb rubbing unconsciously at the knife hilt at his waist.

"Besides, you're the tribe's witch. You can protect yourself. That's why I reacted on instinct and got her out first. I thought you'd be able to catch up after."

"Stop sulking. Rest well tonight. Tomorrow I'll have two fine snow-fox pelts sent to you for a cloak."

If this were before, I might have still choked back tears and demanded to know why he was so sure that I, wounded as I was, could survive alone against a pack of wolves.

But now, looking at the indifference in his eyes, I didn't even have the energy to open my mouth.

I didn't argue. I turned and walked back to my own chamber.

From the very bottom of the cabinet, I took out a sealed little obsidian vial. Inside was the bond-breaking potion I'd brewed three days ago.

I'd still been hesitating then, still clinging to the hope that he might remember even a trace of what we'd once had.

But the biting cold of the forest last night had woken me up completely.

Once I drank it, on the full moon three days from now, the mate bond between Lucas and me would shatter completely, beyond any repair.

I pulled out the wooden stopper and tipped the bitter potion down my throat in one go.

A burning pain seared up my throat. I clutched my chest and collapsed onto the bed, but my heart was utterly calm.

Lucas, since you've already broken every promise you ever made.

Then three days from now, I'll give you back your freedom. For good.